People who become more assertive and confident as they get older tend to adopt these 7 habits

“With age comes wisdom.” 

That’s a quote we’ve all heard of, but let me add something more to that:

With age often comes a strong sense of confidence and assertiveness.

I know it sounds cheesy, but it’s actually true!

Now, you might be thinking, “That’s great, but how do I get there?”

The good news is that these habits aren’t exclusive to a chosen few. Anyone can adopt them at any point in life.


Well, stick around because I’m about to share with you some of those habits that can transform you into a more assertive, confident version of yourself as you grow older.

So, let’s dive right in!

1) Embracing self-love and self-acceptance

It may sound cliché, but it all starts with loving and accepting yourself.

As we age, we tend to become more forgiving of our flaws and imperfections. We start to understand that everyone’s fighting their own battles, and nobody’s perfect—not even close.

This realization empowers us.

It shifts our focus from seeking external validation to nurturing self-love. We start to understand our worth and stop letting others dictate our value.

You see, when you genuinely love and accept yourself, you naturally become more confident and assertive. You’re no longer afraid to express your opinion or stand up for what you believe in.

Because you know your worth, and nothing or no one can take that away from you.

2) Setting healthy boundaries

Call it a life lesson or a survival skill, but setting boundaries is something I’ve learned to do as I’ve gotten older.

Let’s take my work-life balance as an example.

Back in the day, I used to find it hard to say ‘no’. I’d take on extra tasks, work overtime, and even bring work home. I was constantly stressed and overwhelmed.

But then, I realized something.

I understood that saying ‘yes’ to everything was saying ‘no’ to my own peace and well-being.

So, I started setting boundaries.

I made it clear to my colleagues that my personal time was off-limits. I started taking lunch breaks away from my desk. I stopped checking emails after office hours.

And guess what?

It worked wonders for my mental health and overall productivity. And in the process, I became more assertive and confident.

And this didn’t just apply to my professional life, but to my personal relationships too.

Setting boundaries is all about respect—for yourself and for others. And when you respect yourself, you naturally develop higher levels of confidence and assertiveness.

3) Being unapologetically yourself

I’ve spent a significant part of my life trying to fit into molds created by society, family, and even friends.

You know, always trying to be the ‘perfect’ daughter, the ‘ideal’ friend, the ‘model’ employee.

But the harder I tried, the further I drifted from my authentic self.

And then, one fine day, it hit me. I realized that in trying to please everyone around me, I was losing myself.

So, I decided to change.

I decided to be me—boldly and unapologetically.

Did people raise eyebrows? Absolutely.

Did I lose a few friends along the way? Yes.

But you know what? It was worth it.

Because with every mask that fell off, I felt lighter. More in control. More assertive. And definitely more confident.

Being authentic means being honest with yourself and others about who you are, what you want, and how you feel.

And trust me when I say this—there’s nothing more empowering than standing tall in your truth.

After all, we owe it to ourselves to live our lives on our own terms, not as per someone else’s expectations or standards.

4) Cultivating a growth mindset

One of the most transformative habits I’ve developed over the years is cultivating a growth mindset.

What does that mean?

Well, it’s about embracing challenges as opportunities to learn and grow rather than viewing them as roadblocks.

It’s about believing in your capacity to develop new skills over time instead of sticking to the notion that our abilities are fixed.

And let me tell you, this shift in perspective has been a game-changer for me.

I started seeing failures not as dead ends but as steppingstones towards success. I began to view criticism as constructive feedback rather than personal attacks.

And you know what? This mindset made me more resilient, confident, and assertive.

I was no longer afraid to take risks or step out of my comfort zone. I was more open to feedback and less defensive about my shortcomings. I was assertive in pursuing what I wanted, knowing that every setback was just another opportunity to learn and grow.

5) Practicing mindfulness

Here’s something you might not know:

An article from The Harvard Gazette found that people spend almost 47% of their waking hours thinking about something other than what they’re doing. And this typically makes them unhappy.

Now, imagine being present in the moment, fully engaged in whatever you’re doing. Sounds blissful, doesn’t it?

That’s what mindfulness is all about.

It’s about paying attention to your thoughts, feelings, and environment without judgment. It’s about acknowledging your emotions without letting them control you.

As I’ve grown older, I’ve made mindfulness a part of my daily routine. It’s amazing how this simple practice has helped me become more assertive and confident.

Why? Because mindfulness has taught me to respond rather than react. I’m more aware of my emotions and can manage them better, leading to more assertive communication and decision-making.

Plus, being present in the moment nurtures inner peace and self-assurance, as you’re not fretting about the past or anxious about the future.

6) Showing compassion to oneself and others

We’re often our own harshest critics, aren’t we?

But what if we treated ourselves with the same kindness and compassion that we extend to others?

As I’ve grown older, I’ve learned to be more gentle with myself. I’ve learned to acknowledge my efforts, celebrate my small victories, and forgive myself for my mistakes.

And this, in turn, has made me more confident and assertive.

You see, when you’re kind to yourself, you develop a strong sense of self-worth. You start believing in your abilities and standing up for yourself.

But that’s not all.

I’ve also found that showing compassion towards others has made me more assertive.

It’s encouraged me to voice my concerns when I see someone being treated unfairly. It’s given me the courage to speak up for those who can’t. It’s made me realize that assertiveness isn’t just about standing up for oneself but also about standing up for others.

So remember, being kind and compassionate doesn’t make you weak. On the contrary, it’s a strength that fosters confidence and assertiveness.

7) Adopting a lifelong learning attitude

If there’s one thing I’d want you to take away from this, it’s this: Never stop learning.

As we grow older, it’s easy to fall into the rut of complacency. But those who remain curious and open-minded, those who continue to learn and grow—they’re the ones who truly shine.

This lifelong learning attitude has been a cornerstone of my journey towards becoming more confident and assertive.

I’ve learned to embrace new experiences, seek new knowledge, and acquire new skills. It’s kept me adaptable and resilient in the face of change.

And the more I’ve learned, the more confident I’ve become.

Because with each new skill or piece of knowledge, I’ve felt more capable and empowered.

Final thoughts

If these habits resonate with you, congratulations! You’re already on the path towards becoming more assertive and confident as you grow older.

But remember, change is a constant journey, not a one-time destination.

Each habit takes time to cultivate and integrate into your life. It’s not about instant transformation, but gradual growth.

At the end of the day, it’s never too late to become the person you’ve always wanted to be.

Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair is a former competitive athlete who transitioned into the world of wellness and mindfulness. Her journey through the highs and lows of competitive sports has given her a unique perspective on resilience and mental toughness. Ava’s writing reflects her belief in the power of small, daily habits to create lasting change.

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