A loving and healthy relationship is something many couples strive for. Unfortunately, sometimes, your relationship isn’t quite what you imagined it would be. Or so it seems.
If you’ve been thinking about the course your relationship is taking lately, it might be time to take a step back and look at it objectively.
For that reason, we’re learning what signs show that your relationship is more robust than you think.
1) You admire and appreciate each other
This means you really like and value different things about your partner. It’s like you have a list of their awesome qualities or actions you think are great, and you make sure to let them know.
This could be praising their kindness, recognizing their achievements, or simply recognizing the everyday things they do that make you happy.
When you admire someone, you look up to them in a positive way. And when you appreciate them, you’re thankful for the good stuff they bring into your life.
After telling my wife today that I admire her resilience and her empathy for others, she said she admires my go-getter spirit. We appreciate the things each of us brings to the table.
But in our marriage, there’s also a healthy dose of independence.
2) There’s healthy independence
While being a team is crucial, preserving a sense of independence is equally important. When we support each other’s dreams and give space to grow, the relationship stays fulfilling and dynamic.
Many couples don’t realize that they aren’t joined at the hip like Siamese twins and that they don’t have to do everything together.
In my opinion, each partner should have friends they meet with independently if they want to. The same goes for hobbies and activities.
For example, I love spending my time building R/C cars. On the other hand, my wife couldn’t care less about it. She has her own hobbies and interests.
But at the same time, we’re careful not to spend too much time apart and love spending quality time together, too.
3) You have resilience in tough times
Life is like a roller coaster with ups and downs. Resilience is like having a strong seatbelt and a supportive friend sitting next to you.
When things get tough, instead of falling apart, you and your partner can hold on tight, support each other, and navigate through the twists and turns together.
Your relationship is stronger than you think if you have the strength to face problems, learn from them, and come out even stronger on the other side.
But life isn’t all about overcoming things that get thrown your way; there should also be playfulness and spontaneity.
4) There’s spontaneity
Imagine you and your partner deciding to go for a surprise picnic in the park. You didn’t plan it days ahead; it just popped into your minds, and you thought, “Why not?”
That’s spontaneity! Adding spontaneity to your relationship brings joy and freshness, with unexpected moments of fun.
Embracing spontaneity keeps the relationship fresh and exciting. Whether it’s a spontaneous day trip, a surprise gesture, or trying something new together, it adds an element of unpredictability that injects joy and enthusiasm into your life.
5) You make surprise gestures
Speaking of surprise gestures, small surprises, like heartfelt notes, buying favorite treats, or a spontaneous date night, show that you’re thinking about your partner.
These gestures are exciting and show your appreciation for each other, keeping the relationship spirited and full of positive energy.
For example, I often let my wife sleep in while I get up around 5 or 6 am with our son.
But I also surprise her with a delicious breakfast in bed on a random morning. I hope it shows how much I appreciate her and that it adds a lovely, unexpected touch to the day.
6) You have shared hobbies
I already mentioned that each partner should have their own hobbies, right? But having common hobbies or interests is a natural way to connect and spend quality time together.
One of the signs of a solid and healthy relationship or marriage is a shared love for a specific activity, like hiking or cooking.
That’s because these shared experiences strengthen your bond and give you enjoyable moments to look forward to.
7) You apologize and forgive
In any relationship, misunderstandings happen. Being able to apologize when necessary and forgive each other is crucial.
That way, you create a space for growth, learning, and moving forward without holding onto negativity.
Early on, I learned that willingness to forgive and let go makes for a healthier and more resilient bond.
I mean, what’s the point in remembering negative things and holding grudges, right? It hurts you much more than it does the other person, anyway.
Do people not get that?
8) You learn from disagreements
Disagreements are also a normal part of any relationship. We all have our opinions on things, and sometimes, they differ from our partner’s opinion, right?
So, what matters is how you handle these disagreements.
In fact, this is key. Do you argue and get upset, or do you talk about it calmly? Most of the time, you’ll need to find a compromise – maybe you can take turns doing something or finding a solution that’s good for both of you.
Try to go for that win-win.
9) You create traditions
Are you making special, regular things that you both enjoy and look forward to doing together?
Establishing traditions like a weekly movie night, a special anniversary celebration, or taking a yearly trip to a favorite spot creates a sense of continuity.
Traditions add a cozy and comforting aspect to your relationship, and they’re a way to celebrate your bond in your own special way.
I really believe these are vital in any relationship, and most couples have them. But I’ve also seen couples who don’t have any, and I kind of feel sorry for them.
Traditions bring partners together. Going to each other’s family for holidays is all fine and well, but you need to make your own traditions too.
If you want to visit the family during the holidays, that’s great. But then choose other days in the year for your own traditions.
10) You’re building friendships
My wife is my best friend, but there’s always space for other friends. I love meeting new people, talking, and finding common ground.
If you find that you’re not just a couple but also love building meaningful friendships with others, it’s a sign that your relationship is stronger than you might realize.
This means you and your partner aren’t solely dependent on each other for social connection and support. Instead, you’re both comfortable and open to expanding your social circles.
Life without friends isn’t worth living, and people with 5+ friends are 60% happier!
11) You plan your future
My biggest fear in life is that we’re building this great life together, but someday, our marriage will fall apart.
I’ve seen it many times. Couples have kids, buy a nice home, and everything looks perfect. Yet, in a couple of years, they file for a divorce, and everything they’ve built together is in vain.
My parents did it in their previous marriages, and my sister also got divorced. It’s almost like it’s inevitable for so many couples. Too many.
But nevertheless, discussing and planning for the future together signals a commitment to a shared journey.
Whether it’s setting short-term goals, making plans for a vacation, or imagining long-term aspirations, it creates a sense of unity and purpose. It reinforces your connection and shared vision for the future.
It also spreads positivity and an optimistic outlook on life despite the short-term setbacks you might have.
12) You’re spreading positivity
If you‘re spreading positivity in your relationship, it means that you’re actively promoting a happy and uplifting atmosphere.
To me, spreading positivity means being a source of joy, kindness, and encouragement to my wife.
For example, we regularly give genuine compliments to each other. Or I help out with chores without being asked after I’m done with my work (she’s a SAHM).
There are many ways you can spread positivity, right?
The key is finding what brings joy, understanding, and fulfillment for both of you and as a family.