8 phrases emotionally intelligent people use to make an instant connection

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Creating genuine connections hinges on more than just shared interests or experiences. The backbone of any authentic relationship is emotional intelligence – the ability to empathize, to listen, and to respond with care and consideration.

Emotionally intelligent individuals have a knack for establishing rapport quickly. One reason for that is they use certain phrases that instantly break down barriers and foster a sense of trust and understanding.

In this article, we’re going to explore eight phrases that emotionally intelligent people frequently use to build instant connections.

1) “I hear you”

Emotionally intelligent people understand the power of active listening. They value the perspectives of others and make it a point to show that they are truly hearing what’s being said.

One key phrase they often use is, “I hear you.” This simple statement carries a lot of weight. It reassures the other person that their words are not just falling on deaf ears, but are being taken in and considered.

Using “I hear you” doesn’t necessarily mean agreeing with the other person. Rather, it’s a sign of respect, indicating that their thoughts and feelings matter, that their voice is being heard.

Emotionally intelligent people don’t just use this phrase lightly though. They back it up with actions, demonstrating through their responses and follow-up questions that they have indeed listened and understood.

2) “Tell me more about that”

Another phrase that emotionally intelligent individuals often use is, “Tell me more about that.” It’s a simple request, yet it carries a profound message: I am interested in you and what you have to say.

By inviting further discussion, this phrase acknowledges and validates the other person’s experiences and emotions, fostering empathy and connection.

That’s not all. This phrase also helps create a safe and non-judgmental space for the individual to share more deeply, encouraging openness and trust in the relationship.

3) “How does that make you feel?”

The phrase, “How does that make you feel?” is a powerful tool for deepening connections and showing genuine interest in the emotional well-being of others.

It’s a hallmark phrase often employed by empathetic conversationalists when they want to express sincere desire to understand those they engage with.

This question invites the other person to share their emotions openly, creating an atmosphere of trust and empathy.

4) “I made a mistake”

People ranking high on emotional intelligence tend to possess a profound sense of self-awareness. They are not afraid to admit their faults and acknowledge their mistakes. 

The brilliance of the phrase “I made a mistake” lies in its humility and honesty. It showcases a willingness to acknowledge imperfection, take responsibility, and learn from errors.

Socially adept individuals understand that admitting mistakes fosters growth, strengthens relationships, and builds trust. It demonstrates maturity and a commitment to self-improvement

5) “I don’t know”

“I don’t know.” These three simple words are often the hardest to say. In a world that values knowledge and certainty, admitting to not knowing can feel like admitting to a weakness.

But the truth is, it’s a sign of strength and emotional intelligence.

Emotionally intelligent people understand that they don’t have all the answers. They are open to learning, curious, and humble enough to admit when they don’t know something. This openness to new ideas and experiences is at the heart of creativity and innovation.

By saying “I don’t know,” we make space for growth, learning, and creativity – all crucial elements in building authentic connections with others.

6) “No”

“No.” It’s a small word, but it carries enormous power. While it might seem counterproductive to building connections, emotionally intelligent people understand the importance of setting boundaries and saying no when necessary.

Emotionally intelligent individuals know that they cannot be everything to everyone. Saying yes to every request or demand can lead to burnout and resentment.

Saying no is their way of respecting their own limits and ensuring they have the energy and resources to fully engage in the commitments they do undertake.

In essence, true empowerment comes from taking full responsibility for our lives. This includes the ability to say no when something doesn’t align with our values, priorities, or capacity.  

7) “What can I do to support you?”

From my own experiences, emotionally discerning individuals are often proactive in extending support. They intuitively grasp that reciprocal assistance is vital in any relationship.

When they ask, “What can I do to support you?” it’s not just a question—it’s a heartfelt commitment to understanding and aiding.

This inquiry is a genuine offer of concrete assistance—a pledge to take meaningful action. It demonstrates their active engagement and willingness to be a reliable source of comfort or problem-solving.

When we ask how we can support others, we’re fostering a sense of community and shared responsibility, which are essential for forging meaningful connections.

8) “Let’s look at this from a different perspective”

“Let’s look at this from a different perspective” is another phrase that emotionally perceptive individuals often use.

Now, everyone has unique viewpoints and exploring these diverse perspectives can lead to deeper understanding and creative problem-solving.

Using this phrase promotes open-mindedness and constructive dialogues, shifting away from a focus on proving who’s right or wrong towards exploring various angles and possibilities.

Moreover, embracing diverse perspectives can help diffuse conflicts by encouraging understanding and compromise.

Cultivate the power of emotional intelligence

Building instant connections isn’t just about the words we say; it’s driven by our underlying emotional intelligence

Emotionally intelligent individuals understand that authentic relationships require consistent effort, vulnerability, and humility. They’re built on setting boundaries and respecting diverse perspectives.

These phrases reflect empathy, openness, and respect, fostering genuine human connections. When we use them, we’re not just speaking; we’re reaching out, heart to heart, inviting others into a space where they feel seen and valued.

It’s like saying, “I see you, I hear you, and you matter to me.” This approach can turn a simple conversation into a meaningful interaction that leaves a lasting impression.

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Justin Brown

Justin Brown is an entrepreneur and thought leader in personal development and digital media, with a foundation in education from The London School of Economics and The Australian National University. As the co-founder of Ideapod, The Vessel, and a director at Brown Brothers Media, Justin has spearheaded platforms that significantly contribute to personal and collective growth. His deep insights are shared on his YouTube channel, JustinBrownVids, offering a rich blend of guidance on living a meaningful and purposeful life.

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