8 subtle phrases that reveal someone lacks the discipline and resilience required to get ahead in today’s world

Discipline and resilience are two of the biggest factors in whether someone thrives or stays stuck.

They shape how we handle setbacks, push through challenges, and keep moving forward when things get tough.

But here’s the thing—people who lack these qualities often reveal it in subtle ways, especially through the words they use.

Certain phrases might seem harmless on the surface, but they can actually signal a mindset that avoids responsibility, gives up too easily, or makes excuses instead of finding solutions.

If you want to spot these patterns—whether in yourself or others—pay attention to the language being used.

Here are eight subtle phrases that show someone may not have the discipline and resilience needed to truly get ahead in today’s world.

1) “I’ll do it when I feel ready”

Discipline and resilience aren’t about waiting for the perfect moment—they’re about taking action even when things aren’t ideal.

People who lack these traits often hesitate, telling themselves they’ll start when they feel ready.

But the truth is, no one ever truly feels ready. Growth happens by stepping outside your comfort zone, not by waiting for the stars to align.

This phrase is a subtle excuse disguised as patience. It keeps people stuck, avoiding challenges instead of facing them head-on.

Those who succeed understand that progress comes through action, not perfect conditions.

Instead of waiting to feel ready, the real question should be: What small step can I take today?

2) “I just don’t have the time”

I used to say this all the time—especially when it came to things that would actually improve my life.

A few years ago, I kept telling myself I didn’t have time to exercise, read more, or work on personal projects.

My schedule was too packed, and there were always a million other things demanding my attention. But deep down, I knew the truth: It wasn’t about time. It was about priorities.

The reality is, we all have the same 24 hours in a day. The difference is how we choose to use them.

People who lack discipline and resilience often convince themselves they’re too busy, when in reality, they’re just not making the effort to prioritize what truly matters.

Once I stopped using this excuse and started being honest with myself, everything changed.

Instead of saying, “I don’t have time,” I started asking, “How can I make time?” And that simple shift made all the difference.

3) “I can’t help it, that’s just the way I am”

This phrase might sound harmless, but it’s actually one of the biggest barriers to growth. It’s a way of avoiding responsibility, convincing yourself that change isn’t possible.

What many people don’t realize is that the brain is constantly rewiring itself based on experiences, habits, and mindset.

This process, known as neuroplasticity, means that no one is truly stuck the way they are.

People who succeed understand this—they know they can build discipline, resilience, and new skills over time.

On the other hand, those who say “that’s just the way I am” are giving themselves permission to stay the same.

Instead of pushing through challenges or learning new ways to improve, they settle for limitations that don’t actually have to exist.

4) “It’s not fair”

Life isn’t fair—everyone learns this at some point. But people who lack discipline and resilience tend to dwell on it, using unfairness as a reason to give up or stop trying.

The truth is, setbacks, obstacles, and disadvantages are part of life. The most successful people don’t waste energy complaining about what’s unfair; they focus on what they can control.

They adapt, find solutions, and keep moving forward even when the odds aren’t in their favor.

Constantly saying “It’s not fair” shifts the focus to external factors instead of personal effort. And while unfair situations exist, dwelling on them won’t change anything—only action will.

5) “I’m just not lucky”

It’s easy to look at successful people and assume they got there because of luck. But behind every achievement, there are years of effort, failures, and persistence that most people never see.

Believing that success is purely a matter of luck takes away personal responsibility. It suggests that no matter how hard you try, things won’t change unless fate decides otherwise.

But the truth is, resilience comes from showing up even when things aren’t going your way. Discipline comes from doing the work even when no immediate reward is in sight.

The people who truly get ahead in life aren’t just lucky. They create their own opportunities by refusing to give up, by learning from failure, and by pushing forward when others would quit.

Luck might play a role, but mindset and effort will always matter more.

6) “I’m too tired”

Some days, exhaustion feels overwhelming.

The weight of responsibilities, setbacks, and constant demands can make even the smallest tasks seem impossible. It’s tempting to say, “I’m too tired,” and put things off for another day.

But discipline isn’t built on motivation—it’s built on showing up even when you don’t feel like it.

Resilience comes from pushing through those moments when everything in you wants to stop. Rest is important, but so is recognizing when exhaustion is a real need versus an easy escape.

The truth is, some of the most meaningful progress happens in the moments when quitting feels like the easiest option.

Getting ahead in life isn’t about never feeling tired—it’s about deciding to move forward anyway.

7) “I’ll get to it someday”

Someday is a dangerous word. It feels harmless—like there’s plenty of time, like the right moment will eventually come. But more often than not, someday turns into never.

People who lack discipline and resilience use this phrase to delay action, convincing themselves they’ll chase their goals when they have more time, more energy, or more confidence.

But waiting for the right time is just another way of avoiding discomfort. The truth is, there will never be a perfect moment to start—there will only ever be now.

Those who get ahead in life understand this. They take action even when things aren’t ideal.

They know that progress isn’t about waiting—it’s about starting, adjusting, and pushing forward despite the uncertainty.

8) “That’s impossible”

The moment you decide something is impossible, you stop looking for solutions. You stop trying. You accept limitations that may not even be real.

History is full of people who achieved things that once seemed impossible—because they refused to believe it was.

Resilient people don’t see obstacles as dead ends; they see them as challenges to overcome.

Disciplined people don’t wait for proof that something can be done—they create the proof themselves.

The truth is, most limits exist only in the mind. And the people who get ahead in life are the ones who refuse to let those limits define them.

Bottom line: Words shape reality

The way we speak reflects the way we think—and over time, the words we repeat shape our reality.

Psychologists have found that self-talk plays a crucial role in shaping resilience and mental toughness.

When someone constantly tells themselves that they can’t, that it’s too hard, or that they have no control, their brain starts to believe it. These phrases don’t just describe a mindset; they reinforce it.

But the reverse is also true. Shifting language—choosing words that emphasize action, responsibility, and possibility—can rewire the brain toward growth.

The difference between those who stay stuck and those who push forward often comes down to this: Are they speaking limitations into existence, or are they using their words to create momentum?

Pay attention to the phrases you use. They might be shaping your future more than you realize.

Did you like my article? Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed.

Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

People who exaggerate illness or pain for sympathy usually display these 8 psychological traits (without realizing it)

9 lessons from Buddhism that will help anyone feeling lost in life