If you can’t remember the last time you felt good about yourself, say goodbye to these 8 habits

It’s a tough admission, but sometimes we are our own worst enemies.

We get stuck in old habits that no longer serve us well, and it’s these very habits that keep us from feeling good about ourselves.

But hey, recognizing this is the first step to kick-starting change.

In this article, I’m going to share with you 8 habits that might be bringing you down. It’s time to say goodbye to them and hello to a more positive you. After all, everyone deserves to feel good about themselves.

1) Negative self-talk

We’ve all done it. We’re often harsher to ourselves than we would ever be to someone else.

Negative self-talk is that little voice in your head that tells you you’re not good enough, or that you can’t do something.

It’s a habit many of us fall into without even realizing it. And let me tell you, it’s a tricky one to break.

But here’s the thing. Your words hold power, even when they’re only in your head.

When you constantly tell yourself negative things, you start to believe them. And this can greatly affect your self-esteem and how you feel about yourself.

So try to become more aware of your self-talk. And when you catch yourself being negative, stop and replace it with something positive.

After all, we should be our own biggest cheerleaders, not our own worst critics.

2) Not setting boundaries

Let me tell you a little story about myself. I was always the ‘yes’ person. Whether it was work, friends, or family, I always found it hard to say no.

At first, I thought I was just being helpful and accommodating. But over time, I realized this habit was taking a toll on my self-esteem and mental health.

I was constantly overworked, stressed, and felt like I had no control over my own time. This left me feeling drained and frankly, pretty bad about myself.

That’s when I understood the importance of setting boundaries. Saying no doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. It simply means you’re taking care of your own needs and well-being.

Setting boundaries can be tough initially, but trust me, it’s one of the most empowering things you can do for yourself. And once you start doing it, you’ll begin to feel better about yourself almost instantly.

3) Comparing yourself to others

In today’s digital age, it’s easier than ever to fall into the comparison trap. With just a few clicks, we can see the highlight reels of others’ lives on social media.

What we often forget is that these are just that – highlights. They don’t represent the full picture of someone’s life, just the bits they choose to share.

Did you know that research has shown a correlation between heavy social media use and lower self-esteem? That’s right, comparing yourself to others can actually make you feel worse about yourself.

Instead of focusing on what others are doing, shift your attention back to your own journey. Acknowledge your achievements, no matter how small they might seem in comparison to others. Remember, everyone’s path is different and unique.

4) Clinging to the past or future

One of the core teachings of Buddhism is the concept of living in the present moment. The idea is that suffering often comes from clinging to past regrets or worrying about future uncertainties.

In my book, “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego“, I delve into this concept in more depth.

But for now, let me share the gist of it with you. When we dwell on the past or stress about the future, we rob ourselves of the joy of living in the present moment.

This can leave us feeling unsatisfied and unhappy with our lives, impacting our self-esteem negatively.

Learning to embrace the present can be a powerful tool in feeling good about yourself. It allows you to appreciate who you are right now, not who you were or who you might become in the future.

It’s a journey, but one that’s well worth embarking on.

5) Failing to acknowledge your worth

I remember a time when I used to downplay my achievements, brush off compliments, and undervalue my worth. I thought being humble meant dismissing my own value.

But here’s what I’ve learned: acknowledging your worth doesn’t mean being arrogant or conceited. It means recognizing your value and not settling for less than you deserve.

And let me tell you, it took me a while to get there. But once I started acknowledging my worth, it was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

Believing in yourself and valuing your worth can go a long way in boosting your self-esteem and making you feel good about yourself. So don’t shy away from celebrating your accomplishments and recognizing your value. You deserve it.

6) Seeking validation from others

It might seem counter-intuitive, but constantly seeking validation from others can actually chip away at your self-esteem.

Sure, it feels good to be recognized and praised. But when we start relying on others to feel good about ourselves, we give them control over our self-esteem.

The truth is, the only validation that truly matters is the one you give yourself.

Learning to validate yourself might not be easy, but it’s essential for your self-worth. Start by recognizing your own achievements and strengths. Celebrate your wins, no matter how small they may seem.

Remember, you are enough just as you are. You don’t need anyone else’s approval to feel good about yourself.

7) Neglecting self-care

In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it’s easy to put self-care on the back burner.

We often prioritize work, family, and other responsibilities over taking care of ourselves. But here’s the catch – when we neglect self-care, we’re neglecting ourselves.

Self-care isn’t just about pampering yourself (though that’s a nice bonus). It’s about taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional health.

Whether it’s getting enough sleep, eating healthy, exercising, or setting aside time for relaxation and hobbies – all these aspects contribute to your overall well-being.

So if you can’t remember the last time you felt good about yourself, it might be time to reassess your self-care practices. Because when you take care of yourself, you’re telling yourself that you’re worth it. And that can do wonders for your self-esteem.

8) Not accepting yourself

At the end of the day, the most important habit to let go of is not accepting yourself.

You are unique, with your own strengths, weaknesses, quirks, and experiences. And that’s what makes you who you are.

Accepting yourself doesn’t mean ignoring areas you want to improve. It means acknowledging your current state without judgment and loving yourself regardless.

When you fully accept yourself, flaws and all, you free yourself from the shackles of self-doubt and negativity.

Remember, you are enough just as you are. Celebrate your uniqueness and embrace your individuality. Because there’s no one else quite like you.

Final thoughts: It’s all about self-love

At the heart of it all, feeling good about yourself really boils down to self-love.

It’s about treating yourself with kindness, acknowledging your worth, and embracing your unique self. It’s about letting go of habits that no longer serve you and adopting ones that uplift you.

In my book, “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego“, I explore the concept of self-love in depth and offer insights on how to cultivate it in your life.

But remember, self-love isn’t something that happens overnight. It’s a journey, one that requires patience, understanding, and acceptance. It’s about consistently choosing yourself, even when it’s difficult.

As you embark on this journey, know that it’s okay to take baby steps. It’s okay to stumble along the way. What matters is that you get back up and keep moving forward.

Because at the end of the day, there’s only one person who needs to truly love and accept you for who you are – and that person is you.

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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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