If someone displays these 10 behaviors, they’re truly in love with you

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Tess Thompson once wrote, “Do I have a choice? Doesn’t it happen with or without our consent? Falling in love, that is.”

Anyone who’s ever been in love can probably relate. Falling for someone is one of the most terrifying, awe-inspiring, magical emotions there are – and often, we feel as if we don’t even have a choice in the matter.

But falling in love is one thing; being able to tell if someone is in love with you is another story entirely.

Luckily for you, this article comes to the rescue!

If someone displays these 10 behaviors, they’re truly in love with you.

1) They can’t stop looking at you

People say that eyes are the door to one’s soul. If you were to ask someone in love whether they agree with that statement, they’d probably immediately say yes.

When people are in love, they simply can’t stop staring at each other. It’s like they’re so enamored with the beauty of each other’s faces that they’d prefer looking at one another over any masterful piece of art you can think of.

(I once thought a guy’s face was more beautiful than Vincent van Gogh’s The Starry Night. The things love does to a person…)

Social psychologist Zick Rubin has even discovered that while people usually spend 30-60% of their conversation looking at each other, couples in love go as far as 75%. It also takes them longer to look away when someone interrupts them.

So, a huge sign number one – if someone can’t stop staring at your face as if you were a magnificent piece of art on display in the Louvre, they’re most likely in love with you.

2) They find everything about you endlessly fascinating

When I’m in love with someone, I can listen to them talk about almost anything.

The entire history of Ancient Rome? Sure!

The differences between Suzuki and Yamaha motorbikes? Sign me up!

The pros and cons of living on Mars? I’m in!

Someone who’s truly in love with you will be super keen to look beyond the surface. They don’t only want your body – they want to connect with you on a deeper level, be it spiritual, emotional, or intellectual (or all three at once).

If you work in a bakery, they’ll be the first person to learn more about the science of making bread. If you’re a bookworm, they’ll ask you for book recommendations and then bond with you through reading the same stories.

Every single aspect of you is just completely fascinating to them.

3) They’re keen to spend time with you – even if they’re busy

The truth is, we’re all busy. There’s always something to do, something to look forward to, and something to put on the bottom of your to-do list.

A person in love will rearrange their day around you. And if they can’t – if they have a highly demanding job, for instance – they’ll text you often or spend hours thinking of you as they go about their day.

Have you ever had a friend who suddenly spent all their time with their new partner to the point where it almost seemed like they moved in with them?

Yep, that’s love-certified behavior.

If someone drops everything at your beck and call, if they always manage to find time for you even if they’re super busy, and if you seem to be the main person they want to spend time with…

Congratulations! That’s a genuine admirer right there.

4) They always try to close the physical gap between you

According to research, “Touch is the primary way people communicate intimacy in romantic relationships.”

When we realize just how many feel-good hormones we release during physical interactions with our intimate partners, it’s really not that surprising – for example, the “love hormone” called oxytocin increases when your partner so much as strokes your arm.

If you’re trying to gauge whether someone’s fallen for you, watch their movements. Do they lean toward you when you speak? Lightly brush against you when they walk by? Find excuses to hug you, hold your hand, or sit next to you?

It might be their way of trying to get as close to you as possible because they’re very much in love.

5) They speak in a higher voice when you’re around

I’ll be the first person to admit that I do this. It’s kind of ridiculous, yet I often can’t help it – my voice just naturally goes a bit higher when I fall for someone. It actually takes active effort to lower it back down.

Imagine my relief when I found out that I wasn’t weird – in fact, many women have this exact experience.

A 2011 study in the Journal of Evolutionary Psychology says:

“Because men find higher-pitched women’s voices more attractive, the voice pitch with which women speak to men may depend on the strength of their attraction to those men.”

When a woman’s voice pitch is naturally higher while she’s around you, it might mean she’s attracted to you. It might also mean more than that – she’s truly in love.

6) They try to make you laugh

Ready for more science?

A 2016 study found that humor boosts attraction – especially for women.

What can I say? We love funny guys.

And men know it. I once had a man tell me that the one thing that’d make him jealous would be “knowing you find another guy funnier than me.”

So, what does this tell us about love? Well, if a man is trying his best to make you laugh all the time… he might be so deeply in love that he automatically tries to boost your attraction toward him.

Plus, he most likely loves seeing your face light up.

7) They remember the little things about you

There’s no better feeling than realizing someone’s been truly paying attention to what you say.

And the good news is, people in love do it automatically! They’re so keen to get to know you that they store every piece of information about you in their memory, keeping it there for future reference.

If you love Kinder Bueno, they’ll make sure to remember it and buy it the next time they come over.

If you can’t stand Coca-Cola but adore Pepsi, they’ll remember that, too.

I mean, they’ll probably even remember that your auntie’s name is Elizabeth and she has three dogs.

This is because romantic infatuation has an impact on our cognitive ability. Research shows that our attention and memory are enhanced when it comes to our beloved ones.

Want to know if someone’s truly in love with you? Think of how well they remember the stuff you’ve told them.

8) They enjoy boring activities as long as you’re there with them

“Hey, I’m just going to quickly run to the store to get some groceries.”

“Oh, can I come?”

This is a common reaction of those who are in love – no matter what activity you’re doing, they’d simply love to join. Even if it’s so boring they’d never find it entertaining on their own.

And that’s because your presence is what makes it fun.

Grocery shopping? Yay, they’ll get to know what brand of chocolate is your favorite!

Walking the dog three times a day? You get to chat and enjoy the fresh air!

Preparing for exams together? A fun study session!

Everything’s simply better when you’re with them.

9) They talk about your future together

Falling in love is so scary because it comes with the realization that you’re getting attached to someone you can lose any second.

People aren’t made to be homes. They are rivers, ever-changing and ever-flowing. You can’t build a stable base around someone who will always grow into a new version of themselves. All you can do is accept that the future is uncertain.

Of course, people in love find that incredibly terrifying, and so they construct ideas of the future that involve you in order to give themselves some sense of control.

You’ll go to college together. You’ll move to the same state. You’ll have careers that work well together. You’ll travel the world. You’ll do this and that.

Falling for someone comes with the strong desire to keep them in your life forever.

10) They follow through on their promises

One of the most effective ways to know if someone’s truly in love with you is to keep the “show, don’t tell” principle in mind.

People say all sorts of things. They say they love you, they want to be with you, they can’t imagine their life without you, yada yada yada.

But if their actions don’t align with their words – if they don’t actually make the time for you, if they don’t ask you any questions about yourself, or if they keep prioritizing other people – their words are just that. Words.

Someone who’s in love with you wants to make you happy. What’s more, they care about your opinion of them, so they want to show up as the most reliable and loveable versions of themselves.

So, rule number ten – actions speak louder than words.

Denisa Cerna

Hi! I’m a fiction author and a non-fiction freelance writer with a passion for personal development, mental health, and all things psychology. I have a graduate degree in Comparative Literature MA and I spend most of my time reading, travelling, and – shocker – writing. I’m always on a quest to better understand the inner workings of the human mind and I love sharing my insights with the world. If any of my articles change your life for the better… mission accomplished.
Get in touch at denisacerna.writing@gmail.com or find me on LinkedIn.

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