Isabella Chase
There’s a world of difference between being loved and being taken for granted.
This difference boils down to appreciation.
Being taken for granted in a relationship means your efforts and emotions are not appreciated, while your flaws are magnified.
Being loved, on the other hand, is about acknowledging efforts, understanding emotions, and accepting flaws.
Knowing the signs that you’re being taken for granted can be tricky, however.
Close relationships have a way of blinding us to behaviors that might otherwise be obvious.
That’s where we come in. Today, we highlight some indicators that can help you identify if you’re being undervalued in your relationship.
Let’s dive in.
1) Unreciprocated efforts
In any relationship, effort is a two-way street. It’s like a dance, with both partners moving in sync to maintain harmony.
But sometimes, one person stops dancing.
Be it making plans, resolving conflicts, or even simple gestures of affection, if they are mostly one-sided, it’s time to take note.
In a healthy relationship, both parties contribute equally.
If this balance is tipped consistently in favour of the other person, it’s likely you’re not being appreciated for your efforts.
This isn’t about keeping score but maintaining mutual respect and appreciation.
Understand that everyone has off days, but if this becomes a pattern, it’s a red flag.
2) Lack of acknowledgement
Once, in a past relationship of mine, I noticed a disturbing pattern.
I would often go out of my way to do nice things for my partner.
Little things, like picking up their favorite dessert on my way home or giving them a comforting massage after a long day.
But increasingly, these gestures went unnoticed and unappreciated.
At first, I brushed it off thinking they were just preoccupied with their own thoughts or tired from work. But eventually, the pattern became clear.
I was being taken for granted.
My efforts were not being acknowledged. Can you relate to this?
If so, it could be one of the signs you’re being taken for granted in your relationship.
It’s not about expecting a grand celebration for every small thing you do. It’s about feeling seen, feeling appreciated.
3) Always on the back burner
When you’re in a relationship, it’s natural to want to spend quality time with your partner.
However, if you continuously find yourself at the bottom of their priority list, it’s not a good sign.
The importance of quality time in a relationship is well-documented.
A study conducted by the University of California found that couples who spend quality time together are more likely to have a stronger and happier relationship.
Does your partner always seem to have something ‘more important’ to do, or do they only seem to have time for you when it’s convenient for them?
Well, if so, it’s a clear sign they’re taking you for granted.
A relationship is about mutual respect and consideration.
If they can’t make time for you, it might be time to reconsider the position they hold in your life.
4) Lack of communication
Communication is the backbone of every relationship.
It’s through communication that we express our feelings, air our grievances, and resolve our issues.
However, if you find yourself in a situation where your partner hardly ever initiates conversation or doesn’t seem interested in what you have to say, it’s a troubling sign.
It’s even more concerning if you feel that your thoughts and feelings are constantly dismissed or invalidated.
Everyone deserves to have their voice heard in a relationship.
5) You’re always the one apologizing
Apologizing for the sake of peacekeeping, or because your partner refuses to own up to their mistakes, isn’t healthy.
It’s a sign that your feelings are not being respected and valued.
A relationship is about balance and mutual respect.
When your partner consistently fails to acknowledge their wrongs or never takes responsibility for their actions, then they might be taking advantage of your goodwill.
6) You feel alone even when you’re together
Do you often feel like you’re alone despite being in a relationship?
Well, it’s another heartbreaking sign that you’re being taken for granted.
Being in a relationship should make you feel cherished, heard, and valued.
It’s about sharing your life with someone who appreciates your presence and cherishes your companionship.
7) Your needs are often overlooked
I remember a time when I was in a relationship where my needs were constantly overlooked.
I love art and find great joy in visiting art galleries and exhibitions.
But my partner had no interest in art and never made an effort to join me or understand why it was important to me.
Instead, our weekends were always spent doing things they loved.
A relationship should be about mutual understanding and compromise, not a one-sided affair.
Your needs and wants are just as important as your partner’s.
If they fail to recognize this, it might be time to have a serious conversation about the state of your relationship.
8) They rarely express gratitude
Gratitude is a small word with a big impact.
A simple ‘thank you’ can make all the difference in acknowledging someone’s efforts and making them feel valued.
Whether it’s cooking a meal, doing the laundry, or listening to them talk about their day, every small effort you make deserves at least some acknowledgment.
If your efforts are constantly going unnoticed, it’s not a good sign.
9) You’re constantly feeling drained
Relationships require effort, no doubt. But at the end of the day, it should never leave you feeling constantly burdened or emotionally drained.
If you find yourself feeling this way more often than not, it’s time to reevaluate your relationship.
Remember, your happiness and peace of mind are paramount. Don’t let anyone, not even your partner, compromise that.
Final thoughts: It’s about self-respect
The journey of recognizing and understanding that you’re being taken for granted in a relationship is often a tough one.
However, it’s important to remember that your worth is not defined by how others treat you but by how you respect and value yourself.
It’s okay to voice out your feelings, and it’s okay to demand respect.
It’s okay to walk away from situations that drain you more than they enrich you.
Every individual deserves to be in a relationship where they feel loved, valued, and never taken for granted.
