If you want to be truly respected as you get older, say goodbye to these 8 behaviors

There’s a clear distinction between growing old and growing old with respect.

It’s not about the years you’ve chalked up, but how you’ve behaved throughout those years.

I believe that to be truly respected as you age, there are certain behaviors you need to leave behind.

In this article, let’s delve into the 8 behaviors to bid adieu if you want to age with grace and respect.

1. Embrace change

In the journey of life, change is inevitable.

As we age, we encounter numerous changes – in our bodies, in our environment, and in our relationships. It’s how we respond to these changes that define us.

The key to growing old with respect is to embrace these changes, not resist them.

When we resist change, we are seen as rigid, inflexible and stuck in our ways. This doesn’t earn us respect. Instead, it paints us as individuals unable to adapt to the shifting sands of time.

However, when we embrace change, we project an image of adaptability and resilience. We show that we are not only capable of surviving change but thriving amidst it.

By embracing change, you demonstrate a strength in character that commands respect.

As the famous psychologist Carl Jung once said, “We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.” 

2. Let go of grudges

Holding onto grudges is a surefire way to add years to your face and subtract respect from your persona.

I’ve had my fair share of conflicts in my life. At one point, I held onto a significant grudge against a friend who had wronged me. The bitterness and resentment consumed me, tainting my interactions and making me appear bitter and unforgiving.

One day, I decided to let go. I forgave my friend, not for their sake, but for mine. The weight lifted off my shoulders was immense.

I found that people respected me more when I demonstrated the ability to forgive and move on. It showed maturity, wisdom, and emotional intelligence – qualities we all admire in our elders.

Grudges don’t make you strong; they make you bitter. Forgiveness doesn’t make you weak; it sets you free.

3. Minimize your ego

One behavior that can hinder respect as you age is having an inflated ego.

Ego can make us defensive, unable to receive criticism, and prone to showing off – traits that are far from being respected.

In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I delve into the concept of ego and how it can impact our lives negatively.

We often associate ego with self-confidence, but there’s a fine line between being confident and being egotistical. Confidence attracts respect; ego, on the other hand, repels it.

By minimizing your ego, you allow room for empathy, understanding, and humility, traits that are truly respected as we age.

As we grow older, it’s more beneficial to have an open mind rather than an inflated ego. Remember, a tree that is unbending is easily broken. Cultivate flexibility and humility to garner true respect.

4. Practice active listening

As we age, one of the most respected behaviors is the ability to actively listen to others.

Active listening is a crucial skill in all types of relationships and interactions. It’s about fully focusing on the speaker, understanding their message, responding thoughtfully, and withholding judgment.

Psychology tells us that people feel valued and understood when they are listened to. When you listen actively, you’re not just hearing words; you’re showing respect for the speaker’s experience and perspective.

Active listening also allows you to learn from others, which is a sign of wisdom and humility – two traits widely respected in older individuals.

The next time you find yourself in a conversation, practice active listening. You’ll be surprised at how much respect you’ll gain just by truly hearing what others have to say.

5. Admit when you’re wrong

Here’s a counter-intuitive behavior that garners respect as you age: admitting when you’re wrong.

In our society, being wrong is often seen as a weakness. But in reality, admitting our mistakes shows a level of self-awareness and humility that commands respect.

Nobody is right all the time. As we age, we need to accept that we’re still capable of making mistakes and learning from them.

When we admit we’re wrong, we show that we value truth over ego. We demonstrate that we’re open to growth and learning – even in our older years.

6. Show empathy

Empathy is a powerful tool in gaining respect as we age.

It’s the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s about putting yourself in someone else’s shoes and seeing things from their perspective.

When we show empathy, we create connections with others on a deeper level. We show that we value their feelings and experiences. This kind of understanding and compassion is highly respected in our society.

Moreover, empathy allows us to respond to others in ways that are genuinely helpful and supportive rather than dismissive or judgmental.

7. Practice gratitude

Gratitude is a transformative habit that can command respect as we age.

It’s simple: every morning, take a moment to reflect on what you’re grateful for. It could be something as significant as the love of your family, or as small and simple as a cup of warm coffee on a cold morning.

This practice shifts the focus from what’s wrong in life to what’s right, from lack to abundance. It cultivates positivity and resilience, qualities that are highly respected in older individuals.

Moreover, practicing gratitude can help us maintain a positive attitude even in the face of adversity or difficulty. It reminds us of the good in our lives and helps us keep things in perspective.

8. Maintain integrity

Integrity is a trait that never goes out of style and is deeply respected, especially as we age.

Integrity means staying true to your principles, being honest in all your dealings, and doing what’s right even when no one is watching. It’s about aligning your actions with your values.

People with integrity are trusted and respected because they’re dependable and consistent. They don’t bend their principles to suit the situation; instead, they stand firm in their beliefs.

Strive to maintain your integrity as you age. It might not always be the easiest path, but it’s the one that earns genuine respect.

Final reflections: Aging with respect

As we journey through life, growing older is inevitable. But growing older with respect? That’s a choice.

The behaviors we’ve discussed aren’t just about gaining respect from others, but also about respecting ourselves. They’re about cultivating a life of integrity, humility, and wisdom.

In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I delve into these principles further, exploring how we can live fulfilling lives while minimizing our ego.

So, as you reflect on these behaviors, remember: it’s never too late to change. It’s never too late to say goodbye to old behaviors and embrace new ones.

Whether you’re in your 30s or your 70s, you have the power to shape how you’re perceived. So why not choose respect? Why not choose to be the person who is admired and looked up to as they age?

In the end, earning respect as we get older isn’t about being perfect. It’s about striving to be better. It’s about acknowledging our flaws, learning from our mistakes, and continuously growing.

So here’s to aging with grace, wisdom, and a whole lot of respect.