Adrian Volenik
I think we can all agree that making a good first impression is important, right? That’s why most of us pay attention to what we’re doing when we’re meeting someone for the first time.
The ideal things you can do is to maintain eye contact, offer a firm handshake, have a good posture, and not be nervous.
But many out there fail to do these simple yet important things. They then wonder why they can’t impress people they meet.
So, to learn from their missteps, let’s discover what body language mistakes people who make a terrible first impression often make.
1) Avoiding eye contact
Maintaining eye contact is one of the most important things you can do when meeting someone for the first time.
If you want to leave an impression of a confident and trustworthy person, you better look them straight in their eyes.
When you don’t do that, it makes you seem unsure or uninterested. You also need to find a middle ground – too much eye contact can be intense, but too little might make you seem distant.
But I understand it can be uncomfortable for many of you to keep looking someone directly in the eyes.
That’s why you can look at the root of their nose. To them, it will seem like you’re looking into their eyes, and for you, it will be less uncomfortable, too.
2) Crossing arms
One mistake I keep catching myself making is crossing my arms. It’s come to the point that I’m very self-conscious about it.
But why is that such a big deal?
Well, crossed arms make you look closed off and unfriendly. Even if they don’t pick up on it consciously, they will subconsciously.
Next time you’re talking to people, keep your arms relaxed at your sides to seem more open and approachable.
Even if you don’t feel that comfortable in that situation, try resisting the urge to cross your arms.
3) Nervous habits
Sometimes, when people feel uneasy or anxious, they start doing things like tapping their foot or playing with their hair without realizing it.
These are called nervous habits. Imagine meeting someone new and they’re fidgeting a lot – it would make the conversation feel a bit off, wouldn’t it?
Moving around a lot can also make one look nervous or not fully present.
The key is being aware of these habits and finding ways to manage them. It’s not about pretending to be someone else but making sure your nerves don’t take the spotlight.
Taking a deep breath or finding a way to stay calm can help you seem more composed and confident, even if you’re feeling a bit jittery.
4) Checking phone
Phones are like extensions of our bodies at this point. Most people I see are glued to them.
My wife had to jump into a pool yesterday with her clothes on when a kid started struggling. She was the only parent who wasn’t on her phone while the kids were playing in the pool.
For context, the pool has no lifeguard, and the kids were messing around while waiting for their swimming instructor.
This made me wonder how many people die or get hurt every year because of these damn things.
But let me get back to the topic. Glancing at your phone during a chat suggests you’re not focused and you don’t care about the person or the topic of conversation.
So, keep your phone away to show you actually value them.
5) Weak handshake
A weak handshake is like a limp noodle – it lacks the strength and energy that a handshake should communicate.
When your handshake is weak, it sends the message that you’re unsure of yourself or not fully engaged in the interaction.
Picture yourself meeting someone new. Instead of a firm handshake, they give you a weak one. This makes you wonder if they’re confident or assertive. I would also wonder if they’re living under a rock.
In fact, you probably don’t even have to imagine it. You can just recall one of the many times it has happened. I know I can!
6) Lack of smiling
When you meet someone new, not offering a smile can create an immediate sense of distance.
A smile is like a social handshake; it conveys warmth and friendliness. When you don’t smile, it might be interpreted as:
- Disinterest,
- Unfriendliness,
- Nervousness.
Picture this: you walk into a room, and someone looks your way but doesn’t crack a smile. It can leave you wondering if they’re approachable or open to conversation.
On the flip side, a genuine smile can instantly put you at ease. It’s a non-verbal cue that says, “Hey, I’m friendly, and I’m happy to be here.”
7) Ignoring personal space
This is like stepping into someone’s bubble without an invitation. When you invade someone’s personal space, you make them uncomfortable and send off vibes of being too forward or even invasive.
On the other hand, if you keep your distance, it might make you appear distant or disinterested.
Imagine meeting someone for the first time, and they stand so close that you can practically count their nose hairs. That’s a personal space invasion.
And then there’s someone who keeps stepping back every time you approach. It feels like they’re actively avoiding you.
8) Ignoring personal grooming
If you want to make a bad first impression, simply ignore your personal grooming. If your clothes are messy, your hair looks unkempt, or you have a not-so-pleasant smell, what does that say about you?
It makes others think you don’t care much about how you present yourself or, even worse, that you’re a manchild or someone who doesn’t go out of their house a lot.
Taking care of your appearance matters. Good hygiene and looking polished show that you respect yourself and others.
It’s a relatively small thing, but it can make a big difference in the impression you leave on others.
9) Interrupting
Constantly cutting off others is rude. Let people finish what they’re saying before you respond – it shows respect.
Otherwise, when you interrupt, it makes people feel like you don’t care about what they’re saying or that you think your ideas are more important.
Why is it a problem? Well, it stops them from saying what they want to say, and it can make you seem impatient, like you don’t want to wait for your turn.
This impatience makes you look self-centered like you only care about your own opinions.
Plus, interrupting messes with the flow of the conversation. It can make things confusing and uncomfortable for everyone.
To avoid this and make a better first impression, try to listen more. Let others finish talking before you start.
10) Negative facial expressions
When we talk about negative facial expressions, we’re referring to those moments when our face unintentionally expresses disapproval, frustration, or impatience.
This can include rolling your eyes, sighing heavily, or showing a generally displeased expression.
They can make people feel uncomfortable, unwelcome, or even defensive. Being mindful of your facial expressions is important because they influence how others see you.
By using positive facial expressions, you can make interactions more meaningful and positive.
11) Poor posture
Lastly, poor posture can send the wrong signals right from the start. When you slouch or hunch over, it makes you seem less confident or even uninterested.
Imagine meeting someone who’s all slouched – it gives off this vibe like they’d rather be anywhere else.
Good posture, on the other hand, makes you look more put together and engaged. Standing up straight or sitting with your back aligned not only gives the impression of confidence but also shows that you’re paying attention.
Plus, it’s a small tweak that can make a big difference. You don’t need to look like a military officer. Just stand relaxed yet attentive. This shows others that you’re ready to interact.
