Tina Fey
Appearing classy and cultured isn’t all about the expensive clothes you wear or the exotic vacations you take.
It’s often the subtle habits that we unknowingly hold onto that can make or break our impression.
The good news is, these habits can be changed.
With a little bit of awareness and some conscious effort, you can say goodbye to these behaviors and come across as more refined and sophisticated.
In this article, I’ll be sharing seven subtle habits that you might not even realize you have.
But once you ditch them, you’ll be amazed by how others start to perceive you.
As a relationship expert, I’ve seen how small changes can make a big difference in how people interact with each other.
1) Overuse of slang or informal language
It’s easy to fall into the trap of using slang or informal language, especially when you’re trying to fit in or feel comfortable in a new setting.
But the reality is, excessive use of slang can often come across as uneducated or unrefined.
The way we communicate forms a significant part of the impression we create.
And if you want to appear more classy and cultured, it’s time to pay attention to your language.
Now, I’m not suggesting you start using words like “indubitably” in everyday conversation.
No, it’s about striving for clarity and appropriacy in our language.
You’d be surprised how much more respect you can command by simply choosing your words wisely.
By avoiding heavy reliance on slang and adopting a more sophisticated vocabulary, you convey a sense of education and worldliness.
It’s not about using big words to impress, but expressing yourself clearly and appropriately for the situation.
It’s a small change that can make a big difference in how you’re perceived.
2) Overdressing or underdressing for occasions
This might seem counterintuitive, since dressing up is often associated with class and culture.
But the key here lies in the appropriateness of your attire.
Being overdressed can sometimes be as much of a faux pas as being underdressed.
It can make you look like you’re trying too hard or that you’re out of touch with the occasion.
On the flip side, being underdressed can make you seem careless or indifferent.
The trick is to find that ‘just right’ balance. It’s about understanding the occasion and dressing accordingly.
So if it’s a casual lunch, there’s no need to show up in a three-piece suit.
Likewise, if it’s an elegant evening event, sweatpants and sneakers won’t cut it.
A study published in the Journal of Business Ethics found that business casual attire was perceived more positively compared to casual or business formal styles, suggesting that appropriateness in dress significantly shapes social perceptions.
Being aware of this subtle balance can help you radiate a sense of class and sophistication without seeming out of place or pretentious.
3) Interrupting others while they’re speaking
Communication isn’t just about what you say, but also how you listen.
And one behavior that can quickly tarnish your cultured and classy image is interrupting others while they’re speaking.
This is a habit that many of us are guilty of, often without realizing it.
We get excited, we want to share our thoughts, and before we know it, we’ve cut someone off mid-sentence.
But the thing about interrupting is that it sends a message that your thoughts are more important than theirs.
It can come across as disrespectful and impatient – hardly the image of a cultured individual.
In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I discuss the importance of active listening in building healthy relationships.
Active listening involves fully focusing on the speaker, not interrupting, and responding thoughtfully.
It’s a skill that not only makes you more likable but also shows that you respect others and value their thoughts.
So, next time you’re in a conversation, remind yourself to listen more and interrupt less.
You’ll be surprised at how much this simple change can elevate your classy quotient!
4) Being glued to your phone
Let’s face it, we’re all a bit addicted to our phones.
But being constantly glued to your screen, especially when in the company of others, can send out a message that you’re disinterested or rude.
In this digital age, it’s important to know when to put down our devices and engage with the real world.
Whether it’s during a meal, a conversation, or even just a casual hangout, giving your full attention to those around you shows respect and also allows for more meaningful connections.
I remember once having dinner with friends and noticing that we were all more engaged with our phones than with each other.
It struck me how much we were missing by not being fully present.
As Albert Einstein wisely said, “I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.”
Now, I wouldn’t go as far as calling us idiots, but I do believe there’s wisdom in his words.
5) Neglecting personal hygiene
This may seem like an obvious one, but you’d be surprised how often it’s overlooked.
Personal hygiene plays a crucial role in how we’re perceived by others.
A study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health found that poor hygiene habits are risk factors for preventable diseases and social rejection.
Sure, a spritz of fancy perfume or cologne can make you smell nice, but it’s no substitute for a good old-fashioned shower and clean clothes.
I’ve noticed on numerous occasions how people who take care of their personal hygiene are perceived as more sophisticated and classy.
And it’s not just about smelling good, it’s about showing respect for yourself and those around you.
From brushing your teeth regularly to keeping your nails clean, these small habits can make a big difference.
Not only do they boost your self-confidence, but they also elevate you in the eyes of others.
6) Gossiping or speaking ill of others
It’s easy to get caught up in the latest gossip, especially when you’re trying to fit into a social circle.
But speaking ill of others or spreading rumors can quickly tarnish your image.
As Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.”
I’ve always tried to live by this quote.
Instead of getting involved in gossip, I focus on discussing ideas, events, and shared interests.
Not only has this helped me create deeper and more meaningful connections, but it’s also made me come across as more classy and cultured.
Remember, your words reflect your character.
By choosing to speak positively and constructively, you can elevate your image and command respect from those around you.
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7) Pretending to be someone you’re not
This might be the most important point yet.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of pretending to be someone you’re not just to come off as classy or cultured.
But let me tell you, there’s nothing classier than authenticity.
Research indicates that individuals who perceive themselves as authentic experience higher levels of well-being and positive functioning.
We’ve all been there, trying to fit into a certain image, changing our likes and dislikes based on who we are with.
But the truth is, it’s exhausting and it’s not sustainable.
People are drawn to genuineness.
They respect those who stand by their opinions and aren’t afraid to be themselves.
And believe me, it’s far more impressive to be remembered as someone real and authentic than as a copy of someone else.
So don’t be afraid to be you – with all your quirks, passions and individuality.
That authenticity is what makes you unique, and that’s something truly classy and cultured.
Embrace your authenticity
As we’ve navigated through these subtle habits, remember that the goal isn’t to fabricate a persona that isn’t you; it’s about refining the real you.
Embracing your authenticity while making mindful changes to your habits can help you project a more classy and cultured image.
The journey to becoming a classier, more cultured version of yourself isn’t always straightforward.
It requires introspection, self-awareness, and sometimes, even a few stumbles along the way.
But it’s a rewarding journey that paves the way for richer interactions and relationships.
As a relationship expert, I’ve observed how these subtle changes can significantly impact your interactions with others.
But more importantly, they can also shape how you perceive yourself.
I’d like to leave you with this thought-provoking video by Justin Brown.
He explores the complexities of finding a life partner, reflecting on his personal experience after a failed date and the lessons he learned.
From understanding the importance of shared values to the significance of growth and mutual support in a relationship, he shares his top insights to help you navigate the journey of finding a compatible partner.
I believe it’s an important watch as it ties in beautifully with our discussion on refining one’s habits and conduct.
Change starts within you.
A classier, more cultured version of yourself is waiting to be discovered.
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