People who smile to your face but secretly dislike you usually display these 10 subtle behaviours

There’s a fine line between genuine friendliness and false pretence.

Often, people who secretly dislike you will put on a friendly facade, smiling to your face while harbouring negative feelings.

Recognising these subtle signs can be tricky, but there are certain behaviours that give them away.

In this article, we’ll unravel ten subtle behaviours often exhibited by those who smile to your face but secretly dislike you. It’s not about paranoia, it’s about being perceptive. 

Let’s get started. 

1) They’re overly polite

We all appreciate politeness. It’s basic human etiquette, but there’s a difference between being genuinely courteous and being excessively polite.

People who secretly dislike you often overcompensate their true feelings with an overkill of politeness. It’s as if they’re putting on a show, masking their real emotions behind a veil of exaggerated courtesy.

You may notice that their manners feel forced or inauthentic. This behaviour is often a cover-up, a way of maintaining distance while projecting a friendly exterior.

It’s not about being overly skeptical. It’s about recognizing when politeness crosses into the territory of insincerity. 

2) They avoid eye contact

Human interaction is built on non-verbal cues and one of the most telling signs is eye contact.

I recall a colleague from my previous job, let’s call him Mark. From the outset, Mark was always friendly, always smiling. But I noticed something odd; he rarely made eye contact during our conversations.

At first, I brushed it off as shyness. But over time, I noticed he had no trouble maintaining eye contact with others. It was only with me that his gaze would frequently drift.

Despite his outward friendliness, Mark’s reluctance to maintain eye contact was a subtle hint that he wasn’t as cordial as he appeared to be. It wasn’t long before his true feelings surfaced in other ways.

3) They’re quick to criticize

It’s natural for people to offer constructive criticism. However, those harboring negative feelings towards you might seize every opportunity to point out your mistakes, often under the guise of ‘helping’ you.

Ccriticism is a defensive tactic people use when they’re not comfortable with their feelings towards someone else.

It’s a way of projecting their negative emotions onto you, instead of dealing with them internally.

4) They rarely initiate conversation

Initiating a conversation is a simple yet significant sign of genuine interest and friendliness. But those who secretly disdain you may keep their interactions with you to a minimum.

This doesn’t mean they’ll completely ignore you – that would be too obvious. Instead, they’ll wait for you to start the conversation, keeping their replies brief and non-committal.

If you’re noticing that someone always waits for you to make the first move in a conversation, it might be more than just shyness or introversion. It could be a subtle indication of their concealed feelings towards you.

5) Their body language is closed off

Body language can speak volumes about a person’s true feelings.

People who secretly dislike you may maintain a friendly facade, but their body language often betrays them. They might cross their arms, avoid facing you directly, or keep a physical distance during conversations.

These are classic signs of defensive body language, indicating discomfort or lack of trust.

If the person who’s always smiling at you also always seems to be physically closed off, it might be time to question the sincerity behind that friendly smile.

6) They’re indifferent to your victories

One of the most rewarding aspects of any relationship is the shared joy in each other’s successes. Genuine friends celebrate your victories, no matter how big or small.

But, people who secretly dislike you may not share this enthusiasm. They might offer a half-hearted congratulations or, worse, completely ignore your achievements.

If you’re sharing good news and the person merely offers a nonchalant response or tries to downplay your success, it can be quite disheartening. It’s a subtle sign that they may not hold the warm feelings they outwardly portray.

7) They interrupt you often

Communication is key in any relationship. And when that communication is constantly interrupted, it can feel disrespectful.

I remember a time when I was excitedly sharing my weekend plans with a group of friends. There was one person, always smiling and seemingly friendly, who would constantly interject, cutting me off mid-sentence to share their own stories or opinions.

It felt as though my words didn’t matter to them, that what I had to say was less important. It’s a subtle behaviour, but it’s one that can reveal a lack of respect and hidden negative feelings.

8) They’re overly agreeable

You might think that someone who constantly agrees with you is a great ally. After all, it’s nice to have your opinions validated.

However, people who secretly dislike you might use this as a strategy to keep up appearances. They may agree with everything you say, not because they genuinely share your views, but to avoid any form of conflict or real engagement.

If you notice that someone is always nodding along with your ideas without ever offering their own thoughts or challenging yours, it could be a veiled sign of their hidden feelings. So, constant agreement isn’t always as great as it seems!

9) They share your secrets

Trust is a fundamental part of any relationship. When you share personal details or secrets with someone, you expect them to respect your privacy.

However, individuals who secretly dislike you might not honor this unspoken agreement. Instead, they might use your secrets as conversation fodder with others, betraying your trust.

If you find that your private conversations are becoming public knowledge, it could be an indication that the person you confided in doesn’t hold the same level of respect for you as they outwardly display. It’s a tough realisation but an important one in understanding their true feelings towards you.

10) They never seem to have time for you

Time is one of the most valuable things we can give to another person. It’s a clear indication of our priorities and who we value in our lives.

People who secretly dislike you might always seem to be too busy to spend time with you. They might cancel plans frequently, always have an excuse at the ready, or simply not make an effort to include you in their plans.

This consistent lack of time for you, despite their friendly demeanor, could be the strongest sign that their feelings towards you aren’t as warm as their smile suggests.

Final thoughts: It’s all about perception

The key here is not to jump to conclusions, but rather to be observant and perceptive. Recognizing these subtle behaviors in people who appear friendly but may secretly dislike you is not about breeding paranoia. It’s about developing emotional intelligence and understanding the dynamics of human relationships.

American author and speaker, Dr. John C. Maxwell once said, “People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude.” This is particularly true in the context of hidden animosity. The words may be friendly, but the attitude often reveals the truth.

In the end, it’s about maintaining a sense of empathy and understanding towards others, while protecting our own emotional well-being. As complex as human behavior may be, it’s the comprehension of these intricacies that allows us to navigate our relationships more effectively.