People who are deeply self-absorbed usually display these 11 behaviors (without realizing it)

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Ever feel like some people just talk about themselves non-stop? Or that your buddy doesn’t really care about your feelings?

You might be dealing with someone who’s self-absorbed. They might not even know they’re like this, but it sure does affect the people around them.

Believe it or not, there are clear signs that someone is more interested in their own world than in anyone else’s. And they might not even realize it!

So, let’s get into it. Here are 11 behaviors that self-absorbed people often show without even knowing it.

1) They dominate conversations

Ever tried to share something about your day, only to be interrupted by a story about theirs? This is a classic sign of a self-absorbed person.

They’re more interested in sharing their own experiences and opinions than in listening to what others have to say.

If you find yourself nodding along as they recount their latest exploits, but never get a chance to share your own, you might be dealing with someone who’s more self-centered than they realize.

2) They lack empathy

Does your friend seem unfazed by your problems? Do they brush off your feelings as if they’re not important? This could be another sign of self-absorption.

Self-absorbed individuals often struggle to put themselves in other people’s shoes. They’re so focused on their own feelings and experiences that they can’t – or don’t want to – understand what others are going through.

So if you’re sharing a tough time and they quickly steer the convo back to themselves, it’s another hint they might be more self-absorbed than they think.

3) They constantly seek validation

Have you ever noticed someone in your circle who’s always fishing for compliments?

I once had a friend who would constantly show off their new purchases or achievements, hungry for praise and approval. It seemed like they were always trying to prove their worth, and they would feel upset or even angry if they didn’t receive the validation they were seeking.

This kind of behavior is another common trait of self-absorbed individuals. They crave validation from others because they’re so focused on their own self-image, often without realizing how their constant need for approval affects those around them.

4) They think they’re always right

Ever tried to argue with someone who just won’t admit they’re wrong?

It’s like banging your head against a brick wall. This is another typical behavior of self-absorbed individuals. They often believe their opinions are the only correct ones and have a hard time accepting other perspectives.

Here’s an interesting fact: according to psychologists, this behavior is linked to a cognitive bias called the “bias blind spot“. This means that they can easily recognize biases in others but struggle to see them in themselves. 

5) They’re rarely happy for others

Have you ever shared some great news, only to receive a lukewarm, half-hearted response? It’s a bit of a downer, isn’t it?

People who are self-absorbed often struggle to genuinely celebrate others’ successes and happiness. Instead, they might feel envious or even threatened. It’s because they’re so focused on their own lives and achievements that they find it hard to spare genuine joy for someone else.

This can be hurtful, especially when you’re excited about something and want to share your happiness with them. 

6) They’re always the victim

Do you know someone who always seems to be the victim in every situation? I once had a co-worker who was like this.

No matter what happened, they were always the one who had been wronged, never the one at fault. They could twist any situation to make it seem like they were the innocent party. This is a common trait of self-absorbed individuals.

They are so wrapped up in their own perspective that they fail to see how their actions might have contributed to a problem. If you know someone like this, it’s another sign that they might be more self-absorbed than they realize.

7) They’re major attention-seekers

Let’s be real. We all enjoy a little attention now and then.

But for self-absorbed folks, it’s a whole different ball game. They crave the spotlight like a moth to a flame. They want everyone to notice them, listen to them, admire them. It’s exhausting.

They’ll do whatever it takes to be the center of attention, even if it means overshadowing others or being overly dramatic. It’s like they’re on a constant quest for validation and admiration, often without realizing how draining and frustrating it can be for those around them. 

8) They’re often ungrateful

Ever met someone who just can’t seem to appreciate what they have? In the world of self-absorbed people, gratitude often takes a backseat.

They’re so focused on what they want, what they don’t have, or what others have that they forget to appreciate the good things in their own lives.

Here’s an interesting fact: according to research, gratitude is linked to increased happiness and reduced depression. But for self-absorbed individuals, being grateful can be a challenge. 

9) They struggle to maintain long-term relationships

I once dated someone who was incredibly self-absorbed.

At first, I was drawn to their confidence and charm, but as time went on, I realized that our relationship was largely one-sided. They rarely asked about my day or showed interest in my feelings.

Their needs and wants always seemed to take precedence over mine. It was draining and ultimately led to the end of our relationship.

Guess what? This is a common pattern with self-absorbed people. They often struggle to maintain long-term relationships because they fail to give the same level of care and attention that they demand from others. 

10) They’re control freaks

Let’s cut to the chase. Self-absorbed people love to be in control.

Whether it’s a group project, a road trip, or even a casual dinner, they’ve got to call the shots. It’s as if their way is the only way and everyone else’s ideas or preferences are irrelevant. It’s frustrating, to say the least.

Their need for control often stems from their inability to consider others’ feelings or viewpoints. If you’ve got someone in your life who can’t let go of the reins, they might be more self-absorbed than they realize.

11) They rarely apologize

Here’s the brutal truth: self-absorbed folks have a hard time saying “I’m sorry.”

Why? Because apologizing means admitting they were wrong, and that doesn’t sit well with their self-image. They’d rather justify their actions or blame others than own up to their mistakes.

This lack of accountability can be hurtful and damaging, especially in close relationships. If you’re dealing with someone who can never admit they’re wrong or say sorry, chances are they’re more self-absorbed than they think.

Ego check: Dialing down the me, amplifying the we! 

In recognizing these subtle behaviors, we gain insight into the intricate dynamics of self-absorption. 

Whether it’s monopolizing conversations or seeking constant validation, these tendencies often go unnoticed by those who exhibit them. 

However, by fostering self-awareness and practicing empathy, individuals can navigate away from the pitfalls of self-absorption towards more fulfilling relationships and personal growth. 

Let us remember that self-awareness is the antidote to self-absorption, guiding us towards a path of genuine connection and understanding.

Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair is a former competitive athlete who transitioned into the world of wellness and mindfulness. Her journey through the highs and lows of competitive sports has given her a unique perspective on resilience and mental toughness. Ava’s writing reflects her belief in the power of small, daily habits to create lasting change.

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