Ever met someone who navigates life with a remarkable sense of calmness?
They keep their cool regardless of what curveballs the universe throws their way and they manage to somehow not lose their temper under pressure.
I’ve always wondered where all that serenity comes from.
Turns out, people who never worry about things out of their control often have these 7 unique strengths.
Cultivate them and you’ll never again be bothered by chaos.
1) Mindfulness
Mindfulness practices help you stay connected to the present moment, fostering a sense of clarity.
Composed people know this, so they do their best to cultivate mindfulness every chance they get.
You can do so through meditation, deep breathing, or simply by paying more attention to your surroundings and checking in with your body every once and again.
I’m never one to meditate, mostly because my thoughts go wild whenever I let them roam free.
But I try to quiet my brain whenever I do the dishes by focusing on the soapy water and how nice it feels on my hands.
I also recommend taking long walks without your phone and doing the occasional breathing exercise.
We live in an age of distraction.
When it comes to mindfulness, a little goes a long way.
2) Emotional intelligence
People who never worry about things out of their control usually possess a high degree of emotional intelligence.
It enables them to manage their emotions effectively, so they’re not consumed by anxiety when something doesn’t go according to plan.
Surprisingly, what helps me stay calm under pressure is working on my confidence.
In the past, whenever I had to face an unforeseen development, I would hyperventilate and get tunnel vision.
All I could think about would be how much worse things could get, which prevented me from taking action to improve my circumstances.
But guess what?
I always figured things out.
Having this realization made me understand that I’m more than capable of steering my way through ambiguity, even as I remain a huge fan of being in control.
Emotional intelligence starts with self-awareness.
Notice how you feel in different situations and what triggers certain emotions.
If you don’t know where to start, journaling can be incredibly helpful when looking to know yourself better.
Assess your strengths and weaknesses and be honest with yourself about what you can do to keep a level head under pressure.
Perhaps you can focus on visualizing success, or on staying organized, or on breaking seemingly impossible tasks into smaller ones.
Whatever works for you.
3) Adaptability
Flexibility is a key strength of those who don’t worry about things beyond their control.
They embrace change as an inevitable part of life and tweak their perspective accordingly.
As I’ve already mentioned, I love control, so embracing change used to be a foreign concept. I’m a huge fan of my comfort zone.
Then I experienced such painful growing pains in my twenties that I had no choice but to adapt.
Along the way, I’ve learned a few tactics that helped me:
- Setting more realistic goals for myself
- Coming up with a plan B to resort to in case plan A fails miserably
- Building a solid support system that can raise me up when life has me down
- Prioritizing self-care so that I can find the resources to forge ahead in the face of obstacles
- Celebrating each and every success to keep momentum
Perhaps they will work for you, too.
4) Resilience
Speaking of obstacles, resilience is another unique strength of people who never worry about things out of their control.
Instead of dwelling on what went wrong, they channel their energy into finding solutions.
This helps them bounce back from setbacks and acclimate to new circumstances swiftly.
When it comes to resilience, your best bet is to work on your problem-solving skills.
If a bump in the road comes up, stop letting your brain dwell on how much of an inconvenience it is.
Don’t throw yourself a pity party and wallow in misery.
Instead, use your little grey cells to come up with a creative solution for the problem at hand.
Maybe you can tackle the obstacle head-on, or you can take a detour that will eventually get you back on track.
Whichever option you choose, trust yourself that you’ve got this.
Panic never got anyone anywhere.
That brings me to my next point.
5) Optimism
People who never worry about things out of their control are often optimists.
They believe in the inherent goodness of the world and the potential for better outcomes, even during challenging times.
Granted, this can be difficult in the face of – gestures vaguely – everything going on at the moment.
If you’ve opened a news app in the last few years, you probably felt overwhelmed by negativity, and for good reason.
Personally, I’ve spent an embarrassing amount of time curled up in the fetal position, wondering if I wouldn’t be better off running into the woods and leaving civilization behind.
However, as depressing as this epiphany may be, there likely isn’t a lot *you* can do to lower the cost of living, stop wars, or curb climate change.
What you can do is try to find meaning in the right now, and surround yourself with loved ones who understand and support you.
Plus, you can embrace the final two points on the list.
6) Gratitude
Gratitude means appreciating the blessings in your life, no matter how small, and redirecting your attention to what you have rather than what you lack.
It’s a common practice among people who never worry about things out of their control.
Take stock of everything going well at the moment.
Do you have a roof over your head, food in your fridge, someone to call when you want to complain about life’s many indignities?
Then you’re already luckier than a lot of people.
Don’t lose sight of that.
Keep a gratitude journal and find something positive to highlight every day.
It will make a world of difference.
7) Self-compassion
People who aren’t as fazed about uncertainty tend to extend themselves a solid amount of self-compassion.
Not only do they recognize their limitations but they treat themselves with understanding, especially when life doesn’t go their way.
You can do your best to develop every single one of the traits on this list, and there will still be moments when you feel defeated.
When they come, it’s crucial not to beat yourself too much about it.
Your support system will help, but you also need to be your biggest cheerleader.
Talking down to yourself and ripping yourself apart for simply being human isn’t a productive technique to conquer hardship.
Cutting yourself some slack, meanwhile?
It’s the only way to persevere.
Bottom line
If you’re keen to embrace a similar mindset, it’s never too late to develop coping mechanisms to deal with uncertainty.
Mindfulness, gratitude, and a positive outlook go a long way toward helping you stay calm when things get out of hand.
Plot twists happen regardless of how obsessively you plan.
Accepting this uncomfortable truth makes you more likely to remain composed amid the turbulence.