9 phrases narcissists use to gain your trust

Navigating relationships can be challenging, particularly when dealing with individuals who exhibit narcissistic tendencies. Trust is a cornerstone of any healthy connection, but narcissists can manipulate this concept to their advantage.

Narcissists have a knack for using language to gain your trust while masking their real intentions. They are adept at turning any conversation into an opportunity to gain your confidence, often with a well-placed word or phrase.

Understanding these phrases can equip you with the insight needed to recognize manipulative tactics and protect your well-being. Here are 9 phrases narcissists often use to secure your trust.

1) “I understand you better than anyone else”

Ever heard a narcissist say, “I understand you better than anyone”? It’s not just chatter; it’s a calculated move.

They use this line to forge intimacy and trust, painting themselves as your ultimate confidant. But beware: behind the empathy act lies manipulation.

By convincing you they ‘get’ you like no one else, they aim to control your narrative, isolating you from differing viewpoints.

So, next time you hear those words, read between the lines. It’s not empathy; it’s manipulation. 

2) “You’re the only one who gets me”

“You’re the only one who gets me.” It’s a line straight out of the narcissist’s playbook, crafted to make you feel like a VIP. It’s flattering, sure, but beware: it’s also a trap.

By claiming you’re the sole understanding soul in their life, they’re boxing you in, making you feel obligated to stick around. It’s a heavy emotional load they’re dumping on your shoulders.

But here’s the reality check: You’re not responsible for their emotional baggage. Your well-being comes first, always.

3) “I’m just being honest with you”

Narcissists love to lubricate it with “I’m just being honest with you” before dropping a verbal bombshell. It’s their sneaky way of justifying hurtful comments as brutal truth.

But here’s the kicker: When you react to their cruelty, they dismiss it as your inability to handle reality. Talk about gaslighting!

Let’s set the record straight: Honesty shouldn’t hurt like this. It’s about speaking your mind while respecting others’ feelings.

Ready to dive deeper? Check out my eye-opening video on new age spiritual narcissism. It sheds light on manipulative behaviors lurking in unexpected places.

This understanding can be an essential tool in navigating interactions with narcissists and protecting your emotional well-being. To continue exploring these ideas and join a community of over 20,000 people committed to living life with more purpose and freedom, feel free to subscribe to my YouTube channel.

4) “No one else will love you like I do”

One of the most insidious phrases a narcissist wields is, “No one else will love you like I do.” It’s a toxic ploy that exploits your vulnerabilities, making you believe their twisted version of love is somehow exceptional and irreplaceable.

This phrase digs deep, planting seeds of doubt about your worthiness of genuine love and respect. It’s a manipulative tactic aimed at keeping you under their control.

But here’s the truth: Love shouldn’t come with strings attached or conditions. It’s about mutual respect, empathy, and growth. Real love uplifts and empowers, never manipulates or belittles. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.

5) “You’re too sensitive”

Narcissists often use the dismissive phrase, “You’re too sensitive,” to downplay your emotions and experiences. When you express hurt or discomfort, they shift the blame onto you, making you doubt yourself.

This tactic, known as gaslighting, aims to undermine your confidence and manipulate your perception of reality. It’s a subtle form of control that erodes your sense of self.

But remember: Your feelings are valid, and no one has the right to invalidate them.

6) “I’m sorry you feel that way”

This phrase might initially sound like an apology, but it’s far from it.

When a narcissist says, “I’m sorry you feel that way,” they’re not acknowledging their role in causing hurt or discomfort. Instead, they’re placing the blame on you for feeling a certain way.

It’s a subtle form of manipulation, one that keeps the focus on your reaction, rather than their behavior. That’s how they effectively divert attention away from any wrongdoing on their part.

7) “I didn’t mean it like that”

When confronted by a narcissist about their hurtful words or actions, they frequently resort to saying, “I didn’t mean it like that.” This response is a clever evasion tactic aimed at sidestepping accountability for their behavior.

In uttering these words, they subtly shift the blame onto you, insinuating that the issue lies with your interpretation rather than their actions. It’s a cunning strategy to undermine your feelings and make you doubt your own judgment and reactions.

8) “You’re overreacting”

Similar to calling you “too sensitive,” a narcissist may accuse you of overreacting to divert attention away from their actions. By labeling your response as an overreaction, they undermine your feelings and create doubt in your mind about the validity of your reactions.

Bottom line: Your emotions are your personal barometer and should not be dismissed or invalidated by anyone else. You have the right to feel and express whatever emotions arise in response to someone else’s actions.

9) “I’m only doing this for your own good”

Narcissists love throwing around this phrase to justify their controlling antics. They mask their manipulation as if they’re genuinely worried about you, making it tricky for you to call them out.

But hey, let’s get real here. This goes totally against my belief that everyone deserves respect and autonomy. Genuine care for someone means letting them make their own choices, not pulling strings behind their back.

Understanding the narcissist’s playbook

Not unlike the intricate biochemistry of introverts and acetylcholine, human interactions and relationships are complex, often influenced by underlying psychological factors.

One such factor is the ability to recognize and understand manipulative tactics, particularly those used by narcissists. Awareness is our first line of defense, equipping us with the tools to protect our emotional well-being and maintain healthier relationships.

This exploration of phrases commonly used by narcissists to gain your trust offers an insight into their playbook. However, it’s important to remember that recognizing these phrases is the beginning, not the end. It’s a stepping stone towards reclaiming your agency and fostering authentic relationships guided by respect and mutual understanding.

In light of this, I invite you to reflect on your experiences. Have you encountered these phrases in your interactions? Did they make you feel invalidated or manipulated?

Digging deeper into these questions can be an essential step towards personal growth and resilience. And if you’re interested in exploring more about human behavior, relationships, and personal growth, I invite you to subscribe to my YouTube channel. Together, we can navigate this journey of understanding and growth.

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Justin Brown

Justin Brown is an entrepreneur and thought leader in personal development and digital media, with a foundation in education from The London School of Economics and The Australian National University. As the co-founder of Ideapod, The Vessel, and a director at Brown Brothers Media, Justin has spearheaded platforms that significantly contribute to personal and collective growth. His deep insights are shared on his YouTube channel, JustinBrownVids, offering a rich blend of guidance on living a meaningful and purposeful life.

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