There’s a thin line between self-care and selfishness. It’s perfectly fine for someone to prioritize their interests, as long as they’re not ignoring yours in the process. But what happens when it’s all about them, all the time?
That’s when you’re dealing with a deeply selfish man. And trust me, it’s not always easy to spot.
You might be wondering, “How can I tell if he’s really that selfish?” Well, there are certain signs that can give him away.
In this article, I’m going to share with you seven signs that indicate you’re dealing with a man who’s more interested in his own needs than yours.
If these signs sound familiar, you might just be dealing with a deeply selfish man.
Let’s dive in.
1) It’s all about him
Let’s face it, we all love to talk about ourselves. But there’s a stark difference between sharing and dominating the conversation.
When you’re dealing with a deeply selfish man, you’ll notice that he’s always the star of his stories. It’s his world, and you’re just living in it.
He’ll often steer the conversation back to him, disregarding your feelings or experiences. His interests, opinions and achievements will often overshadow yours.
This is a classic sign of selfishness. If he’s always center stage and fails to recognize your existence beyond his needs, then it’s time to reconsider.
A healthy relationship involves give and take. If it’s always about him, that’s a red flag waving right in front of your face.
Be aware and don’t let his one-sided narratives blind you to his deeply selfish nature.
2) Your needs are always on the backburner
I still remember my first encounter with a deeply selfish man. We were dating and in the beginning, everything seemed perfect.
One day we decided to go on a road trip. I was excited and had planned a list of places I wanted to visit. However, as we hit the road, I soon realized it was all about his interests.
He chose the music, the route, even the food without any consideration for my preferences. My list was quickly disregarded and when I expressed my disappointment, he brushed it off saying that his choices were ‘better’.
This was a clear sign. Every time I expressed my needs or desires, they were pushed aside for his convenience or preference.
In a healthy relationship, your needs should be just as important as his. If you find yourself constantly compromising while he’s not making any sacrifices, then you’re dealing with a deeply selfish man.
3) He lacks empathy
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s a key ingredient in any successful relationship.
But when dealing with a deeply selfish man, this trait is often noticeably absent. He struggles to step into your shoes and see things from your perspective.
This isn’t just a character flaw, it’s also a scientifically recognized feature of narcissism. According to research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, individuals who display higher levels of narcissism are often deficient in empathy.
If he’s dismissive of your feelings, seems indifferent to your pain, or simply can’t comprehend why you’re upset, it could be a sign that you’re dealing with a deeply selfish man.
A relationship without empathy is like a ship without a compass. It’s only a matter of time before it gets lost at sea.
4) He never admits he’s wrong
Imagine being in a relationship with someone who never admits they’re wrong. Frustrating, isn’t it?
That’s another sign of a deeply selfish man. He will go to great lengths to avoid admitting that he may have made a mistake or been in the wrong.
Apologizing requires humility and acknowledging that he’s not perfect. But for a selfish man, his ego often gets in the way. He would rather defend his actions, dismiss your feelings, or twist the facts than admit that he was wrong.
This lack of accountability can be detrimental to any relationship. It can lead to resentment, hurt feelings, and a breakdown in communication.
Remember, everyone makes mistakes. What matters is how we handle them. If he can’t admit when he’s wrong, it’s a glaring sign of his deep-seated selfishness.
5) He takes more than he gives
Reflections on my past relationships bring me back to a particular ex. We were together for quite some time, and I genuinely thought he cared. But there was always this nagging feeling that I was giving more than I was receiving.
Whether it was time, effort, or emotional support, I always found myself on the giving end. Birthday gifts, special occasions, even simple date nights – it felt like I was making all the effort.
It took me a while to realize that he was taking advantage of my generosity. His ‘thank you’ was often followed by another request. It was a never-ending cycle.
In a relationship, it’s normal to give and take. But if you’re constantly giving and all he does is take without reciprocating your efforts, then you’re probably dealing with a deeply selfish man.
Don’t ignore this sign. In the long run, this imbalance can leave you feeling emotionally drained and unappreciated.
6) He’s not there when you need him
When you’re in a relationship, it’s comforting to know that you have someone who will be there for you in good times and bad. But with a deeply selfish man, this is often not the case.
He might be all smiles and laughter when things are going well, but the moment you need emotional support or a shoulder to lean on, he’s nowhere to be found.
His absence during your times of need is a clear indication that he’s more concerned about his own comfort than your wellbeing.
It’s easy to be present when everything is going smoothly. But the true test of character comes when the storm hits. If he’s not there for you during your toughest moments, then it’s a sign that you’re dealing with a deeply selfish man.
7) He doesn’t respect your boundaries
In any relationship, respect for personal boundaries is paramount. It’s a sign of mutual respect and understanding.
If a man consistently crosses your boundaries, it’s not just disrespectful, it’s a display of his deep-seated selfishness. He values his wants and needs above your comfort and personal space.
Whether it’s disregarding your need for alone time, making decisions that affect you without your input, or simply not respecting your physical space, such behavior is a clear indication of his selfishness.
Remember, your boundaries are important. Anyone who truly cares about you will respect them. If he doesn’t, it’s the most important sign that you’re dealing with a deeply selfish man.
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