Lachlan Brown
How we express ourselves matters a lot. The words we use can either elevate us or bring us down in other people’s eyes.
Using the wrong phrases can make us come across as less classy or intelligent than we are.
But here’s the good news: by being aware of the phrases that could potentially lower our perceived intelligence, we can avoid them and make a better impression.
In this article, I’ll be sharing 10 phrases that could undermine your image, and what to say instead. This isn’t about deception; it’s about being mindful of how our words reflect on us.
Let’s dive in.
1) “I’m bored”
This might seem like a harmless statement, but it can actually make a bad impression.
Here’s the thing: classy and intelligent people are never bored. They see opportunities for learning and growth in every situation. They’re curious, fascinated by the world around them. They can always find something to engage with, even in seemingly dull circumstances.
So when you say “I’m bored”, it might come across as though you lack curiosity or the ability to engage with what’s around you.
Instead of saying “I’m bored”, try expressing interest in something, or ask a question about the topic at hand. It’ll show that you’re engaged and curious – both signs of an intelligent, classy person.
2) “I’m not good at…”
Confession time: I used to be guilty of this one. I’d often say things like “I’m not good at technology” or “I’m not good at math”. It was almost like a get-out-of-jail-free card, an excuse not to try.
But I realized that saying “I’m not good at…” was more than just a cop-out. It was also painting me in a negative light. It made me seem unwilling to learn, to grow, and that’s far from the truth!
Classy, intelligent people know that skills can be learned and improved with effort.
Instead of saying “I’m not good at…”, now I say something like, “I’m still learning about…”, or “I could use some practice with…”. It’s a small change in wording, but it makes a big difference in how others perceive me – and how I perceive myself.
3) “Like”
The word “like” has a place in our language. It can be used to express enjoyment or approval, or to draw a comparison. But when it’s used as a filler word, it can become problematic.
Consider this: According to a study conducted by the University of Pennsylvania, excessive use of filler words such as “like”, “um”, “so”, and “you know” can make a person appear less competent and confident.
Classy, intelligent people tend to speak clearly and directly, with minimal use of filler words. If you find yourself using “like” as a crutch in your sentences, try pausing instead. It might feel strange at first, but it will ultimately make your speech sound more thoughtful and articulate.
4) “I hate…”
Strong words like “hate” can be jarring and often leave a negative impression. Classy and intelligent individuals tend to express their dislikes or disagreements with more tact and less emotional charge.
Instead of saying “I hate this song”, consider saying “This song isn’t really to my taste.” It’s less harsh, more refined, and it opens up room for a conversation rather than shutting it down with a strong negative statement.
Remember, the goal isn’t to suppress your feelings, but to express them in a way that displays emotional intelligence and respect for differing opinions.
5) “Whatever”
Dismissive phrases like “whatever” can create an impression of indifference and lack of engagement. It’s often perceived as rude and can make you appear uninterested or uncaring.
Classy, intelligent people value the art of conversation and understand the importance of showing respect to the person they’re engaging with.
If you find yourself tempted to shrug off a conversation with a “whatever”, try replacing it with something more constructive. For example, if you disagree with someone’s point, you could say, “That’s an interesting perspective, but here’s how I see it…”. This shows that you’re open to dialogue and respectful of other viewpoints.
6) “It’s not fair”
Life is full of ups and downs, and not everything goes according to plan. It can be tempting to voice our frustrations by declaring, “It’s not fair”.
But here’s some heartfelt advice: classy and intelligent people understand that fairness is subjective, and life isn’t always balanced. They acknowledge their disappointments but also strive to learn from them and move forward.
Instead of saying “It’s not fair”, try expressing your feelings in a more constructive way. “I’m disappointed with how things turned out” or “I was hoping for a different outcome” can convey the same sentiment without resorting to the negativity of “It’s not fair”. It shows resilience and emotional maturity, qualities that are highly regarded as classy and intelligent.
7) “I can’t”
There was a time when “I can’t” was a frequent visitor in my vocabulary. Whether it was tackling a complex project, trying out a new recipe, or even starting a fitness routine, I’d often find myself saying “I can’t” even before giving it a try.
But over time, I’ve realized the power words have over our actions. Saying “I can’t” instantly shuts down possibilities and closes doors. It’s limiting and self-defeating.
Now, instead of saying “I can’t”, I prefer to say “I’ll try” or “I’ll give it my best shot”. This simple shift in language encourages a growth mindset and opens up a world of possibilities.
The way we talk to ourselves matters. And if we want to be seen as classy and intelligent, we need to speak words of potential, not limitation.
8) “I know”
You might think that saying “I know” would make you seem smarter. After all, it shows that you’re informed, right? Not necessarily.
Saying “I know” too often can actually create the opposite impression. It can come across as arrogant or closed-minded, as though you’re not open to learning anything new.
Classy and intelligent people are lifelong learners. They’re aware that there’s always something more to learn, and they’re open to gaining new knowledge and perspectives.
When you’re tempted to say “I know”, consider saying, “That’s interesting,” or “I hadn’t thought of it that way.” It shows that you’re open-minded and always ready to learn – qualities that are highly valued in classy, intelligent individuals.
9) “But I…”
Starting a sentence with “But I…” can often come across as defensive or self-centered. It can seem as though you’re not really listening to the other person, but just waiting for your turn to speak.
Classy and intelligent people understand the value of active listening. They know that good communication involves understanding and responding to the other person’s perspective.
Instead of jumping in with “But I…”, try saying something like, “I understand where you’re coming from. Here’s another perspective to consider…”. This shows that you’ve heard and acknowledged the other person’s viewpoint, and are adding to the conversation rather than just defending your own position.
10) “This might sound stupid, but…”
This is probably the most crucial phrase to eliminate from your vocabulary. When we preface our thoughts or ideas with “This might sound stupid, but…”, it instantly undermines our credibility and intelligence.
Classy and intelligent people understand the value of their thoughts and ideas. They present them confidently, without apologizing for their opinions or insights.
Ditch the disclaimer. Your thoughts are valuable and worth hearing. Just say what you want to say.
Language, a reflection of the mind
The English writer and lexicographer Samuel Johnson once said, “Language is the dress of thought.” It’s through our words that our thoughts take form and become visible to others.
When we choose our words carefully, it not only influences how others see us, but it also shapes our own mindset and how we view ourselves.
In the quest to be perceived as classy and intelligent, the first step is to cultivate a vibrant internal dialogue. When our thoughts are positive and constructive, it naturally reflects in the language we use.
As you navigate through conversations and interactions, remember – your words are a mirror reflecting your mind. Choose them wisely.
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