​​If you want to be a more likable person, say goodbye to these 10 behaviors

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Want to be more likable? It’s not as hard as you might think. Sometimes, it’s about what you stop doing.

In this article, we’ll look at 10 behaviors that could be getting in your way. Getting rid of these can really help you make a better impression on others.

Let’s find out what they are and start making some easy changes!

1. Stop Complaining All the Time

Nobody likes a constant complainer. If you’re always talking about the bad stuff, it can bring others down.

Sure, we all have tough days, but try to not let complaining be your go-to conversation. Instead, try talking about good things or even just listening more.

You’ll be surprised how this small change can make people enjoy your company a lot more. 

2. Ditch the Phone When You’re with Others

Ever been in the middle of a chat and the other person won’t stop staring at their phone? It doesn’t feel great, right?

So, here’s a tip: When you’re with someone, give them your full attention. Put that phone away.

I started doing this a while ago, and trust me, it makes a big difference. People really appreciate it when they see they’re more important to you than a screen. It’s a small thing, but it shows you care.

3. Cut Out the Gossip

Let’s be real for a second – gossip can be tempting. We’ve all been there, sharing a juicy story about someone else.

But here’s the hard truth: gossiping can hurt, and it often backfires.

When you talk about others behind their backs, people start to wonder what you say when they’re not around. It damages trust. I’ve learned this the hard way.

Being someone who doesn’t spread gossip makes you a lot more trustworthy and, honestly, a better friend.

4. Don’t Try to Be the Smartest in the Room

You don’t always have to be the smartest person in the room. In fact, constantly trying to show off your knowledge can actually put people off.

It’s great to be smart and share what you know, but there’s a fine line.

The real key? Be open to learning from others and acknowledging when you don’t have all the answers.

This approach makes you approachable and also encourages a genuine exchange of ideas, where everyone feels valued.

5. Avoid Being Overly Negative

I’ll be honest, I used to be someone who saw the glass as half empty. But I’ve realized being overly negative can be a real downer for the people around you.

It’s okay to feel down sometimes, but constantly seeing the worst in everything can push people away.

I started to focus on finding at least one positive thing in every situation, no matter how small.

This shift in perspective not only helped me feel better, but also made me more enjoyable to be around. Remember, a little positivity can go a long way. 

6. Stop Making Everything About You

This is a tough one, but it needs to be said: not everything is about you. I had to face this truth myself.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of turning every conversation back to your own experiences or problems.

But here’s the raw deal – doing this can make you seem self-centered and uninterested in others.

It took me a while to realize that listening and focusing on the other person’s thoughts and feelings is crucial.

This isn’t just about being polite; it’s about genuinely caring for others. When you start doing this, your relationships become deeper and more meaningful.

7. Don’t Always Avoid Conflict

This might sound a bit strange, but hear me out: You don’t always need to steer clear of conflict.

We’re often told that being agreeable and avoiding disagreements is the way to be likable.

But avoiding conflict can sometimes mean you’re not being honest or authentic.

Healthy, respectful disagreements are a part of life and can lead to growth and better understanding.

The key is how you handle these moments. Approach disagreements with respect and a willingness to listen, and you’ll be surprised how it can actually strengthen your connections with others, not weaken them.

8. Quit Trying to Please Everyone

I learned this the hard way: You can’t please everyone, and that’s okay.

For a long time, I tried to be everything to everyone, and it was exhausting. The truth is, when you try to please everyone, you often end up losing a bit of yourself.

Plus, people can usually tell when you’re not being genuine. It’s been freeing to accept that it’s fine not to be liked by everyone.

Focus on being kind and true to yourself. The right people will appreciate you for who you are, not who you’re trying to be for them.

9. Stop Ignoring Your Own Needs

Constantly ignoring your own needs for the sake of others doesn’t make you more likable; it can lead to burnout and resentment.

I’ve been there – always saying yes, never setting boundaries, and it left me feeling empty and unappreciated.

It’s crucial to understand that taking care of yourself is not selfish. In fact, when you’re healthy and happy, you’re in a much better position to be a good friend, colleague, or partner.

Start by setting some boundaries and honoring your own needs and feelings.

It’s not only good for you, but it also sets a healthy example for the relationships in your life.

10. Drop the Need for Constant Control

This one hit me hard: Letting go of the need to control everything. I used to think that if I could manage every detail, everything would be perfect.

But life doesn’t work that way. Trying to control everything can make you tense and difficult to be around. It’s exhausting for you and those around you.

Learning to let go and trust others, to accept that some things are just out of your hands, was a game-changer.

It reduced my stress and also allowed others to feel more relaxed and valued in my presence.

Embrace a bit of unpredictability – it can make life, and you, a lot more enjoyable!

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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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