Adrian Volenik
When I was a kid, I thought every adult was composed and mature. Even twenty-year-olds seemed to be at least a little bit wise.
Now that I’m an adult, I realize that most other adults have no idea what they’re doing with their lives. They’re unhappy; many are in their second marriage or divorced, and their kids are a mess.
That’s why I appreciate when I meet a wise and mature person for a change. They’re simply different, and their behaviors stick out.
What are these behaviors I’m talking about? Well, you’re about to find out.
1) They can wait without losing their cool
Most people these days are incredibly impatient. They want everything now. But patience is more than waiting. It’s also about keeping your cool and having a positive attitude while waiting.
Mature people understand that some things take time, and they don’t let impatience sabotage their progress.
For example, to start making good money often takes years and years of hard work. You need to learn many new things and often rise through the ranks of a company.
Yet, the prevalent images on social media are luxury cars, expensive possessions, and beautiful homes.
That’s why we now come to expect these things (much) sooner rather than later. Immature people don’t want to put in the hard work.
2) Instead of flipping out, they stay cool when things get tough
Wise and mature people don’t let stress or challenging situations dictate their reactions. They retain composure, think clearly, and go through difficulties without unnecessary drama.
For instance, when confronted with a health concern, a wise and mature person doesn’t let fear dominate their mindset.
They research their options, consult with professionals, go for a second opinion, and approach the situation with a proactive and composed attitude.
3) They genuinely hear what you’re saying
It’s hard to find a good and genuine listener who won’t want to steer the conversation to themselves every chance they get.
A person who is a good listener doesn’t just hear your words. They pay attention to the emotions behind them. They make you feel heard, valued, and understood.
Mature people check all of these boxes. They’re thoughtful and want to hear your story and all its intricacies.
That’s why when you meet a person like that, you don’t want to bore them to death with all your problems at once (no matter how tempting).
You want them to stay your friend and find out just how messed up you are way down the road.
4) They don’t jump to conclusions or criticize; they’re open-minded
Being non-judgmental means they don’t quickly label you or your actions. Instead of casting blame, they genuinely strive to understand the reasons behind behaviors.
If someone makes a mistake at work, a wise and mature person wouldn’t immediately blame them.
Instead, they’d examine the circumstances, understanding that everyone can have an off day or face unexpected challenges.
And when someone expresses a different political or cultural viewpoint, they won’t immediately label them as wrong or misguided.
They’d engage in a respectful conversation to understand the underlying values and experiences that shape those people’s perspectives.
They care more about getting your perspective than proving their point.
5) They’re not stuck in their ways
As people get older, many often get stuck in their ways. I see this all the time. Their mentality hasn’t changed for years if not decades, and they just aren’t open to new ideas.
However, wise people have a flexibility of thought and are willing to adapt. Unlike those who become set in their beliefs and habits, these people remain open to new perspectives, ideas, and ways of doing things.
Their mental agility helps them evolve, learn, and grow continuously, unbound by rigid patterns of thinking or behaviors that delay personal development.
6) They own up to their actions instead of blaming others
Choosing to own up to their actions instead of pointing fingers is a sign that someone is pretty mature.
It’s like saying, “Yeah, I messed up, and I’m not going to blame someone else for it.”
When I imagine wise and mature people, I imagine them as drivers who are behind the steering wheel of their own lives.
They don’t need to pretend it’s someone else’s fault if the car crashes or things go a bit sideways.
If you can’t do this as a bare minimum but have to go looking for all sorts of excuses for your actions, you aren’t mature and an adult, no matter how old you are.
7) They don’t dwell on the past
They don’t get stuck in what happened before. They focus on the now and the future. For example, I missed out on a significant career opportunity in the past.
And although I thought about it for some time, I didn’t constantly regret the missed chance. Instead, I focused on my current strengths and explored new opportunities that aligned much more with my skills and interests.
Although you should say yes to as many opportunities as you can, you shouldn’t take all of them. You should skip those that don’t align with your values.
Sometimes, you just need to leave money on the table and not let money blindside you.
I just wanted to illustrate that mature people don’t spend too much time thinking about their past and their regrets or missed chances.
When one door closes, another one opens, right?
And this next behavior compliments this one perfectly too.
8) Instead of complaining, they look for ways to fix things
A wise and mature person doesn’t get stuck in a cycle of complaints or negativity. They direct their attention to finding practical solutions and approach challenges with a mindset that stresses resolution and results over lamentation and crying.
If there’s one thing you should take away from this article and from the way mature and wise people behave, it’s that you shouldn’t wait for others to fix issues.
You need to always take the initiative and deal with it yourself: Roll up your sleeves and dive into solutions.
Be the person who doesn’t just point out what’s wrong with things but one who’s all about how do we make it right.
9) They don’t boast or act like they know it all; they’re down-to-earth
Think of that person who doesn’t go on and on about their achievements. They don’t need to shout from the rooftops about how great they are.
Instead, they let their actions do the talking, and they appreciate others’ achievements just as much.
And have you ever met someone who acts like they’ve got the answer to everything? Well, a wise and mature person is the opposite:
They’re open to learning from others and don’t pretend to be the walking encyclopedia.
10) They feel what others are feeling and show they care
And, of course, no mature and wise person is cold or indifferent to other people and their feelings.
They’re just really good at understanding how people are doing emotionally. In other words, they can put themselves in your shoes, something that many people still can’t or won’t do.
They can sense when you’re happy, sad, or just having one of those “meh” days.
11) They’re curious and always looking to expand their knowledge
They’re the kind of person who is always curious about how things work, why things happen, and what makes the world tick.
They don’t shy away from asking questions because they genuinely want to understand.
And above all, they’re not afraid to admit when they don’t know something. Instead of pretending to know it all, they embrace the opportunity to learn.
Asking questions, for them, is a sign of strength and a way to bridge gaps in their understanding.
That’s why you’ll always find them engaged in meaningful conversations. It’s not just small talk; they’re genuinely interested in what others have to say.
Their questions go beyond scratching the surface, diving into the heart of the matter, and uncovering different perspectives.
12) They see the glass as half full, even when things are challenging
Most mature people have been through things in life. That’s one of the reasons they’re so wise and mature in the first place, right?
But they’re also the types who focus on the good stuff, even when faced with challenges. It’s like they’ve got this built-in optimism that helps them stay positive and hopeful instead of getting dragged down by problems.
