Ethan Sterling
When you’re a young and idealistic man, the future is bright; every day can feel exciting.
You wake up in the mornings with vigor and enthusiasm.
Then real life sets in, and you realize things aren’t so rosy.
Maybe you work a mindless, unsatisfying job with long hours.
Maybe you’re in an unsatisfying, tedious relationship.
Maybe your days just feel a bit too predictable and monotonous.
And then you unconsciously act out, perhaps later wondering why you did what you did.
In this article, I’ll take you through the behaviors of men who constantly feel unfulfilled in life.
So if these items sound familiar, realize that making a few adjustments is probably a good idea.
Let’s get to it!
1) They complain non-stop
A man who is unfulfilled in life can be a chore to be around.
They’re not exactly a ray of sunshine.
Much of the time, they’ll actively seek out things to complain and moan about.
And nobody is safe, from the drivers he deems inadequate to store clerks to friends and family.
His presence can feel draining.
Rather than be uplifting, his energy, resentment, and bitterness for the world will inevitably bring you down.
And the worst part: he’s just complaining for the sake of it.
He’ll rarely look for solutions, he’ll just dwell on his negativity and pessimism, which only reinforces and enhances his deep feeling of unfulfillment in life.
2) They procrastinate
When feeling unfulfilled becomes your status quo, this can be a tough cycle to break… and a lot of the time, you’ll end up feeling deeply unmotivated.
This can manifest as chronic procrastination.
When you procrastinate, you only use a fraction of your potential in life.
You can be the most talented, most intelligent person in town; you can have countless lofty goals and ambitions in life… but ultimately actions speak louder than words.
For many, taking action is the hard part, because it requires effort.
Unfulfilled men will often procrastinate.
They’ll delay important tasks and decisions, sometimes due to fear of failure or lack of motivation.
This becomes a self-perpetuating cycle of unproductiveness and frustration–which leads to a general lack of purpose and direction.
Trust me, I’ve been there many times… when you get into the habit of procrastination, correcting it is almost always an uphill battle.
3) They engage in negative self-talk
Unfulfilled men tend to get incredibly down on themselves.
You see, a confident, happy person will take the occasional blunder in stride, as a life lesson, rather than a permanent reflection of their worth.
Negative self-talk is another toxic cycle that unfulfilled men can get deep into.
Rather than come back stronger, they’ll stay down indefinitely, thinking they are incapable of doing better.
They’re far too self-critical… which ultimately makes them doubt their abilities and damage their self-esteem.
In turn, they unconsciously steer clear of fresh experiences or tasks.
Their fear of failure overcomes them.
They’ll refuse to take any chances, staying in their comfort zone for lengthy periods.
Any reasonable person knows that to achieve something of value in life, risk will always be involved.
So when you refuse to take the plunge and take any risks, you’re actively limiting your personal growth.
A shame indeed.
4) They compare themselves to others
In case you haven’t noticed, unfulfilled men have their fair share of bad habits… one of which is frequently comparing themselves to others.
For instance, maybe they’ll scroll through social media and feel like they’re lagging far behind everyone else.
Remember, things like growth and success are linear.
Rather than be satisfied with your actual progress and journey, when you compare yourself to everyone, it will never be enough… there will always be someone doing better, leaving you perpetually discontent and disgruntled.
Your worth as a person should come from within, not relative to how everyone else is doing.
Comparing yourself is a dangerous game; when you get too caught up in it, feelings of inadequacy and dissatisfaction can become the norm.
5) They isolate themselves
Prolonged feelings of unfulfillment can make you miserable.
Sometimes, a man, knowing his external environment will not bring him joy, will instead retreat and become isolated at home.
Maybe he was once sociable and friendly but abruptly begins withdrawing himself from interactions and relationships… going awol for weeks at a time.
His loneliness overwhelms him and he becomes indifferent to relationships and being a part of society.
And while he’s isolated, he will often neglect self-care.
He might engage in unhealthy habits, like binge eating (more on this later) or sleeping all day,
He might neglect his fundamental physical and mental needs, which profoundly affects his overall well-being.
Not good.
6) They overindulge in escapism
A few years ago, I was unfulfilled and frustrated with life.
I was working a crappy job; at home, my girlfriend at the time would regularly disrespect me; my life felt like a miserable, repetitive loop.
To remedy my situation, I’d often engage in escapist, sometimes self-destructive behaviors.
Some nights, I’d get blackout drunk and stay out till the wee hours of the evening (sometimes morning.)
On most days, I’d binge-eat fast food and junk while watching Netflix and playing video games for hours and hours at a time.
I wasn’t happy, but instead of addressing it head-on, I’d put things off and distract myself with hedonism.
The bottom line?
When a man feels chronically unfulfilled, excess escapism becomes the easy way out… and a trap many, many of us are liable to fall into.
Final words
As men, we can all end up in funks from time to time.
So if you’re feeling down, rest assured, you’re from alone.
And that’s okay. It’s how you respond that counts.
I know, it’s easier said than done. But you have it in you to change.
Reach out to friends or family; seek professional help, if necessary.
Things will improve if you have the right approach.
One day, this too shall pass, and you’ll be far stronger because of it.
