If you use these 8 phrases every day, you probably have high self-esteem

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We all have those days when we look in the mirror and think, “I wish I could be more confident.” 

I’ve been there, battling self-doubt and second-guessing my every move. 

But what if I told you that self-esteem isn’t some elusive treasure; it’s something you can build every day through the words you use? 

By utilizing 8 simple phrases in your daily conversations, you’ll not only sound more confident — you’ll start to feel it, too. 

Trust me, a little change in your language can make a big difference in your life. Let’s dive in!

1) “Thank you.”

You know that awkward moment when someone pays you a compliment and you don’t know how to respond? 

Maybe you’ve even brushed it off with a self-deprecating joke or changed the subject quickly. 

I too used to squirm in discomfort. But people with high self-esteem have a simple, yet powerful way to deal with compliments: they say, “Thank you.”

That’s it — no caveats, no downplaying their achievements, just a gracious “Thank you.” These two words reflect a profound sense of self-worth. 

When you genuinely accept a compliment, you’re acknowledging your own value and allowing yourself to bask in that positivity, even if it’s just for a moment.

Practicing this seemingly tiny gesture of saying “Thank you” can be transformative. You’re not just expressing gratitude to someone else; you’re also giving yourself permission to believe in your own greatness. 

2) “I disagree, but I’d love to hear more about your perspective.”

Ever been in a heated discussion where you feel like your point of view is getting steamrolled? It’s natural to want to stand your ground

But here’s what true confidence in yourself and your beliefs sounds like: “I disagree, but I’d love to hear more about your perspective”.

This is where the phrase “I disagree, but I’d love to hear more about your perspective” comes into play. 

Saying this not only asserts your own position, but also opens the door for a constructive dialogue. 

It shows that you’re secure enough in your own beliefs to entertain another viewpoint without feeling threatened. 

People with high self-esteem use this phrase as a tool for growth and to broaden their understanding. 

They know that their worth is not tied to always being right but is built on a foundation of constant learning and open-mindedness. 

3) “I can help with that.”

You know that moment when someone is struggling and you think, “Hey, I could step in and make a difference here?” But then, doubt or shyness holds you back. 

There have definitely been times when I second-guessed myself like this, worried I’d end up messing things up.

However, people with a strong sense of self-worth don’t hesitate. 

It’s not because they’re 100% certain of everything — noone can have that. There are always chances of mistakes happening. 

But self-esteem gives you the understanding that missteps don’t redefine your self-worth — they only mean a mistake has happened! And you can correct it.

The phrase “I can help with that” does more than offer assistance; it’s a declaration of capability and goodwill. It says you’re confident in your own skills and you’re willing to contribute them. 

So, next time you see a chance to lend a helping hand, go for it. Say, “I can help with that,” and watch how it positively impacts both you and those around you.

4) “I don’t know, let’s find out.”

Picture this: you’re in the middle of a discussion and someone asks you a question you can’t answer. It’s easy to feel embarrassed or even a bit defensive, isn’t it? The pressure to always know the answer can be intense. 

But if you’ve got high self-esteem, you embrace these moments as opportunities, not shortcomings.

“I don’t know, let’s find out,” is a phrase that turns ignorance into a journey of discovery. Instead of viewing a lack of knowledge as a flaw, you see it as a chance to learn something new. 

What’s more, you invite others to join you on this learning adventure.

People with high self-esteem often use this phrase because they aren’t threatened by not knowing. 

They recognize that nobody has all the answers, and that’s perfectly okay. What matters is the willingness to seek out those answers.

5) “That was my mistake. How can we fix it?”

We all experience it — the dreaded moment when you realize you’ve messed up. Your stomach churns, and it’s tempting to pass the blame or sweep the error under the rug. 

Saying “That was my mistake. How can we fix it?” is a powerful way to navigate these tricky situations. 

First off, you’re taking responsibility, which is always the first step toward resolution. 

