A large part of being in a relationship is knowing how to handle conflict with grace.
And the more challenges a couple can face together without breaking up, the more secure their relationship is.
If you and your partner survive these 7 conflicts, your relationship is rock solid (and you must never let them go).
1) Family drama
In an ideal world, we would have perfect relationships with our families.
But in reality, it’s more likely that your family will be critical of your partner, and your partner’s family will have something not-so-nice to say about you, too.
Perhaps your family doesn’t think highly of your partner for whatever reason, and your partner’s family doesn’t get along with yours.
It would be great if you can simply step away, but sometimes your hands are simply tied—maybe you live with your parents, for example.
Family drama, when it happens, tends to get ugly fast with people choosing sides and throwing their weight around. Weaker relationships tend to fare badly and have people reenacting the tragedy of Romeo and Juliet in real time.
So if the two of you were able to sail through a major family drama, congrats!
It means that the two of you are mature enough to discuss and deal with difficult situations.
It also means that you both always put your relationship with one another first, which is essential for having an enduring relationship.
2) Mismatched libido
Sex comes easy at the beginning of relationships. You don’t even think about it because it just always happens!
But with time comes familiarity and with familiarity comes boredom and resentment.
Perhaps one of you will start getting bored with the idea of sex and would rather sleep or read a book.
That would be fine, but unfortunately many of us see sex as almost foundational to a relationship.
You might feel unwanted and dejected if your partner gives you another “no”. On the flipside, you might feel guilty that you simply can’t get in the mood for your partner’s sake.
We are all doomed to eventually deal with mismatched libidos at some point in our relationships.
If you can manage to survive a dead bedroom, however, you can be sure that your relationship is quite secure.
It means that you have a healthy relationship with sexuality in the relationship, and that you are mature enough to deal with this conflict and find solutions to really address the problem.
Bonus points if at no point did either of you consider cheating.
3) Exes coming back
I’m not talking about those exes who have become genuine friends.
I’m talking about the problem exes who come knocking into your life clearly wanting to get back with you.
These are the ones who think of you as “the one who got away”, are desperate to win you back, and clearly don’t respect your boundaries.
And to make it worse, they’re often insufferably charming and, despite knowing that they’re bad news, not everyone can resist their pull.
If you’re able to survive this big challenge, that means you and your partner are for keeps.
It means the two of you have good communication skills— that you can talk about jealousy, boundaries, and trust in a healthy way. And of course, that you trust each other.
It also means that you have integrity and that you know your priorities and limitations.
4) Friends disapproving your relationship
For a lot of people, friendships can be just as dear to their heart as their actual family… or even more.
It’s just as important to get along with your partner’s dearest friends as it is to get along with their family.
Now this is normally no issue. But just like how family can sometimes turn out to be a minefield, so can friendships.
Some of your partner’s friends might start deliberately ignoring you or trying to give your partner “advice” to help them “see the truth” about you… and this could easily go south.
It would feel like you have to choose a side and can be quite stressful. It goes without saying that this can easily end your relationship.
If you could manage to stay by one other’s side despite your friends’ disapproval, then you’re certainly a strong team.
It should mean that you see something in each other that others just don’t see—and you’re willing to fight for your love even if it means losing some friends (if they’re really being difficult).
5) Money problems
Many people proclaim that love is all that matters, but they won’t be saying the same thing when money is tight.
That’s because money greatly affects relationships. In fact, financial problems are the leading cause for divorce.
Money problems can come in many different ways.
Maybe there’s a huge income gap between you and your partner, maybe one of you lost their job, or maybe both of you are one week away from being homeless.
All of these will put a strain on the relationship one way or another— from being broke stressing both of you out, to trust issues to power imbalance.
You can be certain that your relationship will last if it can survive this problem just fine.
It means you love each other enough to not let frustrations or insecurities over your money problems get to your heads.
It also demonstrates your teamwork, resourcefulness, and willingness to endure life’s hardships together.
6) Addiction
It’s safe to say that if something gives us pleasure of some kind, we can get addicted to it.
Social media, gambling, weed, alcohol, and shopping are all things that can get us addicted. And addiction—no matter the kind—brings its troubles to a relationship.
If you’re the one struggling with addiction, it can be painful to see your partner struggle trying to deal with your “lack of discipline” or “bad habits.”
If your partner is the one who is struggling with addiction, it can be infuriating trying to do everything you can to set them straight…only for them to fail and fail again.
And if both of you struggle with addiction, mercy on your souls.
Addiction is, unfortunately, not something you can just fix by yourselves. Depending on the kind of addiction you have and how severe it is, you will most likely have to rely on professionals to help break the habit.
That you can manage to stay together despite struggling with addiction means that you have the clarity of mind to take professional help without hating one another.
You’re both able to lead each other in the right direction because you truly care for each other.
7) One of you almost cheating
Perhaps one of the most chilling things you can ever hear is your partner admitting that they almost cheated on you.
It doesn’t matter that they managed to resist actually cheating on you—it will feel like a massive breach of trust!
After discovering that your partner almost fell in love with someone else, you might find yourself wondering just what it is that you lack.
It’s hard not to take it personally, of course, no matter how hard your partner might try to reassure you that it’s you that they love.
It will leave the hurt partner questioning whether they can still trust their partner…and whether or not they are truly meant for each other.
If your relationship can manage to survive this conflict, then it’s a testament to the love you have for one another.
Lesser people would freak out and do things they will regret.
But if you’re able to forgive each other and trust each other again, then you’re a strong couple.
It means you’re able to let go of your pride and ego because your love for each is all that matters.
Final thoughts
All in all, the biggest secret to having a healthy, thriving relationship is to be calm and mature.
Navigating all of these relationship troubles requires a level head and plenty of self-control.
There’s no doubt that love and passion are important, but love without maturity won’t last long.
Respecting one another and being emotionally mature, on the other hand, will ensure that your relationship will continue to thrive even long after the honeymoon high has faded and you both get tested by stressful situations.
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