Adrian Volenik
There is a never-ending shortage of people trying too hard to impress others. They boast on social media or constantly rub their achievements in our faces.
Although they are incredibly cringe-inducing to ordinary people, their behavior is often but a simple cry for help.
To anyone who has spent more than a minute thinking about it, itโs obvious these people have many underlying insecurities.
So, without delay, letโs explore them.
1) Low self-esteem
People who try too hard to impress others often suffer from low self-esteem. They have a negative self-image and struggle to recognize their own worth.
As a result, they constantly seek validation from others to feel good about themselves and rely on external praise to boost their confidence.
They rely heavily on the opinions of others to feel validated and become anxious or distressed if they sense disapproval or criticism.
Ultimately, theyโre too preoccupied with what others think of them, often assuming negative judgments or evaluations.
This anxiety can lead to stress and even curb their ability to be authentic in relationships.
But low self-esteem, more often than not, surfaces because they compare themselves to others.
2) Comparing themselves to others
Someone whoโs trying to impress other people is also constantly comparing themselves to others, which is damaging to their self-esteem.
This also makes them feel inadequate when they believe others are more successful, attractive, or accomplished, leading to a cycle of insecurity and self-doubt.
For example, when someone spends hours scrolling social media, comparing his life to the carefully curated highlight reels of influencers or even their friends.
They, too, feel pressure to showcase an idealized version of themselves online to impress others.
Or when someone constantly buys expensive things and talks about their lavish lifestyle to impress their peers. They believe having these possessions will make them more impressive and desirable to others.
3) Overcompensation
Overcompensating is a psychological defense mechanism to address underlying insecurities and feelings of inadequacy.
It involves exaggerating achievements, talents, or experiences to create a facade of success or impressiveness.
I know many people who exaggerate their job titles and responsibilities when introducing themselves.
They want others to perceive them as more successful and important than they believe they truly are.
Another good example is when someone is constantly name-dropping influential people they claim to know or have connections with.
They obviously do this in hopes that associating themselves with successful people will enhance their own image.
4) Fear of being alone
The fear of being alone is a common insecurity among people who try too hard to impress others.
The idea of being alone is deeply unsettling for them, and they go to great lengths to avoid being single.
But this fear can also originate from different underlying factors and significantly impacts their relationship behavior and choices.
5) Fear of rejection
The fear of rejection is another powerful insecurity that drives many of us to go to great lengths to avoid any situation that might lead to disapproval or abandonment.
This fear causes us to alter our behavior, beliefs, and interests to fit in with others or to gain acceptance.
To avoid rejection, people who try too hard to impress others change aspects of their personality, interests, or beliefs to fit the expectations of others.
I can understand them, as I also have this fear in certain situations.
As well as the following.
6) Difficulty being vulnerable
Vulnerability is when youโre open and honest about your feelings, thoughts, and imperfections.
But this is often diametrically opposite to the image people who try too hard to impress are trying to display.
They avoid vulnerability because they fear that showing their true emotions, flaws, or struggles will make them less impressive or weak in the eyes of others.
They need to appear flawless, and being vulnerable means admitting their imperfections, which clashes with their desire to maintain a perfect image.
7) Seeking validation through material possessions
Trying to impress others with material possessions is a way to compensate for underlying insecurities. People doing this believe that owning expensive items will make them more desirable or valuable to others.
For men, this typically means posing with luxury sports cars and expensive watches, while women are trying to impress others with extensive collections of designer clothing, handbags, and accessories.
This excessively materialistic approach to life encourages others to do so, too. It contributes to wasteful behavior thatโs harmful to our planet and the people that are doing it in the first place.
8) Over-competitiveness
People who try too hard to impress others constantly need to be the best or outdo others in every possible situation.
This insecurity is rooted in a desire to prove their worth and gain recognition, and like many others on this list, leads to strained relationships and a lack of genuine connection.
Iโve seen this in people obsessed with social media who always seek validation through likes, comments, and shares they receive on their posts.
They painstakingly curate their online presence to appear perfect and successful, fearing that anything less will result in judgment and rejection.
9) Constant self-doubt
Constant self-doubt can be crippling as people who have it struggle to trust their own judgment and abilities.
This insecurity obviously makes decision-making very challenging and causes them to look for external validation for even minor choices.
Hereโs an example I often encounter in my social circles:
Many dream of starting their own business, but their constant self-doubt holds them back.
They spend countless hours overthinking every aspect of their business plan, afraid they might fail or not be good enough as entrepreneurs.
10) People-pleasing
People-pleasers prioritize othersโ needs and desires over their own in order to gain acceptance and avoid conflict.
They have a strong need to be agreeable and avoid expressing opposite or even different opinions to avoid potential disagreements or disapproval.
To please others, people-pleasers neglect their own needs and well-being. They suppress their emotions or stop pursuing their interests to prioritize the desires of others.
11) Overemphasis on external appearance
People who try too hard to impress others put too much emphasis on external appearance.
They believe that their physical appearance is the most significant aspect of their identity, and their self-worth is tied to how others perceive them superficially.
By doing that, they constantly seek compliments and positive comments about their looks from others.
In turn, receiving compliments momentarily boosts their self-esteem and becomes an unsustainable and brief source of validation.
Ultimately, they use their appearance as a mask to hide deeper insecurities or vulnerabilities.
By presenting their flawless looks, they hope to redirect attention from their true feelings or weaknesses.
12) Difficulty saying โnoโ
Not being able to say โnoโ is driven by the fear of disappointing or upsetting others. Many people have this problem, not just people trying to impress others.
They worry that refusing requests or declining invitations might lead to negative judgments or rejection, intensifying their need for validation.
As a result, they take on more than they can handle or get involved in activities they donโt enjoy simply to maintain a favorable image.
Difficulty saying โnoโ can result from a general lack of assertiveness.
People will take advantage of you if you havenโt developed the necessary communication skills to set your boundaries effectively.
13) Fear of being forgotten
Although I donโt share this insecurity, I can tell you that it originates from a deep-seated fear of being unimportant or easily replaceable.
As a result, people who try too hard to impress others try to make a lasting impression through attention-seeking behavior.
They exaggerate their achievements, experiences, or talents to create a more impressive image of themselves.
Some resort to grand, attention-grabbing gestures to be noticed and remembered. These gestures include extravagant gifts, elaborate plans, or over-the-top actions designed to make others view them as extraordinary.
Like that Youtuber that deliberately crashed his plane for a YouTube video endangering possibly hundreds of people and their environment if the plane crashed in an inhabited area or caught on fire in the forest.
14) Identity crisis
This insecurity stems from a lack of a clear sense of self, leading people to constantly change their interests, beliefs, and behavior to fit in with different social groups.
They become social chameleons, never showing their true selves.
Above all, this behavior results in superficial relationships, a lack of fulfillment, and a persistent sense of dissatisfaction.
Like others on this list, addressing it requires introspection, self-acceptance, and willingness for genuine connections based on shared values and interests.
Final thoughts
What are your thoughts on this? Do those that eagerly try to impress others suffer from many insecurities, or is something else in play?
