10 phrases that self-respecting men never say to their partners

If you’re a man and want to make sure you don’t cross any lines, or if you’re a woman and you don’t like how your man speaks to you – this article is for you.

Now, every couple has its own communication style.

So, what might be considered inappropriate or disrespectful in one relationship may be totally normal in another, it all depends on the context and the dynamics of the relationship.

However, there are certain “universal” things that self-respecting men would never ever say to their partners.

I’m talking about rude and disrespectful comments that could cause pain or embarrassment.

Let’s take a look, shall we?

1) Insults or name-calling

Relationships are hard work and even the happiest ones have their ups and downs.

No matter how much two people love one another and how well they get on, there are bound to be misunderstandings, conflicts, and disagreements.

It’s perfectly normal to get frustrated and even angry with your partner from time to time.

Personally, I don’t know of a single couple that never fights.

But here’s the deal, no matter how bad an argument may get, a self-respecting man would never dream of using derogatory terms or insults, not even in the heat of the moment.

Here are some examples of insults and name-calling that he’d never resort to:

  • “You’re so stupid; I can’t believe I have to explain this to you.”
  • “You think you could do better than me? Take a look in the mirror, Miss Piggy!”

2) Comparisons

The way I see it, when you’re in a relationship with someone, it’s because you choose to be.

There’s something about the other person that you’re attracted to and you like being in their company.

That’s why self-respecting men never ever compare their partners negatively to others, especially not their exes.

So for example, you’d never hear them say, “Why can’t you be more like so and so?” or “You know, my ex used to cook for me every day.”



a. Comparisons can be hurtful.

b. They’ve made their choice. If they wanted to be with their ex or someone else, they would be.

A self-respecting man doesn’t want to change his partner, he likes her just as she is (imperfections and all).

3) Blame-shifting

The great thing about self-respecting men is that they’re grown-ups who take responsibility for their actions.

They don’t play games or lie when they make a mistake, and they most certainly don’t place the blame on their partner.

You won’t hear them say things like, “The only reason I did that was because you…”

Even when the situation is complicated and their partner shares some of the blame, they know that it takes two to tango so they’d never say, “You see what you did?” or “This is all your fault. I knew it was a bad idea to…”

4) Threats

They’re not the mafia to be making threats!

Self-respecting men are gentlemen and they’d never threaten their partners physically or emotionally.

No phrases like, “I’m warning you” or “I swear if you…”

Threats of any kind have no place in a healthy relationship.

Plain and simple.

If you’re a man and find yourself making threats of any kind, you should know that it’s completely unacceptable behavior.

And if you’re a woman dating someone who threatens you, someone you don’t feel safe with, you need to leave them.

Find someone to talk to about what’s going on, someone who can help you get out of the scary situation you find yourself in.

5) Dismissing feelings

Phrases such as, “You’re overreacting” or “You’re too sensitive” invalidate the other person’s feelings which is why no self-respecting man uses them.

They believe – and rightly so – that we’re all entitled to our feelings.

They care about and respect their partners which is why they listen to what their partners have to say and try to understand why they feel the way they feel.

6) “You always…” or “You never…”

Look, I know how tempting it is to generalize when you’re upset and arguing with someone.

Suddenly all the times they did or said something to upset you come flashing back and you feel like you need to bring them up.

But here’s the thing, generalizations are often counterproductive and can lead to defensiveness and resentment.

When there’s conflict within the relationship, self-respecting men want to find a solution and the best way to do that is to focus on the issue at hand instead of making sweeping statements.

In other words, they’ll address the specific problem and try to find a solution together.

7) “I told you so”

I think I speak for most people when I say making mistakes feels pretty shi**y.

It feels even shi**ier if someone had warned you that you were making a mistake but you ignored them believing you knew best.

That’s the reason self-respecting men never tell their partners “I told you so.”

They know that the other person already feels bad enough. They know that they made a mistake and they probably won’t make it again, no reason to rub it in, that would be cruel.

8) “It’s just a joke, don’t be so sensitive”

Jokes are supposed to be funny, not make someone feel bad about themselves.

The reason a self-respecting man wouldn’t say, “It’s just a joke, don’t be so sensitive” is because he wouldn’t make a mean or insensitive joke in the first place.

He knows that it’s important to choose his words carefully – both when being serious and funny.

9) Gaslighting

Any kind of phrase that makes the other person think they’re imagining things or losing their mind is cruel.

That’s why no self-respecting man would ever say anything like, “It’s all in your head” or “You’re imagining things” to try and cover up for something he did.

Gaslighting is a cruel way of convincing someone of one’s innocence or getting them to leave a certain subject alone. It’s definitely not something you do to someone you care about.

10) “If you don’t know what’s wrong, I’m not gonna tell you.”

Expecting someone to read your mind is hardly the best form of communication.

It’s not always obvious to other people when someone is upset, which is why it’s important to be able to talk about one’s feelings.

If a self-respecting man has a problem with his partner, he’ll come out and say it. He knows that it’s important to communicate openly and clearly in a healthy relationship.

Final thoughts

Self-respecting men care about their partners and take their feelings into consideration which is why they choose their words carefully.

Respectful communication is the pillar of a healthy relationship and if that’s what you want, you need to use supportive and uplifting phrases that contribute to a positive and harmonious environment.

Jelena Dincic

Jelena has a background in photography and film-making and has spent the last few years as a content editor and copywriter. Jelena is a citizen of the world who is passionate about travel and learning about new cultures. She’s a foodie who loves to cook. And, as an art lover, she is always experimenting with new art mediums. When she’s not at her computer, she’s usually out and about in some forest with her dogs.

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