Likable people are people that others naturally warm to and gravitate towards. They are the sort of people that others want to spend time around and just like for reasons they can’t quite put their fingers on.
You could say that likable people have the ability to attract other people into their lives: people are magnetized by their energy and vibe.
So what are these traits of highly likable people and how can you embody them?
1. They are genuine
Likable people are genuine. They don’t pretend to be anything but themselves; they are confident and who they are and comfortable in their skin.
They don’t feel the need to pretend to be something that they’re not.
Likable people have an air of authenticity: what you see is what you get and as time goes on and you get to know a genuine person, you realize that they’re the same person you met. In other words, they weren’t being disingenuous or trying to be something other than themselves when they first met you.
People respect and like genuine people because they are the sort to tell another person how they honestly feel and not conceal their true intentions.
With a genuine person, you know what you’re going to get – there are no nasty surprises about this person’s behavior.
Let’s look at the difference between a genuine and a disingenuous person… because there is a big difference!
Say there was a job going in a company where a genuine and disingenuous person works.
Let’s pretend these two people are at the same level professionally. Now, one role comes up in the company for a more senior position. What now?
Chances are, the genuine person is going to be open about wanting to apply for this position and they’re more likely to be transparent about the fact that they’re going to apply for the role. They would wish the other person luck in their efforts too, should they want to apply.
Meanwhile, someone who is disingenuous could be more likely to say ‘oh, no, I’m not interested in applying for that role, you’d be better suited to that than me’, yet you’ll find that they also apply for the role covertly.
Do you see the difference? A disingenuous person isn’t true to themselves or others, and, as often is the case, they’re not afraid to lie. These go against the traits of a genuine person.
2. They engage in conversation
There is nothing worse than constantly having to repeat yourself to someone – sharing things you’ve already told them more than once.
It couldn’t be more annoying than when someone constantly says that they don’t remember you mentioning something and they act surprised when you go ahead with something you told them about.
Not being a good listener is a bad trait.
On the other hand, a good trait that likable people have is actually listening to what another person has to say and engaging in the conversation.
Aside from not talking over the other person when they’re in the flow of conversation, a likable person will also engage in the conversation by asking thought-provoking questions.
They might pose questions that go deeper into the topic that the other person is talking about.
Simply put, a likable person shows an interest in another person – even if it’s not necessarily a topic that they’re super interested in. They still make the effort for another person, and they recognize that another person values their questions and engagement.
Simply put, you could say that likable people are emotionally intelligent.
3. They are not attention seekers
Likable people are not attention seekers: they do not feel the need to be the center of attention in order to feel valued.
It’s unlikely that you’ll find a likable person trying to dominate the conversation and to make it all about themselves. Think about it: do you like people that are like this?
In my experience, no one likes a show-off.
Those who feel the need to just constantly talk about how successful they are and to make everything about themselves, are not the most likable people. In fact, these people are outrightly disliked!
The people who are most liked are the ones who you can expect to gracefully thank others for any praise they get. They’re grateful for compliments and recognition and don’t use it as a chance to talk about how great they are.
What’s more, the chances are that you’ll find that likable people also champion other people around them.
Take a musician for example.
They could easily just take their award and say that they’ve put in so much work themselves and they deserve a round of applause.
However, this would not be the approach of a likable musician.
A likable figure is much more likely to thank their manager, collaborations, production team, and friends and family for making them who they are and producing the work, rather than saying that they deserve to bask in praise!
4. They are consistent
Likable people are consistent.
As I explained earlier, there are no surprises in terms of what you can expect from a genuine person.
Likable people are less likely to turn around and reveal something awful about themselves… Such as having a double life or not actually being called their name. Obviously these are extreme examples, but they happen!
Likable people are consistent from one day to the next. Naturally, our moods change from one day to the next; we can be happy-go-lucky and free-spirited one day and feeling bogged down by life the next.
This is part of life… However, a likable person doesn’t swing from one extreme to the next. They are much more consistent with how and who they are, and how they feel about their lives and where they’re at.
You could say that a likable person has a greater sense of balance, compared to someone who isn’t as likable.
5. They are accountable for their mistakes
No one is perfect; we all make mistakes.
This is just a part of life… But some people have a harder time than others admitting that they’ve gone wrong.
Likable people aren’t like this. Rather than suggesting they haven’t done anything wrong at all, likable people are more likely to put their hands up and to admit that they messed up.
They take responsibility for the things that they’ve caused to go wrong, or pain they’ve inflicted on another person – whether intentional or otherwise.
In other words, likable people are able to take things on the chin and they’re able to swallow their pride in order to do the right thing.
They’re able to say the word ‘sorry’ and mean it, and they generally want to make it up to another person if they’ve messed up.
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