People who are really difficult to be around often display these 8 behaviors (without realizing it)

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Ever been around someone who unknowingly turns the simplest interactions into a delicate tightrope walk? We’ve all encountered those individuals with behaviors that create an invisible barrier, making social interactions more challenging than they have to be.  

In this article, we’ll dive into 8 behaviors exhibited by people who – bless their hearts – may not realize they’re making their relationships feel more like a battlefield than a playground.

Without further ado, let’s jump right in.

1) They’re constantly negative

Negativity can take many forms, from constant complaining to frequent criticizing.

People who are really difficult to be around often have a knack for viewing the glass as perpetually half empty.

It’s not just about being pessimistic, though. It’s about spreading that pessimism like a contagious disease, until it starts affecting everyone around them.

If you find yourself feeling drained or down after interacting with them, it’s a clear sign of their negativity impacting you.

2) They never acknowledge their own flaws

Here’s something I’ve learned the hard way: no one is perfect.

But dealing with someone who refuses to accept this universal truth about themselves can be draining.

These people are typically the ones who put the blame on others, deflecting any responsibility for their actions. It’s always someone else’s fault, not theirs.

Whenever a discussion or argument arises, they’re quick to point fingers and slow to look in the mirror.

In my experience, such behavior only leads to more conflict and less understanding. It’s definitely not a healthy foundation for any relationship.

3) They don’t respect boundaries

I once had a friend who always seemed to cross the line when it came to my personal space.

It started with small things, like borrowing my things without asking or showing up at my place unannounced. Over time, it escalated to more serious breaches like reading my personal messages or making decisions on my behalf.

It felt like they didn’t understand the concept of personal boundaries, or worse, chose to ignore them.

In any relationship, mutual respect for each other’s space and privacy is crucial. People who disregard this often make others uncomfortable and uneasy around them.

Looking back, I realize that their intrusive behavior was a major red flag I should have addressed earlier.

4) They’re always the victim

In psychology, there’s a term called the victim mentality. It’s when someone tends to view themselves as a victim of the negative actions of others, even in the absence of clear evidence.

This mindset can be really hard to be around. People with a victim mentality often refuse to take responsibility for their actions and instead, they blame others for their misfortunes.

The world is always out to get them and they’re the perpetual innocent party. It’s an exhausting cycle that leaves little room for growth or change, making interactions with them increasingly difficult over time.

5) They’re overly critical

I’m sure we can all agree that constructive criticism is beneficial. It helps us grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves. But there’s a fine line between being helpful and being hurtful.

Some people have a tendency to constantly critique others. Whether it’s your choice of clothing, your taste in music, or your career decisions, they always have something to say. Their words tend to be more discouraging than encouraging, more destructive than constructive.

It feels like they’re always looking for faults, never appreciating the good. This can make even the simplest interactions with them a draining experience. Remember, everyone has their own path and no one has the right to incessantly judge another’s journey.

6) They struggle with empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s what connects us as human beings and allows for deeper, more meaningful relationships.

However, some people seem to have a hard time tapping into this essential human trait. They struggle to put themselves in your shoes, to feel what you feel. Their world revolves around their own experiences and feelings, with little room left for anyone else’s.

This can make conversations with them feel one-sided and superficial. It’s like you’re talking to a brick wall, with your feelings and experiences bouncing off without being absorbed or acknowledged.

This lack of empathy can make them really difficult to be around, especially when you’re in need of understanding and comfort.

7) They’re always right

We’ve all met those people who act like they’re the smartest person in the room. They have an opinion about everything and they’re never wrong, at least in their own eyes.

These individuals can be really difficult to interact with. It’s hard to have a meaningful conversation with someone who isn’t open to different perspectives or willing to admit when they’re wrong.

Debates with them quickly turn into battles, with the ultimate goal being not to understand or learn, but to prove themselves right. This stubbornness and lack of humility can make them really hard to be around, and it often leads to unnecessary tension and conflict.

It’s important to remember that everyone has something valuable to share and we can all learn from each other. No one person has all the answers.

8) They never apologize

I believe one of the most crucial aspects of any relationship is the ability to apologize when you’re wrong. It shows maturity, humility, and respect for the other person’s feelings.

However, some people seem to view apologizing as a sign of weakness. They’d rather justify their actions or shift the blame than admit they were wrong.

This can be incredibly frustrating and hurtful, especially when you’re on the receiving end. It often leads to unresolved conflicts, growing resentment, and a breakdown of trust.

In my view, someone who can’t apologize is someone who values their pride over your feelings. And honestly, that’s not someone you want in your life.

Wrapping it up

Recognizing these behaviors in others can be a tough pill to swallow, especially when the person is close to you. It’s never easy to acknowledge that someone you care about might be difficult to be around.

But remember, self-preservation is not selfishness. It’s okay to distance yourself from people who drain your energy or undermine your peace of mind. You’re not obliged to set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

The real challenge lies in spotting these behaviors in ourselves. The first step towards change is awareness. So if you’ve noticed any of these traits in your own behavior, don’t beat yourself up.

We’re all human and we all make mistakes.

The key is to learn from them and strive for growth. Open yourself up to feedback, practice empathy, respect boundaries, and always be willing to apologize when you’re wrong.

Lost Your Sense of Purpose?

In this age of information overload and pressure to meet others’ expectations, many struggle to connect with their core purpose and values. It’s easy to lose your inner compass.

Jeanette Brown created this free values discovery PDF to help clarify your deepest motivations and beliefs. As an experienced life coach and self-improvement teacher, Jeanette guides people through major transitions by realigning them with their principles.

Her uniquely insightful values exercises will illuminate what inspires you, what you stand for, and how you aim to operate. This serves as a refreshing filter to tune out societal noise so you can make choices rooted in what matters most to you.

With your values clearly anchored, you’ll gain direction, motivation and the compass to navigate decisions from your best self – rather than fleeting emotion or outside influences.

Stop drifting without purpose. Rediscover what makes you come alive with Jeanette Brown’s values clarity guide.

 

Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham, based in Auckland, writes about the psychology behind everyday decisions and life choices. His perspective is grounded in the belief that understanding oneself is the key to better decision-making. Lucas’s articles are a mix of personal anecdotes and observations, offering readers relatable and down-to-earth advice.

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