The very thing you like in someone, I might find irritating as hell, and vice versa.
We all have different personalities and are compatible with different types of people.
Having said that, there are certain behaviors and qualities that are universally annoying in someone.
Here they are:
1) They’re conceited and think they’re better than you
They know it all, so don’t bother trying to explain anything to them.
Arrogance is infuriating because you know they aren’t all that, but they have a deep-seated belief they are the best thing since sliced bread.
That’s bad enough. But when they proceed to act holier than thou or look down on you — well, it’s maddening to the extreme.
There’s a very good reason that we appreciate humility in a person.
The bottom line — nobody likes a smart ass.
2) They’re constantly complaining and have a defeatist attitude towards everything
At first, you may pity them.
It’s a shame when someone is so consumed with negativity that they start to drown in it.
But it becomes increasingly annoying when you have to try to shield yourself from their non-stop moaning, bitching, and whining.
Regardless of what is going on for them, they’re always having the worst day ever.
They can quickly catalog a long list of trivial grievances that have put them in a bad mood.
Don’t even bother trying to suggest something that might help, they don’t want to hear it.
They’ve already got a dozen excuses to hand as to why there’s no point trying.
3) They’re judgmental about others (yet never toward themselves)
Closed-mindedness is a very unattractive trait.
The truth is that we can all get stuck in our ways, or assume we’re right (thanks confirmation bias!).
But when someone is habitually judgmental, they are training themselves to seek out the bad in life.
Which rather ironically only ends up weakening them by increasing stress levels, reducing immune system efficiency, and encouraging mental health issues.
On top of that, it makes you a narrow-minded jack-ass.
So unsurprisingly your relationships are bound to suffer because of it.
4) They’re malicious and lacking in compassion
Some people have been so jaded by life that they seek to poison everyone else too.
Spiteful and bitter people usually lack any form of compassion or empathy.
They are too wrapped up in their emotions to stop and think about their actions.
It can seem like they act purely out of cruelty, but it’s usually just a reflection of their own internal pain.
5) They’re oblivious
When someone is totally lacking in self-awareness, it can be incredibly frustrating. Because you cannot get through to someone like that.
They are blinded to themselves, their shortcomings, and the world around them. And that leads to ignorance on all sorts of levels.
They find it harder to see other’s points of view or show understanding. And they are unable to take a long hard look at themselves to make any positive changes.
Sadly, when you’re annoying but you can’t even see it, you’re stuck that way.
6) They’re pathetic and can’t do even the most basic things
I’ll be honest:
I wasn’t sure whether to include this one.
I had pangs of guilt considering whether it was cruel. Maybe it’s not their fault that they are useless.
But let’s face it:
Even though neediness isn’t always annoying, total helplessness can be.
But here’s the caveat:
Only when someone seems to flat out refuse to help themselves.
They take zero responsibility and expect others to pick up the pieces. They would rather play the victim and hope someone will sweep in to save them.
But they could be putting their time and energy to better use by learning some life skills.
7) They are self-centered and only consider their own agenda
I’m all for standing up for your own needs and wants.
There are too many people-pleasers out in the world who are unwittingly abandoning themselves to try to make others happy.
There’s no shame in saying no or needing to put yourself first.
But some people only ever seem to put themselves first.
They only do you a favor if there’s something in it for them. They show a general disregard for your well-being.
Their favorite topic is themselves. So they may talk your ear off, yet never listen to what you have to say.
8) They show off, brag, and attention seek
Okay, it comes from insecurity — but that doesn’t make it any less annoying to the outside observer.
Boasting and trying to win approval is very cringeworthy.
Rather than impressing others, you just come off as either big-headed or simply desperate.
It steals the limelight from others around you.
It’s ultimately an attention-seeking behavior, and like any other “look at me” action, it grows tiresome.
9) They’re dishonest
Hey, we’re all a little dishonest.
By that, I mean everybody tells some lies. The majority of which fall into the category of white lies which are usually used to spare people’s feelings.
All of us will also be economical with the truth from time to time when it serves us or gets us out of trouble.
But we’re talking about those lying ratbags who feel no guilt in spinning a web of deceit.
BS spills out of their mouths pretty much every time they open it.
Pathological liars will habitually embellish lies with plenty of details, constantly change their story, and act in ways that don’t match their words.
10) They’re rude
There are some really ugly character traits on this list.
So being rude could be considered mild in comparison. Yet this is one of the things that can wind us up the most about someone.
Manners are not pointless.
They are social cues that we use to get along. It’s how we show respect and build healthy connections.
That’s why when someone is incredibly rude to you, it’s so triggering.
It feels like a slap in the face because they are not showing you any courtesy.
11) They’re explosive and quick to anger
Aggression is not a good look on anybody!
Fiery temperaments can very quickly wear your patience thin.
Before you know it, they’re flying off the handle. The fireworks display may involve, shouting, insults, and general hostility.
There is no speaking to someone when they are in this state, so you’re unlikely to get anything resolved.
12) They’re controlling and bossy
Controlling and bossy people make their problem yours. They try to pass on their neurosis by tightening their grasp around you.
If you don’t do what they want, they will make it clear that they’re not happy.
They have an assumption that they know best, and don’t bother to listen to others before barking out their orders.
They show little to zero trust in the competence or capability of others and prefer to micromanage.
It’s pretty insulting.
13) They’re stingy
I had a friend once who I had to “break up with” because she was so unbelievably tight.
Now if that sounds like an overreaction — hear me out.
People who never put their hands in their pockets are taking advantage of you.
We all have to work for our money. Why are their time and resources more valuable than yours?
It makes you feel really uncomfortable having to always foot the bill.
And it may not only be with money that someone is stingy.
It’s equally as annoying when someone shows zero generosity with their time or energy too.
14) They’re manipulative and underhand
Sneaky people are the worst, right?
Their chosen weapon is usually psychological and emotional torment.
They love to dish out guilt trips. They enjoy twisting things to make you feel like you’re in the wrong. They have no problem gaslighting you until you back down.
And the worst thing is, they can be so covert, that you don’t always see it happening until much further down the line.
15) They’re hypocritical
Their motto is very much:
“Do as I say, not as I do”.
The very thing they chastise you about, they have done plenty of times before.
Look, I get it. None of us are perfect. And that’s actually ok.
But claiming to have higher standards or morals than is actually the case is what is really annoying.
16) They’re dismissive
We all want to feel heard and seen. That’s why it’s painful whenever we feel dismissed.
It’s like we’re being belittled.
When I was growing up, my dad had this really annoying habit whenever I asked a question.
He’d do this snort as if to say what I was asking was dumb. Or he would give me the answer in the most condescending way.
It made me feel so very small.
When someone doesn’t give us the time of day, ignores us, talks down to us, or is snide and sneering — it not only hurts, it’s also super annoying.
I am an annoying person
…at least sometimes.
I think most of us are.
We mess up, get lost in our own drama, and forget to be considerate of others.
It doesn’t make you a bad person for occasionally letting some of your annoying traits out.
But without beating ourselves up, it’s important to cultivate as much self-awareness as possible about how we behave.
That way we can strive to minimize our demons — for the sake of ourselves and those around us.