But then you’re also extending an invitation to problem-solve together, which shows leadership and a commitment to making things right.

People with strong self-esteem understand that mistakes don’t define them; it’s how they handle those mistakes that reveals their character. 

And let’s be real, it’s incredibly liberating to admit a fault and then actively seek a way to set things right.

The next time you find yourself at fault, try using this phrase. Not only will it likely improve the situation, but it will also boost your self-esteem by proving that you have the maturity and courage to address and fix your own mistakes.

6) “You did such a great job.”

We’ve all been there, watching someone pour their heart and soul into something and thinking, “Wow, they’re really giving it their all.” But how often do we take the moment to actually voice that admiration? 

Those with high self-esteem frequently do, using heartfelt phrases like, “You did such a great job.”

This simple acknowledgment goes a long way. Not only does it lift up the other person, but it also reflects your own confidence and emotional intelligence

You’re secure enough in yourself to give credit to others, recognizing that their achievements don’t diminish your own.

When you say, “You did such a great job,” you’re not just passing along a casual compliment. You’re affirming the value of hard work and commitment. 

It’s a moment of genuine connection that fosters positive feelings and builds stronger relationships.

7) “I need some time for myself.”

It sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Yet for many, the idea of carving out time for themselves feels like a luxury they can’t afford. 

I know I’ve been there, caught in the whirlwind of responsibilities and social commitments, forgetting to recharge my own batteries. 

Since I’ve started working on my self-confidence, I use this phrase as a declaration of self-care. 

It’s a message that you understand the importance of recharging, both for your sake and for those around you. Because let’s be honest, when you’re run-down, you’re not the only one who feels it.

Those with high self-esteem use this phrase to set a boundary, a pause button that allows them to return to their tasks and relationships with renewed energy and focus. 

It’s not a sign of weakness or selfishness; it’s a hallmark of someone who knows that they are at their best when they are well-rested and centered.

8) “I forgive myself.”

There’s something incredibly humbling and liberating about saying these three words: “I forgive myself.” 

It’s as if a weight lifts off your shoulders, freeing you from the shackles of past mistakes or shortcomings. And you know who I often hear saying this? People with high self-esteem.

Forgiveness isn’t just for others; it’s an internal gift you can give yourself. Saying “I forgive myself” isn’t about glossing over mistakes or avoiding accountability. 

Rather, it’s an act of self-compassion. You’re acknowledging that you, like everyone else, are human and prone to imperfections.

People with high self-esteem understand that lingering on past mistakes only hinders growth. They know that self-punishment doesn’t lead to improvement; it only cultivates self-doubt. 

By forgiving themselves, they make room for growth, learning, and further self-improvement.

So the next time you find yourself wallowing in regret or self-blame, try giving yourself compassion. You may be surprised at the sense of freedom and empowerment it brings, allowing you to move forward with greater self-assurance and resolve.

Building your self-esteem through conscious language

I used to think that self-esteem was something you either had or didn’t have. But I’ve realized it’s more like a muscle that needs consistent exercise. 

One of the most effective ways to build this ‘muscle’ is through the conscious use of empowering language.

It’s not just about what you say to others, but also what you tell yourself. 

Whether it’s affirming your own abilities, acknowledging and rectifying your mistakes, or showing compassion towards yourself, the words you choose can elevate you from a place of self-doubt to a position of strength.

Remember, each time you use these 8 phrases, you’re doing more than just communicating; you’re actively shaping your self-esteem, influencing how you see yourself and how others perceive you. 

So choose your words wisely — they’re the building blocks of your self-worth and a testament to your evolving self-esteem.

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Tina Fey

I'm Tina Fey, the founder of the blog Love Connection. I've extremely passionate about sharing relationship advice. I've studied psychology and have my Masters in marital, family, and relationship counseling. I hope with all my heart to help you improve your relationships, and I hope that even if one thing I write helps you, it means more to me than just about anything else in the world. Check out my blog Love Connection, and if you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter

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