Pearl Nash
Do people tell you that you have a really strong personality, or that you come off as intimidating most of the time?
While you’d rather be unapologetically yourself most of the time, there’s a growing awareness that your personality is scaring people away. Especially men.
Today we’ll look at 6 signs that confirm your strong personality is indeed scaring men away.
1) They’re mostly quiet around you.
In casual settings, people tend to speak more with people they’re comfortable with.
Likewise, in formal settings, people also tend to speak up more in order to make an impression around those they’re comfortable with.
However, when you’re with a group of people, do you find that the conversations suddenly become contrived before they die down into silence?
You find that the men around you may agree with what you say, but after a short while, they start to keep to themselves or move away.
It’s almost as if they’re afraid to offend you and would rather avoid that confrontation altogether.
Or perhaps they aren’t sure what to say as well, because they’re not sure what your reaction may be.
The thing is, when you leave, you may notice that the chatter resumes again. They come back as a group and the conversation flows once more.
If you relate to this, it’s likely that your personality is so strong it drives men away.
2) They tend to agree with your opinions.
Now men are usually more opinionated and will share their views readily – which isn’t a bad thing. Regardless if their views align with yours, they’ll always be ready with some form of opinion.
But somehow when they’re around you, they tend to keep their opinions to themselves and agree with yours instead.
You may not even need to build a strong case, you could just share your views and they’ll readily agree.
Perhaps you may have wondered if it was actually that easy to convince people – even men – to agree with you.
It may just be due to the way you deliver your opinion, in a no nonsense, straightforward way.
There may have been people who disagreed with what you said, but your strong personality resulted in them not pressing the matter further.
If you recognize this happening to you, it’s clear that you’re someone who intimidates. Others think twice before disagreeing with you, which is good when you want to be someone who doesn’t get taken advantage of.
However, it’s also healthy to have people share differing views (appropriately, of course) to invite alternative perspectives on a topic.
3) They’re more relaxed when you’re not around.
Do people tend to tense up when you’re nearby?
Maybe a group of people sense you approaching and you notice that they’re immediately on their guard.
Men who usually attempt to hide their apprehension of others will somehow show this on their faces.
They will respond tactfully to you, but there’s something about the interaction that’s forced and not sincere at all.
You may even get the sense that the group you’re with would prefer if you left them to their own devices.
Conversations become a bit more stilted when you’re around and eventually, you may start feeling left out.
While there’s nothing wrong with having a strong personality, everyone reacts differently to this and some may not take it too well.
You could try breaking the awkwardness or tension with jokes so that you can come across as a bit more approachable.
4) They talk behind your back.
The thing about rumors is that they eventually find their way back to the person in question. And it’s not a very nice thing to experience.
Have you ever come across rumors of people warning others to stay away from you? Or that you’re generally not a very pleasant person to work/hang out with?
Others may have an even more sinister motive – to take you down because they see you as a threat.
Sometimes, men don’t take too kindly to women who are perceived to be more assertive than them. And because of this, they may gossip and talk crap about these women behind their backs.
Especially if these women tend to perform much better than them in the workplace.
If you can relate to this, it’s likely that you have a really strong personality and this intimidates those who aren’t able to handle someone like you.
5) They can’t maintain eye contact with you.
When you speak to people, do you find that not many are able to maintain eye contact with you?
They may hold your gaze for a few seconds but then avert their eyes.
You, on the other hand, have trained yourself well to hold someone’s gaze when you’re talking to them. It’s characteristic of your strong personality.
However, not many people can match this level of confidence.
Even men who are bigger with a more intimidating physique may not be able to hold your gaze while talking to you, because of the way you carry yourself.
6) They feel threatened by you.
Just being in the room makes others uncomfortable – especially men.
When you speak, you may notice that the people around you get very defensive. Even if you’re just harmlessly stating an opinion, they may take offense.
If you’re in a meeting, the people around you will be on their toes and you may also notice that the men may start to rebut you or highlight the flaws in your presentation, just so that they won’t look bad.
It could also stem from the fact that they take whatever you say as a threat to their reputation and image because of your strong personality.
Concluding thoughts
While having a strong personality does impact the way people perceive you, it shouldn’t deter you from being yourself.
However, it’s also important (and helpful) to get along with the people around you and there should be a good balance between being yourself and maintaining good relations with others.
