9 lazy relationship behaviors you should never put up with, according to psychology

As people, we all seek love, understanding, and effort in our relationships.

But when these are missing, we find ourselves in is called a “lazy relationship.”

In such relationships, one or both partners might be showing a lack of effort, commitment, or initiative. This can lead to feelings of being unappreciated, unimportant or taken for granted.

Lazy relationship behaviors can be subtle and may go unnoticed at first. Over time, though, they can seriously undermine your happiness and satisfaction in the relationship.

This article is here to help you identify some common lazy relationship behaviors that psychology says you should never tolerate.

Let’s delve into the signs and learn more about maintaining healthy, fulfilling relationships.

1) They make minimal effort

In a lazy relationship, minimal effort is one of the most prominent signs. This behavior can manifest in many ways and can be quite subtle at first.

You might notice that your partner often leaves all the planning to you, be it about your dates, trips or even daily life.

They may seem uninterested in making decisions or contributing ideas. You might find yourself always initiating communication, while they seem perfectly okay with long periods of silence.

Maybe they rarely take the initiative to show affection or appreciation, leaving you feeling unloved and undervalued. Perhaps they always let you do the heavy lifting in difficult situations, offering little to no support.

This consistent lack of effort over time can leave you feeling exhausted and neglected. It’s a lazy relationship behavior that shouldn’t be overlooked.

It’s crucial for both partners to actively contribute to the relationship’s growth and happiness.

2) They avoid conflict

Avoiding conflict might sound like a good thing at first glance. Who wants to argue, right?

But in truth, conflict avoidance can be a lazy relationship behavior that’s detrimental in the long run.

In every relationship, disagreements are bound to happen. It’s how couples navigate these disagreements that matters most.

Avoiding conflicts might seem like an easy way out but it can lead to unresolved issues piling up over time.

When your partner always seems to brush off serious discussions or changes the topic when you bring up something that’s bothering you, they’re avoiding conflict.

This behavior not only stops the relationship from growing but it also prevents you from expressing your feelings and being heard.

Remember, open communication is key in a relationship. It’s necessary for both partners to face and resolve conflicts together.

This isn’t about winning or losing an argument, but about understanding each other better and finding a middle ground.

3) They’re always agreeable

It’s nice to be with someone who always agrees with you, isn’t it?

They never argue with your choices, they go along with your plans without a fuss, and they seem to like everything you like. Sounds perfect, right?

Well, not exactly.

If your partner is always agreeable and never has an opinion of their own, it might not be as ideal as it seems.

This might be lazy relationship behavior, where your partner is simply going along with everything to avoid making an effort to express their own views or preferences.

A healthy relationship is built on mutual respect, and that includes respecting each other’s individuality.

It’s important for both partners to have their own opinions and to feel comfortable expressing them.

Remember, a relationship is about two unique individuals coming together, not one person losing themselves in the other.

4) They’re indifferent to your needs

Nothing stings more than indifference from someone you care about.

In a lazy relationship, your partner might neglect your needs, both emotional and physical.

Maybe they’re not there for you when you’re going through a tough time, or they seem unbothered when something clearly upsets you. Perhaps they ignore your need for intimacy or are dismissive of the effort you put into the relationship.

This isn’t about expecting them to fulfill every single need you have; that’s unrealistic.

But in a healthy relationship, your partner should care about your wellbeing, respect your feelings, and be willing to meet you halfway.

If you constantly find yourself feeling neglected or ignored, it’s time to reevaluate.

This level of indifference is a clear sign of lazy relationship behavior and something that you should never put up with.

5) They neglect self-growth

We all have our flaws and areas we need to improve in. That’s the essence of being human.

However, if you notice your partner seems uninterested in personal growth or self-improvement, this could be a sign of lazy relationship behavior.

Maybe they refuse to work on their bad habits or they’re indifferent to your suggestions for growth. Perhaps they don’t take responsibility for their actions, or they’re stuck in a rut and show no signs of wanting to get out.

Remember, it’s not your responsibility to change anyone but it is important to be with someone who is willing to grow, not just for the relationship but for themselves too.

We all deserve a partner who strives to be the best version of themselves—someone who is not perfect but is perfectly committed to growing with us.

6) They forget the little things

In life, it’s often the little things that mean the most.

This is why a forgotten birthday or anniversary can be a clear sign of lazy relationship behavior.

But it’s not just about forgetting dates.

Perhaps your partner consistently forgets to do small things they promised, like taking out the trash or picking up groceries. Maybe they don’t remember personal details you shared, like your favorite food or movie. Or they might not notice or appreciate the small gestures you do for them.

While these might seem like minor things, over time, they can add up and make you feel unappreciated and neglected.

In a healthy relationship, both partners pay attention to and cherish these small details because they understand that love is shown in the everyday little acts of care and thoughtfulness.

7) They’re always on the couch

We all love a good Netflix binge or a lazy Sunday on the couch, but if your partner seems to have made the couch their permanent residence, it might be a sign of lazy relationship behavior.

They’re always too tired to go out, or they’re constantly glued to their phone or the TV. They never seem to have the energy for shared activities or hobbies that you used to enjoy together.

While it’s important to respect each other’s downtime, a relationship also needs shared experiences and adventures to keep it thriving.

It’s all about finding that balance between cozy nights in and exciting days out.

8) They avoid responsibility

If your partner seems to have an allergic reaction every time the word “responsibility” is mentioned, it’s a telltale sign of lazy relationship behavior.

They never remember to pay the bills on time, or they always leave the dishes for you to clean up. They’re always late, or they keep breaking promises, leaving you to carry the burden.

A relationship is a partnership, and that means sharing responsibilities equally. It’s not up to you to pick up their slack or fix their mess.

If your partner consistently avoids responsibility, it’s time to put your foot down. You’re their partner, not their parent. It’s essential for them to step up and contribute equally to the relationship.

9) They take you for granted

In all these lazy relationship behaviors, there’s one underlying issue that can’t be ignored: taking your partner for granted.

If your partner doesn’t acknowledge the effort you put into the relationship or assumes you’ll always be there no matter how they behave, that’s a glaring red flag. It shows they don’t appreciate you and neglect to reciprocate your efforts.

Taking someone for granted is perhaps the laziest of all relationship behaviors. It diminishes the value of your efforts and can make you feel invisible and unappreciated.

Remember, you deserve to be with someone who values and cherishes you. Someone who sees and appreciates all the love and effort you bring into the relationship.

So, never – ever – settle for someone who takes you for granted.

This is perhaps the most important advice to remember when navigating through relationships.

Final thoughts

If you’ve recognized some of these lazy relationship behaviors in your partner, it’s important to remember that you’re not alone.

Relationships require effort from both partners, and when one person isn’t pulling their weight, it can feel exhausting and disappointing.

But remember that you can’t force someone to change if they’re unwilling to put in the effort. This is not a reflection on you or your worthiness of love and effort.

You cannot make someone value you by loving them harder. It’s their responsibility to recognize your worth.

Isabella Chase

Isabella Chase, a New York City native, writes about the complexities of modern life and relationships. Her articles draw from her experiences navigating the vibrant and diverse social landscape of the city. Isabella’s insights are about finding harmony in the chaos and building strong, authentic connections in a fast-paced world.

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