People who are exhausting to be around usually display these 8 behaviors (without realizing it)

Interacting with others can sometimes feel like a draining experience. Why? Well, there are people who, without realizing it, exhibit certain behaviors that can make them exhausting to be around.

These behaviors are often subtle, and the person displaying them may not even be aware of their impact. But for those on the receiving end, they can turn a pleasant conversation into a tiresome ordeal.

In this article, we’ll explore the 8 common behaviors that can unintentionally sap your energy. Recognizing these patterns may help you navigate social interactions more effectively and maintain your sanity in the process. So, brace yourself; it’s time to dive in!

1) Constant negativity

We’ve all had encounters with individuals that seem to have a dark cloud constantly hanging over their heads. These are people who, regardless of the situation, are perpetually negative.

Negativity is contagious and can quickly turn an otherwise pleasant interaction into a downer. This isn’t to say that everyone should be relentlessly positive all the time – that would be unrealistic and, frankly, annoying. But there’s a difference between someone who occasionally vents or expresses frustration and someone who sees the glass as perpetually half empty.

These individuals usually don’t realize how their negativity impacts those around them. They might view their pessimism as being realistic or pragmatic, but it can be draining for others.

Recognizing this behavior can help you understand why certain interactions leave you feeling emotionally depleted. It’s not necessarily about avoiding these individuals but about managing your exposure to their negativity.

2) Dominating the conversation

We all know someone who loves to hear themselves talk. I have a friend who, although well-meaning, tends to dominate our conversations. It’s like being in a monologue rather than a dialogue.

Every time we’re together, I find myself nodding and smiling as he goes on and on about his latest adventures, barely pausing for breath. He rarely asks about my life or opinions, and if I do manage to share something, he quickly shifts the focus back to himself.

He’s not doing this maliciously. In fact, he’s probably not even aware he’s doing it at all. But it’s exhausting. By the end of our catch-ups, I usually feel drained and unheard.

This behavior can leave people feeling unvalued and unimportant. It’s crucial to remember that conversation should be a two-way street – a give and take that leaves both parties feeling heard and understood.

3) Being overly critical

It’s natural for humans to judge and evaluate others. However, some people take it to an extreme, constantly critiquing everyone and everything around them. This behavior can be particularly draining to be around.

Criticism, when constructive, can help us grow and improve. But constant, harsh criticism can be damaging and demoralizing. It’s even been found that chronic exposure to criticism can lead to increased levels of stress and depression.

People who are overly critical often don’t realize the impact their words can have on others. They may believe they’re simply being honest or helpful. But if their comments are more often hurtful than beneficial, it can make interactions with them exhausting.

4) Lack of empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s a vital aspect of successful interpersonal relationships. However, some people struggle with this.

Interacting with someone who lacks empathy can be incredibly draining. It feels like you’re talking to a brick wall, especially when discussing personal issues or feelings. They might respond with indifference, dismissal, or even ridicule, which can leave you feeling unheard and invalidated.

One thing to remember is that some people are not naturally empathic, but this doesn’t mean they’re bad people. It could be due to various factors, including their upbringing or personal experiences.

However, if you frequently find yourself emotionally exhausted after interactions with such individuals, it might be worth addressing the issue or limiting your exposure to them.

5) Inability to listen

In our fast-paced world, truly listening to someone can feel like a rare gift. The ability to put aside our own thoughts and truly focus on another person is a precious skill that not everyone possesses.

We’ve all been in conversations where it’s clear the other person isn’t really listening. They might be distracted, impatiently waiting for their turn to speak, or simply disconnected. It can be disheartening and draining to pour your heart out to someone, only for them to respond with a cursory nod or change the subject entirely.

This lack of active listening can make you feel unimportant and unheard. It’s a clear sign of disinterest or a lack of respect for you and your feelings.

6) Constantly seeking validation

We all have a need for validation to some extent. It’s human nature to want to feel valued and appreciated. But there are those who take this to an extreme, constantly seeking approval or praise from others.

I remember a time in my life where I struggled with self-esteem. I often found myself fishing for compliments or affirmation, trying to fill that void of self-doubt. Looking back, I realize how draining it must’ve been for those around me.

People who constantly seek validation are often battling their own insecurities. While it’s natural to want to support and uplift them, it can become emotionally exhausting when their need for validation begins to overshadow your own needs and feelings.

7) Always playing the victim

Life is full of ups and downs, and we all face challenges. However, some people have a tendency to always see themselves as the victim, regardless of the situation.

This doesn’t mean that their problems aren’t real or valid. However, constantly being around someone who refuses to take responsibility for their actions or who always blames others can be exhausting.

This victim mentality can create a negative cycle of helplessness and resentment. It’s difficult to have a healthy, balanced relationship with someone who is perpetually stuck in this mindset.

8) Lack of respect for boundaries

Respect for personal boundaries is fundamental to any healthy relationship. However, some people seem to struggle with this concept.

Whether it’s constantly invading your personal space, disregarding your feelings, or insisting on their way regardless of your comfort level, these individuals can leave you feeling drained and disrespected.

It’s important to remember that everyone has the right to establish and maintain their personal boundaries. If someone repeatedly crosses these lines, it’s a clear sign of disrespect and a red flag that the relationship may be unhealthy.

Recognizing this behavior can empower you to stand up for yourself and demand the respect you deserve.

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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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