Lachlan Brown
Some people walk into your life and everything just clicks.
You don’t need to explain yourself. You don’t need to pretend. You don’t even need time, really — because somehow, even if you’ve just met, it feels like you’ve known them forever.
That’s the thing about kindred spirits. They don’t feel new. They feel familiar. Like meeting a memory you didn’t know you were carrying.
And if you’ve ever crossed paths with one, you know the feeling. There’s something quietly electric about it. Like your soul is exhaling. Like you can finally stop performing and just be.
What it really means to find a kindred spirit
This isn’t about fairytales or finding “the one.” It’s deeper and more subtle than that.
A kindred spirit is someone whose inner world resonates with yours. It doesn’t mean they’re the same as you — in fact, they might be wildly different on the surface. But beneath the differences, there’s alignment. Shared values. A mutual understanding that goes beyond logic.
Sometimes it shows up in friendships. Sometimes in romance. Sometimes, just in a single moment with a stranger. It doesn’t always last forever. But when it’s real, it leaves a mark that doesn’t fade.
I’ve met people who, within five minutes, felt more like home than those I’d known for years. And I’ve learned not to question that.
The connection doesn’t operate on time. It operates on presence. On energy. On recognition.
Why these bonds feel different
Psychologically speaking, we’re wired to seek belonging. But kindred spirits aren’t just about comfort — they’re about resonance.
Carl Jung talked about the idea of the collective unconscious — the belief that we all carry shared archetypes, patterns, stories. I think kindred spirits recognize something in each other from that space. A familiarity beyond biography.
Spiritually, it’s like your souls traveled similar paths, even if your lives didn’t. There’s this unspoken language between you. One that doesn’t need to be translated.
You might feel like you can say things without wrapping them in disclaimers. Or you sit in silence and it’s not awkward. Or you disagree, but still feel safe.
That’s the power of this kind of bond. It holds space for both sameness and difference. It doesn’t ask you to shrink. It invites you to expand.
10 signs you’ve found a kindred spirit
If you’ve ever wondered whether someone in your life might be a kindred spirit, here are a few subtle (but powerful) signs:
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You feel like you’ve known them forever — even if you just met.
There’s no need for small talk. You skip the usual steps and go straight into depth. -
You feel fully seen, not just understood.
It’s not just that they “get” you. It’s that they see the parts of you you rarely show — and welcome them. -
You can be quiet together.
There’s no pressure to fill the space. Their presence alone feels grounding. -
You’re challenged, not judged.
They don’t just echo your opinions. They invite you to grow — but in a way that feels supportive, not critical. -
You laugh harder and deeper with them.
Even serious conversations can break into lightness. Your humor lines up without needing explanation. -
Your energy syncs up.
You notice their moods, and they notice yours — not in a draining way, but in a naturally attuned way. -
They show up without being asked.
You don’t have to chase them for connection. It flows, effortlessly and honestly. -
You feel spiritually or emotionally in tune.
You might both believe different things — but you “meet” each other at a soul level. -
You feel inspired to be more yourself.
You’re not editing your words, tone, or interests. Being around them feels like a return, not a performance. -
When you part, something lingers.
Even after the conversation ends, they stay with you. Not in a clingy way, but like a warmth you carry.
Still, you don’t need to tick all the boxes. Often, it’s more of a felt sense than a checklist. But if several of these ring true, chances are, you’ve found one of the rare ones.
The paradox of kindred spirits
What I’ve learned is this: just because someone is a kindred spirit doesn’t mean they’re meant to stay.
Some show up for a season, and that’s enough. They appear right when you need them, leave something beautiful behind, and move on. Others stick around and become your lifelong anchor.
Neither is better. One doesn’t mean more than the other. What matters is the meeting — the recognition, the shift, the expansion.
In Buddhist teachings, this kind of connection can be seen as kalyāṇa-mitta — “spiritual friends” who help us along the path. Not necessarily in overt ways, but through presence. Through mirroring back to us something we’ve forgotten.
I talk about this in Hidden Secrets of Buddhism — how certain people help awaken parts of us we didn’t know were asleep. Not by fixing us, but by reminding us of what’s already within.
To finish
Finding a kindred spirit is not about completing yourself. It’s about remembering that you were never alone in the first place.
And in a world that so often rewards image over depth, finding someone who resonates with your soul — not your mask — is rare. But it’s also real.
So if you’ve found someone like that, don’t take it for granted. Nourish it. Be present with it. Speak truth into it.
Because in the end, it’s not about how long the bond lasts.
It’s about how deeply it touches the part of you that never quite fit anywhere else — until now.
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