People who are great at small talk always use these 9 clever phrases

There’s an art to small talk that some people just seem to naturally possess. They effortlessly engage in chit-chat and leave the conversation with a new friend or a great impression.

Mastering small talk isn’t about being deceptive or playing mind games. It’s about connecting with others genuinely while keeping the conversation light and interesting.

The secret to their success? A few clever phrases that they keep up their sleeves.

In this article, we’ll reveal the 9 phrases that people who are great at small talk always use. These phrases can help you turn small talk into big connections.

Let’s dive in.

1) “How’s your day going?”

In the world of small talk, the ability to initiate conversation is crucial. It’s your first step towards building a connection.

People who excel in small talk know that starting off with a simple, open-ended question like “How’s your day going?” can set the tone for a relaxed, casual conversation.

This isn’t about digging into personal details or prying into someone’s life. It’s about showing genuine interest and providing an opportunity for the other person to share.

Small talk isn’t just about filling silence. It’s about connecting on a human level and creating a comfortable environment for conversation.

When you’re in a situation where small talk is the order of the day, give this phrase a try. You might be surprised at how easily the conversation flows from there.

2) “That reminds me of the time when…”

Being good at small talk isn’t just about asking questions, it’s also about sharing a bit of yourself. This helps create a two-way connection, which is the essence of a good conversation.

A phrase I often use is, “That reminds me of the time when…” This phrase works like magic because it narrows down the conversation to a specific topic that both parties can relate to.

For instance, if someone mentions they recently went hiking, I might say, “That reminds me of the time when I hiked up Mount Kilimanjaro. The view from the top was breathtaking.”

Not only does this provide an opportunity for me to share my experiences, but it also opens up the conversation for them to delve deeper into their own hiking experiences. It’s all about creating a sense of relatability and shared experiences.

3) “Did you know…”

A phrase that can inject life into any conversation is, “Did you know…” This phrase is a great way to share knowledge or introduce a new topic into the conversation.

For instance, if you are having a conversation about coffee, you could say, “Did you know that coffee was originally chewed? Apparently, the first African tribes to consume coffee did so by grinding the berries together, adding in some animal fat, and rolling these caffeinated treats into tiny edible energy balls.”

This not only adds an intriguing element to the conversation but also opens up new avenues for discussion. It’s a clever way to keep the conversation flowing while sharing something of value.

4) “I couldn’t help but notice…”

Observation is a powerful tool in small talk. It provides an opportunity to shift the conversation towards the other person in a non-intrusive way.

Using the phrase “I couldn’t help but notice…” allows you to bring up something you’ve observed about your conversation partner or your surroundings.

For instance, if they’re wearing a unique piece of jewellery, you could say, “I couldn’t help but notice your necklace. It’s very unique. Can I ask where you got it?”

This shows that you’re paying attention to them and are interested in knowing more. It’s a subtle compliment that can make the other person feel good and more open to continuing the conversation.

5) “What’s the story behind…?”

Another great phrase for striking up a conversation is, “What’s the story behind…?” This question is a genuine way to show interest in the other person’s experiences or possessions.

For example, if someone has an interesting phone case, you could ask, “What’s the story behind your phone case?” This invites them to share a personal anecdote or experience, which can lead to more engaging discussions.

Remember, the aim of small talk is to find common ground and establish a connection. By asking about the story behind something, you’re encouraging a deeper conversation where both parties can learn more about each other.

6) “I really admire how you…”

People who excel at small talk know the power of genuine compliments. They can make the other person feel valued and appreciated, fostering a positive atmosphere for conversation.

The phrase, “I really admire how you…” is a fantastic way to express admiration for someone’s skills, achievements, or character traits. It doesn’t just acknowledge their accomplishments but also provides a window into your values and what you appreciate in people.

For example, you might say, “I really admire how you handled that difficult client with such patience and professionalism.” This not only makes the other person feel good but also reinforces their positive actions.

Sincerity is key. Compliments should always come from a place of genuine respect and admiration. When used correctly, they can be a powerful tool for building rapport and deepening connections.

7) “I’ve always struggled with…”

While small talk is often light and surface-level, there’s no rule that says it can’t delve a little deeper. Sharing a struggle or a challenge you’ve faced can humanize you and invite the other person to share their own experiences.

For instance, I might say, “I’ve always struggled with public speaking. It’s something I’m working on, but it still makes me nervous every time.”

This admission shows that you’re not perfect and you’re willing to work on your weaknesses. It can also make the other person feel more comfortable sharing their own challenges, creating a stronger bond in the conversation.

8) “I’m curious about…”

Curiosity is a powerful tool in communication. Expressing genuine interest in the other person’s hobbies, work, or experiences can lead to a deeper, more meaningful conversation.

Using the phrase “I’m curious about…” shows that you are interested in learning more about a specific aspect of their life or the topic at hand.

For example, if you’re talking to someone who is a chef, you might say, “I’m curious about how you come up with new recipes. Is it more of an experimental process or do you draw inspiration from somewhere?”

This invites the other person to share more insight and can lead to a fascinating conversation that goes beyond the realm of typical small talk. It’s a great way to show genuine interest and foster a deeper connection.

9) “I’ve really enjoyed talking with you.”

This phrase might seem simple, but its impact is powerful. Expressing that you’ve enjoyed the conversation validates the time spent together and leaves a lasting, positive impression.

Saying “I’ve really enjoyed talking with you” is more than just a polite exit phrase. It shows appreciation for the other person’s time and contributions to the conversation, and it leaves the door open for future interactions.

Remember, small talk isn’t just about what you say during the conversation, but also how you end it. Leaving on a positive note can be the key to turning small talk into a meaningful connection.

Just remember: It’s all about connection

Delving into the art of small talk, it becomes clear that it’s not just about filling silence or passing time. It’s about creating connections, building bridges, and opening doors to deeper discussions.

The phrases mentioned in this article aren’t magic words to be said in a specific order or context; they are tools to help you navigate conversations comfortably and effortlessly.

Whether it’s showing genuine interest with “I’m curious about…”, sharing a bit of yourself with “That reminds me of the time when…”, or leaving a lasting impression with “I’ve really enjoyed talking with you”, these phrases can help steer your small talk in a meaningful direction.

Ultimately, the art of small talk is a dance of words, where each step is taken with the intent of bringing you closer to your conversation partner. It’s about being present, being genuine, and most importantly, being human.

Remember, every great conversation started as small talk. So, the next time you find yourself in a chit-chat scenario, use these phrases as your guide. You never know where the conversation might lead.