If you’ve ever conversed with someone who always needs to have the last word, you know it can be a tad frustrating and perplexing.
This type of conversation often includes a series of annoying phrases that can leave you feeling unheard or dismissed.
These people don’t necessarily do this out of malice – it’s just their way of communicating.
But it’s hard to deny that it can be challenging to engage in a productive conversation with someone who always wants the final say.
Understanding the common phrases they use, though, might just help you navigate these tricky exchanges with more ease.
The following article will delve into the 8 phrases often used by those who always need to have the last word.
1) “But what I’m saying is…”
This phrase is a classic tool for those who always need to have the last word. It’s a way of dismissing what you’ve just said, and steering the conversation back to their point of view.
For instance, you might be discussing a movie you both watched, and you express your opinion. They respond with, “But what I’m saying is…” followed by their own thoughts.
It subtly implies that their perspective is more valid or important than yours.
What’s annoying about this phrase is how it undermines your input and makes it seem as if your opinion doesn’t hold as much weight.
It’s a sneaky tactic that’s designed to keep them in control of the conversation.
In these situations, it can feel like you’re being unheard or even disrespected.
But understanding this tactic can help you handle these exchanges more effectively.
You can assert your viewpoint and remind them that conversations are about mutual exchange, not one-upmanship.
2) “I just thought you should know…”
At first glance, this phrase might seem considerate. It can appear as though the person is sharing information for your benefit.
But for those who always need to have the last word, it’s often another tool in their conversational arsenal.
As Mark Twain once said, “A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.” In this case, the “lie” is the pretense of helpfulness.
When used in this way, “I just thought you should know…” can be a way to sneak in the last word under the guise of being helpful or informative.
It’s a tactic that allows them to add their final thoughts or opinions after you’ve finished speaking.
What makes this phrase particularly frustrating is how it’s presented as a favor to you. It’s as if they’re doing you a service by sharing their opinion, even when it might be entirely unsolicited.
3) “To be honest…”
“To be honest…” is a phrase that often prefaces a person’s real opinion about something.
Those who need to have the last word frequently use this phrase to assert their viewpoint as the most truthful or accurate one.
This phrase can be frustrating because it subtly suggests that everything said before was not entirely truthful or that their honesty holds a higher value.
The implication is that what they’re about to say is the ‘real’ truth, thereby dismissing your perspective.
The interesting part is that when people feel compelled to preface their statements with “to be honest,” it’s often a sign that they’re feeling defensive or insecure about their position.
It’s an unconscious attempt to bolster the perceived validity of their argument.
4) “Don’t take this the wrong way…”
This phrase is a classic example of trying to cushion a potentially hurtful or critical statement. Those who always need to have the last word might use it to share their thoughts without seeming too harsh.
However, it has the unfortunate effect of making the listener brace for impact. You’re left wondering what they’re about to say that might be taken ‘the wrong way.’
It’s important to remember that people often use this phrase when they’re unsure of how their words will be received.
They’re aware that their views might be contentious or unwelcome, but they still feel the need to express them.
In these situations, it can be helpful to respond with understanding and patience.
Everyone has moments where they struggle to express themselves appropriately, and showing empathy can often diffuse the tension in these conversations.
5) “If you really think about it…”
We’ve all been in a conversation where this phrase pops up.
Those who need to have the last word often use “If you really think about it…” as a way to subtly imply that their perspective is the more thoughtful or considered one.
It can be a bit bothersome because it suggests that if you had thought more deeply or carefully, you would naturally arrive at their viewpoint.
It’s as if your opinion is somehow less considered or insightful.
Yet, we’ve all had moments where we’ve been passionate about our perspective and wanted others to see things from our angle. It’s a universal human experience.
Knowing this, it can be easier to navigate these moments in conversation.
We can remind ourselves that just as we have strong beliefs, so do others, and that’s OK. The key is to ensure that everyone feels heard and respected.
6) “I’m just saying…”
This phrase is a common one. It’s often used as a way to express a controversial or contradictory opinion without taking full responsibility for its potential impact.
For example, imagine a discussion about a popular TV show.
You might share that you really enjoyed the latest episode, only for them to respond with, “I’m just saying, I think the writing has gotten worse.”
It’s as if by prefacing their opinion with “I’m just saying,” they’re trying to soften the blow and avoid potential backlash.
But in reality, it can feel dismissive of your own viewpoint and make the conversation feel one-sided.
7) “No offense, but…”
This phrase is often a red flag that an offensive statement is coming. People may use it as a way to express a controversial opinion or critique without bearing the brunt of its impact.
Hearing “No offense, but…” can be a bit like bracing for a punch. You’re left waiting for the potentially hurtful statement that’s about to come your way.
The reality is, if someone feels the need to preface their statement with “No offense,” they’re likely aware that what they’re about to say might be offensive or hurtful.
It’s not an excuse to say something unkind or dismissive.
So, when you hear this phrase, it’s okay to speak up and set boundaries.
You have every right to request respect and kindness in your conversations.
Don’t let anyone use ‘having the last word’ as an excuse for disrespect.
8) “At the end of the day…”
This phrase is often used by those who want to have the last word as a way to wrap up a conversation on their terms. It’s a way of saying, “No matter what has been discussed, here’s the final, most important takeaway.”
While it can be irritating to feel like someone else is determining the conclusion of a conversation, there’s something essential we should remember here.
“At the end of the day,” everyone wants to feel heard and valued in a conversation.
Whether it’s an intense debate or a casual chat, we all crave understanding and respect for our perspectives.
Wrapping it up
Being in a conversation should be about mutual sharing and understanding, not about who gets the last word or whose opinion reigns supreme.
During discussions, the ultimate goal isn’t to win debates or come out on top—it’s to foster healthier, more respectful conversations.
Time spent understanding and empathizing with each other is never time wasted.
And being truly wise means knowing when to speak, when to listen, and when to let others have the last word.
It means not letting anyone’s need for conversational dominance disrupt your peace or self-worth.