Mia Zhang
Do you ever have those days where joy seems like a distant memory? We all do.
Here’s the kicker.
You may not realize it, but certain behaviors could be standing between you and your happiness.
If you’re sitting there thinking, “When was the last time I truly felt joy?” then this is for you.
Ready to wave goodbye to those joy-stealing habits?
Let’s dive into these 7 behaviors that might be sucking the happiness out of your life.
1) Negativity
We all have that little voice inside our head. The one that likes to focus on the bad rather than the good. This is called negativity, and it’s a joy-killer.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of negative thinking. We dwell on our mistakes, criticize ourselves, and anticipate the worst.
But here’s the thing.
This constant stream of negative thoughts can actually make us more prone to stress and depression. It can even affect our physical health.
The truth is, you are in charge of your thoughts. Choose positivity.
2) Perfectionism
It’s a trait that I’ve personally struggled with. I used to think that everything had to be perfect. My work, my appearance, even my home.
Here’s what I learned.
Chasing perfection is exhausting. It’s like running on a treadmill that never stops. You’re always striving for something that’s just out of reach.
And the worst part?
It steals your joy. Instead of celebrating your achievements, you’re constantly focusing on what could be better.
That’s when I decided to let go of perfectionism.
Did it happen overnight? Absolutely not.
Every day, I remind myself that it’s okay to make mistakes. That it’s okay not to be perfect.
And guess what?
I’ve never felt more joy in my life.
3) Comparing yourself to others
Let me be honest. I used to be a serial comparer.
Whether it was my friends, my colleagues, or even those influencers on social media, I always found myself comparing my life to theirs.
I’d see their pictures and think “Why isn’t my life as exciting as theirs?” or “I should be more successful by now”.
Sound familiar?
Comparing yourself to others is like trying to measure the ocean with a teaspoon. It’s not only pointless, but it also takes away from your own unique journey and accomplishments.
The day I decided to stop comparing myself to others and start appreciating my own path was the day joy started flooding back into my life.
It wasn’t easy. But it was definitely worth it.
It’s time to climb out.
4) Overthinking
Ever find yourself stuck in a never-ending cycle of “what ifs” and worst-case scenarios?
That’s overthinking for you. It’s like a hamster wheel that keeps spinning, but it gets you nowhere.
Here’s what I realized about overthinking.
It doesn’t solve our problems or change the outcome of situations. All it does is drain our mental energy and steal our joy.
How do you put the brakes on this destructive habit?
Start by recognizing when you’re doing it. Then, consciously redirect your thoughts to something more positive or productive.
Trust me, your future joyful self will thank you for it.
5) Lack of self-care
Here’s something you might not know.
Your physical health has a direct impact on your emotional health. That’s right.
When we neglect self-care – whether it’s regular exercise, a balanced diet, or adequate sleep – our mood is likely to take a nosedive.
If you’ve been skimping on self-care and wondering why joy seems elusive, it might be time to reassess your habits.
Taking care of your physical health isn’t just good for your body, it’s essential for your joy too.
6) Holding on to the past
I used to carry my past around like a backpack filled with heavy rocks.
Each rock represented a mistake, a regret, or a past hurt. And let me tell you, it was a heavy load. It weighed me down and made it hard for me to move forward. And joy? It was nowhere in sight.
Then one day, I decided to unzip that backpack and start letting go of those rocks, one by one.
It wasn’t easy, and it didn’t happen all at once. But with each rock I dropped, I felt lighter, freer. And before I knew it, joy started to creep back in.
You are wondering why joy seems elusive?
Maybe it’s time to let go of some of those rocks.
7) Ignoring your passions
Here’s the bottom line.
If you’re not doing what you love, joy will always be elusive.
Passion fuels joy. It lights up our life and fills us with a sense of purpose.
When we ignore our passions and just go through the motions, we’re essentially snuffing out our own joy.
Ask yourself: “What do I love doing? What makes me feel alive?”
Then, make time for it.
Because the truth is, when you follow your passion, joy naturally follows.
The journey forward
With self-awareness and a bit of determination, these joy-stealing behaviors can be bid goodbye.
Begin by recognizing when these habits surface. Pay attention when negativity takes over, when you’re striving for perfection, or when you’re comparing your life to others.
Take note of those moments you catch yourself overthinking, neglecting self-care, holding onto past hurts, or ignoring your passions.
Once you’re aware of these patterns, it becomes easier to change course in real time.
Don’t forget to be kind and patient with yourself along the way. Celebrate the small victories, seek support when needed and remember, your joy is worth fighting for.
Remember, life is too short for anything less than joy. So here’s to saying goodbye to these behaviors and welcoming a life filled with more happiness and fulfillment.
