James Carter
We’ve all heard the old adage, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
This sentiment rings true especially for highly disciplined individuals.
Being disciplined isn’t just about personal habits and routines; it extends to the relationships we maintain.
Certain types of relationships can drain our energy, distract us from our goals, and even influence our behavior negatively.
So, what types of relationships do disciplined people tend to avoid?
Well, according to psychology, there are seven specific types that can hinder personal growth and productivity.
This isn’t about cutting ties with loved ones or being unsociable.
It’s about identifying which relationships serve you well and which ones could be holding you back.
So if you’re striving for discipline in your life or simply want to understand your relationships better, read on as we explore these seven types of relationships that highly disciplined people tend to avoid.
Let’s dive in.
1) Energy drainers
We all know someone who seems to suck the energy right out of a room, don’t we?
These are the individuals who always seem to be surrounded by drama or negativity.
They’re often pessimistic and can’t seem to find the silver lining in any situation.
For highly disciplined people, maintaining relationships with energy drainers can be incredibly challenging.
After all, it’s hard to stay focused and motivated when you’re constantly bogged down by someone else’s negativity.
Disciplined individuals understand the importance of a positive mindset.
They recognize that their time and energy are precious resources that should be invested wisely.
If a relationship is more draining than it is enriching, disciplined people are likely to distance themselves from it.
They understand that in order to maintain their own well-being and productivity, they need to surround themselves with positivity and optimism.
It’s not about being selfish; it’s about preserving your mental and emotional health.
2) One-sided relationships
Ever been in a relationship where it felt like you were doing all the giving and the other person was doing all the taking?
I have. And let me tell you, it’s exhausting.
A few years ago, I had a friend who would only reach out when they needed something. Whether it was a ride to the airport or help with a project, I was their go-to person.
But when I needed support or even just someone to talk to, they were nowhere to be found.
This kind of one-sided relationship is not sustainable, especially for highly disciplined individuals.
They understand that successful relationships require balance and reciprocity.
Disciplined people value their time and energy. They’re willing to invest in others, but not at the expense of their own wellbeing.
If a relationship is consistently one-sided, they’re likely to step back and reassess.
It’s essential to have relationships where both parties are equally invested, where there’s a healthy give-and-take.
That’s how we grow and learn from each other.
3) Relationships rooted in competition
Picture this: You’ve just landed a promotion at work or achieved a personal goal.
You’re on cloud nine, excitedly sharing the news with a friend.
Instead of celebrating with you, they immediately launch into their own achievements, as if it’s some sort of competition.
Sound familiar?
Competitive relationships – ones where you constantly feel the need to outdo each other – can be incredibly draining.
They turn what should be a source of support and encouragement into a battlefield.
Highly disciplined people don’t have time for such petty contests. They understand that life isn’t a competition to be won.
Each person is on their own unique journey, with different goals and timelines.
For disciplined individuals, relationships should be about mutual support and encouragement, not one-upmanship.
They avoid those who constantly compare themselves or turn every achievement into a contest.
Because at the end of the day, your relationships should lift you up, not drag you into an exhausting race.
4) Relationships with no boundaries
Let me paint a picture for you.
A friend calls you late at night when you’re about to sleep, knowing well that you have an early morning.
Or a colleague consistently dumps their workload on you, assuming you’ll take care of it.
These scenarios reflect relationships with no boundaries.
Highly disciplined people are usually clear about their personal space and time.
They know when to say ‘no’ and how to set boundaries that protect their peace and productivity.
Disciplined individuals avoid relationships where their boundaries are constantly being tested or disrespected.
They understand that it’s not about being rigid but about preserving their mental space and energy for things that truly matter.
After all, maintaining healthy boundaries is crucial for any relationship to thrive.
And knowing when to draw the line is a discipline in itself.
5) Relationships based on validation
People who look for constant validation or approval are more likely to feel anxious and insecure.
This type of relationship, where one party constantly seeks approval, can be mentally taxing.
Highly disciplined individuals tend to avoid these relationships.
They understand that self-worth should come from within and not depend on external validation.
Disciplined people know their value and don’t need constant affirmation from others to feel good about themselves.
Similarly, they prefer to surround themselves with people who have a healthy sense of self-esteem.
A good relationship is about mutual respect and understanding, not about feeding someone’s insecurities or need for constant approval.
6) Relationships with those who don’t respect differences
We’re all different, aren’t we? We have our own quirks, preferences, and ways of doing things. And that’s what makes us unique.
However, not everyone appreciates these differences.
Some people insist on their way being the “right” way and can be dismissive or even disrespectful when others don’t conform to their views.
Highly disciplined people understand the value of diversity.
They appreciate the beauty of different perspectives and ways of life.
Disciplined individuals tend to avoid relationships with those who cannot respect or appreciate these differences.
They believe in cultivating an environment of understanding and acceptance.
Because at the end of the day, it’s our differences that enrich our lives and widen our horizons. And wouldn’t it be a dull world if we were all the same?
7) Relationships that hinder personal growth
The most crucial relationships to avoid? Those that hinder your personal growth.
Highly disciplined individuals are committed to their personal development.
They understand that to grow, they need to surround themselves with people who challenge, inspire and support them.
If a relationship is stifling their growth, making them feel stuck or hindering their progress, disciplined people are likely to step back.
They appreciate relationships that offer room for growth and self-improvement.
After all, your personal journey should be about moving forward, not being held back.
Choose relationships that nourish your growth and make you a better person.
Final reflections
Navigating relationships can sometimes feel like walking a tightrope.
And when you’re a disciplined person, the challenge can seem even greater.
But remember, you have the power to choose who you let into your life.
Don’t be afraid to step back from relationships that drain you or hinder your growth.
It’s not about being unkind or selfish, it’s about self-preservation and maintaining your focus on personal goals.
As you go forward, take some time to reflect on your relationships.
What do they add to your life? Are they helping or hindering your journey towards discipline and growth?
Transforming relationships is not an overnight process, and that’s okay. It’s a journey of self-discovery and growth.
So, be patient with yourself. Seek support when you need it. Cherish the relationships that uplift you and gently let go of those that don’t.
After all, you deserve relationships that respect your discipline, appreciate your growth, and celebrate your journey.
