People who can never seem to make good habits stick almost always display these 8 behaviors

We all strive to build good habits, but why is it that some of us just can’t seem to make them stick?

As the founder of Hack Spirit, I’ve come across countless people who struggle with this very issue.

But here’s the interesting thing; There’s a pattern I’ve noticed among those who find it difficult to cultivate and maintain positive habits.

In my observations, those who consistently struggle with forming good habits almost always display eight distinct behaviors.

In this article, we’ll uncover eight common behaviors that sabotage your efforts to create lasting habits—and, more importantly, how to overcome them.

1) They lack clear goals

In my experience, one of the biggest roadblocks to forming good habits is a lack of clear, defined goals.

People who struggle with habit formation often have a vague idea of what they want to achieve but no concrete plan on how to get there. “I want to be healthier” or “I want to be more organized” are common examples of this.

While these are great aspirations, they aren’t exactly goals.

Without a clear goal, it’s easy to lose focus and motivation. This is because the brain needs clarity and direction to work effectively towards a target.

Setting clear, specific, and achievable goals helps guide your actions and gives you a sense of purpose. It’s much easier to stick with a habit when you know exactly why you’re doing it and what you hope to achieve.

In fact, research suggests that goal setting can significantly increase your chances of success when trying to form new habits.

So if you’re finding it hard to make good habits stick, take a moment to consider your goals. Are they clear? Are they specific?

If not, it might be time to revisit them. 

2) They try to change too much at once

Another common trait among people who struggle to make good habits stick is trying to change too much at once.

The excitement of starting a new habit often leads to an overzealous attempt to overhaul several areas of life simultaneously.

This approach, however, is rarely effective. It’s overwhelming and can lead to burnout.

Changing habits is a task that requires focus, energy, and willpower. By spreading these resources thin across multiple changes, you’re setting yourself up for failure.

Instead, it’s more effective to focus on one habit at a time. Once that habit becomes second nature, you can then move on to the next one.

By compartmentalizing your efforts, you’re more likely to stick with your new routine and make the change permanent. This approach also helps build confidence and momentum as you rack up small wins along the way.

3) They don’t make habits a priority

This is something I’ve seen time and time again. People say they want to establish new habits, but when push comes to shove, these new habits always seem to fall by the wayside.

Why does this happen?

Because they’re not making their new habits a priority.

It’s easy to say you want to start exercising, eat healthier, or wake up earlier. But when you’re tired, busy, or stressed, these new habits are often the first thing to go.

If you’re serious about making a habit stick, it needs to be non-negotiable. It has to be as important as any other crucial activity in your life.

Personally, when I wanted to make meditation a part of my daily routine, I had to prioritize it. I set a specific time each day for meditation and treated it as an essential appointment.

This not only helped me stick with the habit but also made the experience more enjoyable and rewarding.

4) They lack mental toughness

In my work at Hack Spirit, I’ve found that a key characteristic of people who struggle with forming good habits is a lack of mental toughness.

Mental toughness is the ability to persevere in the face of difficulties and challenges. It’s about having the resilience to keep going, even when things get tough.

When it comes to building new habits, there will inevitably be obstacles and setbacks. Without mental toughness, it’s easy to give up at the first sign of difficulty.

Building mental toughness is something I’ve personally focused on throughout my life. It’s been a game-changer, not only for habit formation but for all aspects of my life.

In fact, I wrote a book on this topic, The Art of Resilience: A Practical Guide to Developing Mental Toughness.

In it, I share my personal journey and provide practical tips and strategies to help you develop your own mental toughness. It’s a resource I wish I had when I started my journey and I’m confident it can help you too.

Without mental toughness, sticking to new habits can be a real challenge. But with it, you’ll be equipped to overcome any obstacle that stands in your way.

5) They don’t allow for imperfection

Here’s something you might not expect: Perfectionism can actually hinder habit formation.

Many people who struggle to form good habits hold themselves to an all-or-nothing standard. They believe that if they can’t do it perfectly, they shouldn’t do it at all.

This mindset is incredibly limiting. It sets unrealistic expectations and leaves no room for the inevitable mistakes and setbacks that come with trying something new.

The truth is, no one is perfect. We all have off days. We all slip up. And that’s okay.

It’s crucial to allow room for imperfection when trying to form a new habit.

If you miss a day of exercise, or eat an unhealthy meal, it doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It just means you’re human.

Rather than throwing in the towel at the first sign of imperfection, use it as a learning experience. Understand what led to the slip-up and how you can prevent it from happening again in the future.

6) They don’t have a support system

Having a support system in place can make a world of difference when trying to form new habits. Yet, many people who struggle with habit formation attempt to go it alone.

Whether it’s a workout buddy, a mentor, or a supportive friend, having someone who understands your goals and encourages your progress can significantly boost your chances of success.

A strong support system provides accountability, motivation, and guidance. It can also make the process of habit formation more enjoyable.

If you’re trying to form a new habit and finding it difficult, consider enlisting the help of others. Share your goals with them and ask for their support.

You might be surprised at how much easier it becomes to stick with your new habits when you have others cheering you on.

7) They don’t visualize their success

When I first started Hack Spirit, I learned quickly that visualizing success is an integral part of achieving goals and forming new habits.

People who struggle with habit formation often overlook the power of visualization. They focus on the process of the habit, but not on the end result.

Visualization is a powerful tool that has been scientifically proven to increase confidence and performance. It allows you to see yourself achieving your goals and experiencing the benefits of your new habits.

This mental image can serve as a powerful motivator, pushing you to stick with your habits even when things get tough.

When I was trying to make exercise a daily habit, I didn’t just think about the act of exercising. I visualized myself feeling healthier, having more energy, and being proud of my commitment to my health.

This simple practice made a huge difference in my motivation and resilience. I encourage you to try it if you’re struggling to make your good habits stick.

8) They don’t reward themselves

Lastly, one common behavior I’ve noticed among people who find it hard to stick with good habits is that they rarely reward themselves for their progress.

Building new habits can be challenging, and it’s important to acknowledge your hard work and dedication.

Research shows that rewards provide positive reinforcement, making the habit-forming process more enjoyable and motivating.

These rewards don’t have to be extravagant.

They could be as simple as taking a few minutes to relax with a good book after a workout, or treating yourself to your favorite coffee after a productive day of work.

Incorporating rewards into your habit-forming process can make a significant difference in your motivation levels and overall success.

So don’t forget to celebrate your progress, no matter how small it may seem. Every step forward is a victory worth acknowledging.

Final thoughts

Forming new habits isn’t always easy, but understanding these behaviors can provide valuable insight into where you might be going wrong.

By recognizing and addressing these behaviors, you’ll be better equipped to stick with your good habits and achieve your goals.

I you’re interested in developing the mental toughness that can help you overcome any obstacle in your way, I invite you to check out my book, The Art of Resilience: A Practical Guide to Developing Mental Toughness.

In it, I share my personal journey and provide practical tips and strategies to help build your resilience and mental toughness.

I truly believe these skills can make a world of difference in your ability to form and maintain good habits.