If your goal is to find happiness in a ‘normal life’, say goodbye to these 5 daily habits

With so many influences telling us how to be happier—social media feeds, well-meaning friends, that self-help guru you stumbled upon on YouTube—sometimes it’s tough to figure out what actually works.

But in my experience, if your goal is to find happiness in a so-called “normal life,” it’s not always about adding fancy new habits. Often, it’s about dropping the ones that make daily contentment harder than it needs to be.

Here are five daily habits that can keep you feeling stuck, stressed, or unsatisfied—and how letting go of them can open up more space for genuine happiness.

1. Comparing yourself to others

Have you ever found yourself scrolling through social media and thinking, “Wow, they’re doing so much better than I am”? 

Trust me, we’ve all been there. It’s so easy to fall into the comparison trap these days. We see our friends, colleagues, or even strangers posting pictures of their “perfect” lives online and subconsciously measure ourselves against them.

But there’s a big problem with this game: it’s rigged. 

Social media is a highlight reel, not real life. We’re stacking our behind-the-scenes against someone else’s polished performance. The solution?

As psychologist Jordan Peterson advised, “Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.”

That quote hits home for me. I used to get bogged down in how far ahead everyone else seemed, especially when I was just starting this site. Over time, however, I realized that this constant measuring didn’t help me grow—it just made me feel inadequate. 

It’s far more productive (and healthier for your self-esteem) to compare your present self with who you were yesterday. Are you making progress in areas that matter to you? Great. That’s what counts. 

2. Overlooking the good in your life 

In the hustle of daily life, it’s super easy to forget about the things that are actually going well, right? We tend to focus on our failures, complaints, and what’s missing from our lives instead of noticing the good stuff that’s right in front of us. 

I’ve definitely been guilty of this—it’s something I’ve talked about before, but it’s worth revisiting here because it’s a habit that can quietly drain your happiness.

Let me share a personal example: a couple of years back, I was so wrapped up in chasing the next big goal for this site that I overlooked how fortunate I was to have supportive friends, decent health, and creative freedom in my career. Basically, I was so laser-focused on “What’s next?” that I missed the joy and gratitude for what I already had.

Let’s just say it took a mini-burnout for me to realize that savoring my current blessings was just as important as striving for new ones. The folks at Harvard Health back this up, noting: 

“In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.”

Nowadays, one way I keep myself on track is by taking a moment every morning to list a few things I’m grateful for. It could be something as small as a warm cup of coffee or as big as being able to create a career I love. By focusing on the good in my life, I shift my perspective—and suddenly, “normal” starts to look a lot more meaningful.

As Lao Tzu once said, “When you realize nothing is lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” While I’m far from attaining that level of zen every day, simply pausing to acknowledge that I do have enough (and in many ways, more than enough) transforms the way I see my life.

It might just do the same for you. 

3. Neglecting self-care

In our achievement-obsessed culture, self-care sometimes feels like a luxury—or even self-indulgence. 

I used to think that way, at least. Skipping meals or pulling all-nighters was practically a badge of honor when I first got into writing. Sleep? That was for the weak. Taking breaks? That was time wasted.

You can probably guess where that got me—burned out and mentally fried. It’s no surprise either. As noted by the folks at Psych Central, a lack of self-care is associated with feeling hopeless, a lack of patience, and worsening symptoms of anxiety and depression. Not exactly the recipe for a happy, balanced life.

But self-care isn’t just about bubble baths or spa days (though, hey, I’m not against those either). It’s about establishing daily habits that nurture your mind, body, and spirit. For me, self-care includes things like mindfulness meditation, journaling, and—when my schedule allows—a quick nature walk to clear my head.

4. Relying on digital communication only 

Have you ever found yourself texting a friend who’s just a few feet away, or realized you can’t recall the last time you heard someone’s voice without a smartphone in the middle? 

I’m all for technology—it’s helped me grow my website, connect with people all over the world, and learn faster than any generation before me. But there’s a difference between using tech as a tool and letting it replace real human connection.

When the majority of your interactions start happening through screens, you lose those subtleties—facial expressions, body language, that comfortable silence when two friends just “get” each other. 

The point? While typing out a message or sending an emoji can be handy, it’s not a replacement for sitting across from someone and having a genuine chat.

If you find yourself relying on digital-only interactions, try scheduling small in-person meetups with friends or family. 

Grab coffee with an old classmate, take a stroll around the neighborhood with a coworker after hours, or give someone a call instead of sending a text. Breaking free from the screen isn’t always easy, especially if you’ve built your routine around online interactions, but the payoff is worth it—genuine human connection.

5. Skipping exercise

For a long time, I saw exercise purely as a way to look better. Sure, I knew it was “good for me,” but I was more motivated by the results in the mirror. 

Then I started running—and it transformed not just my body, but my mind. I was doing 5K a day and experiencing massive improvements in my mood, energy levels, and stress management. (I’ve been sidelined by an injury lately, and I can definitely feel the difference in my daily happiness.)

There’s actual science to back up these benefits, too. As noted by the team at Healthline, the benefits of exercise go far beyond what we see in the mirror. For instance, studies have shown that just 10-30 minutes of exercise is enough to improve your mood. It can also improve your sleep quality.

I can attest to these benefits firsthand—even a short jog helps clear my mind, calm my nerves, and reset my perspective on problems that once felt overwhelming.

It doesn’t have to be jogging, though. The key is finding something you genuinely enjoy—because let’s face it, dragging yourself to do a workout you hate isn’t exactly sustainable. 

Whether it’s dancing, hiking, cycling, or a team sport, movement has a magical way of boosting well-being. And if you’re tight on time, even a brisk 10-minute walk can help you de-stress and break the monotony of sitting in front of a screen.

Final words

A lot of times, we get caught up thinking happiness is some grand achievement—a bigger house, a fancier vacation, the perfect relationship. But I’ve learned that lasting contentment often comes down to the simpler routines we follow each day. 

If you want a life that feels meaningful, balanced, and yes, “normal,” start by letting go of the habits that undermine your peace of mind.

Whether it’s resisting the urge to compare yourself to others, taking a moment to appreciate what you already have, carving out time for self-care, stepping away from the screen to connect with people face-to-face, or simply remembering to move your body, each step you take away from these energy-draining habits is a step toward more genuine fulfillment.