Lachlan Brown
Life isn’t easy. No matter who you are, challenges will come your way.
I used to think hardship was something to be avoided—a sign that life wasn’t going the way it should. But over the years, I’ve come to realize that struggle isn’t just inevitable; it’s necessary.
Some hardships hit unexpectedly, while others are just part of being human. But all of them have the potential to make us wiser, tougher, and more grounded—if we embrace them.
In this article, I’ll walk you through 7 unavoidable challenges in life that, according to psychology, actually help build resilience and inner strength.
Let’s dive in.
1) Facing failure and rejection
No one likes to fail. No one enjoys being rejected. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that these moments—no matter how painful—are some of the most valuable experiences life throws our way.
I used to take failure personally. Every time something didn’t work out, whether it was a job I didn’t get or a relationship that fell apart, I saw it as proof that I wasn’t good enough.
But psychology tells a different story. Research shows that failure and rejection, when handled the right way, actually build resilience. They teach us adaptability, push us to improve, and help us develop emotional strength.
Instead of seeing failure as a dead-end, I started viewing it as a lesson—a chance to grow instead of something to fear. And once I made that shift, setbacks lost their power over me.
If you’re facing failure right now, take a step back and ask yourself: What can I learn from this?
It might not feel like it in the moment, but every rejection and disappointment is shaping you into a stronger, wiser version of yourself.
2) Experiencing loss and grief
Loss is one of the hardest things we go through as humans. Whether it’s losing a loved one, a friendship, or even a version of ourselves we once identified with, grief has a way of shaking us to our core.
I remember when I lost my grandfather. He was one of the few people in my life who truly understood me, and when he passed away, I felt like a part of me went with him. For months, I struggled to make sense of it. I tried to push the pain down, to distract myself—but nothing worked.
Eventually, I realized something: grief isn’t something you can outrun. You have to sit with it, feel it, and let it change you. And as painful as it was, that experience taught me an incredible lesson about resilience.
Psychologist Carl Jung once said, “I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.”
That quote stuck with me because loss doesn’t just take things away—it also gives us a choice. We can let it break us, or we can allow it to shape us into stronger, more compassionate people.
3) Struggling with self-doubt
For years, self-doubt controlled my life.
I second-guessed everything—my decisions, my abilities, even my worth. I’d hesitate before speaking up in conversations, convinced that what I had to say wasn’t important. I’d avoid opportunities because I didn’t think I was good enough to take them.
One of the biggest moments of self-doubt in my life came when I first started writing online.
I wanted to share my thoughts on mindfulness and personal growth, but a voice in my head kept whispering: “Who are you to talk about this? No one’s going to care what you have to say.”
Psychologists call this the “impostor syndrome“—the feeling that we’re not as competent as others think we are. But the truth is, most people experience it at some point. The key is learning to push forward despite it.
If self-doubt is keeping you stuck, remember this: you don’t need to be 100% confident before taking action. Start before you feel ready. Confidence isn’t something you wait for—it’s something you build by proving to yourself that you’re capable.
4) Feeling lonely and disconnected
Loneliness is something we all experience at some point. But when you’re in it, it can feel like you’re the only one.
I remember a time in my mid-20s when I felt completely disconnected from others.
My friendships felt surface-level, I wasn’t in a relationship, and I spent a lot of time alone, wondering if something was wrong with me.
At first, I resisted the loneliness—I tried to distract myself with work and social media. But eventually, I had to face it. And surprisingly, that’s when everything started to shift.
Research shows that periods of loneliness can actually help us develop emotional resilience. A study published found that people who experience loneliness and use it as a time for self-reflection often develop greater emotional intelligence and stronger coping skills.
Looking back, that lonely period in my life forced me to get comfortable with myself. It pushed me to build a deeper relationship with who I was, rather than relying on others for validation.
5) Dealing with uncertainty
Uncertainty used to terrify me.
One of the most uncertain times in my life was when I quit my job to pursue writing full-time. I had no steady income, no safety net, and no guarantee that it would work out. Every day, I wrestled with doubt: “What if I fail? What if this is a huge mistake?”
But over time, I learned that uncertainty isn’t something to fear—it’s something to embrace.
Psychology backs this up: research from Dr. Nassim Taleb, author of Antifragile, suggests that exposing ourselves to uncertainty and unpredictability actually makes us more adaptable and resilient in the long run.
The more we step into the unknown, the better we become at handling life’s twists and turns.
Looking back, taking that leap into the unknown was one of the best decisions I ever made. It forced me to grow in ways I never would have if I had stayed where it was safe and predictable.
6) Struggling with criticism
For a long time, I took criticism personally.
Every negative comment, every piece of feedback that wasn’t glowing—it all felt like an attack. I’d dwell on it for days, replaying the words in my head and letting them chip away at my confidence.
I remember the first time I received harsh criticism on something I wrote. A reader left a comment saying my article was “shallow” and “lacked real insight.”
It stung. My first instinct was to stop writing altogether—I figured if I couldn’t get it right, what was the point?
But over time, I realized something: criticism isn’t always a bad thing. In fact, it can be one of the greatest tools for growth—if we learn to handle it correctly.
Psychologist Carol Dweck, known for her work on mindset, once said: “Becoming is better than being.”
This idea is at the core of what she calls the growth mindset—the belief that challenges and feedback help us improve rather than define us.
Now, when I receive feedback (even the tough kind), I ask myself: Is there something valuable here? Can this help me grow?
And more often than not, the answer is yes.
7) Feeling stuck in life
Feeling stuck seems like a bad thing. But what if it’s actually one of the most important experiences for growth?
I’ve been stuck more times than I can count. Stuck in a job I didn’t love, stuck in routines that drained me, stuck in a version of myself that no longer felt right.
And every time, I saw it as failure—like I was falling behind while everyone else was moving forward.
But here’s what I’ve learned: feeling stuck isn’t a sign that something is wrong. It’s a sign that something needs to change.
Psychology backs this up—research on motivation shows that discomfort and dissatisfaction are often the first steps toward transformation. When we feel stuck, our brains start looking for new solutions, new paths, and new ways to grow.
Instead of seeing stagnation as failure, I started using it as a signal—a wake-up call to reassess my direction. And every major turning point in my life? It started with feeling stuck.
If you’re in that place right now, try this: instead of fighting the feeling, lean into it. Ask yourself, “What is this discomfort trying to tell me?”
Journal about it, explore new interests, or make one small change—because even the tiniest shift can set big things in motion.
Conclusion: Turning hardships into strength
Hard times are inevitable—but they don’t have to break you. In fact, they can be the very thing that makes you stronger, wiser, and more resilient.
The key is in how you respond. Instead of resisting challenges, start asking: What can I learn from this? How can this help me grow?
And most importantly—keep going. No struggle lasts forever, and every difficulty you face is shaping you into the person you’re meant to become.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, start small. Focus on one challenge at a time. Take one step forward today, no matter how small it seems.
Over time, those steps add up—and before you know it, you’ll look back and realize just how strong you’ve become.
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