Jelena Dincic
Tired of dating high-maintenance people?
Wondering how you always seem to go for the needy and attention-seeking type? Is there something wrong with you?
No, there isn’t! I’m here to assure you that it’s not your fault.
The thing is that there are many high-maintenance people out there and unless you know how to spot them, there’s a big chance you could end up dating them.
In this article, I’m gonna reveal the 12 behaviors that high-maintenance people display so that next time, you can avoid falling into the trap of dating them.
Here we go:
1) They constantly need to be reassured
If you’re thinking about going out with that cute coworker or friend of a friend but you’re not sure it’s a good idea, ask yourself: Are they needy?
Here’s the thing: When someone needs constant reassurance and external validation, it’s a big red flag that they’re high-maintenance.
But look, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t give them a chance. Maybe they have other qualities that will make up for the fact that they’re so demanding.
Keeping in mind that they’ll constantly be looking to you for validation and approval, weigh the pros and cons of going out with them.
2) They’re very materialistic
Now, this is another type of high-maintenance person, one I personally would be less tolerant of.
We all like to buy something nice every once in a while, but some people are so obsessed with brands and how much something costs that they’re a nightmare to go out with.
They’ll expect to eat at fancy restaurants and get expensive gifts.
And if you can’t afford expensive things?
They’ll probably lose interest in you fast, because let’s face it, they’re more into things than people!
3) Their expectations run high
So, what do I mean when I say, “High expectations”?
Well, for example, when you first start dating, they may want to keep in constant touch. I’m talking about dozens of texts a day.
And if you don’t reply to a text immediately (because you’re busy at work or something) they’ll start to panic and ask you why you’re ignoring them.
They could also expect you to spend all your free time with them and cancel any plans you have with your friends.
Or, they’ll expect you to introduce them to your parents after a few dates.
Basically, beware of people with unrealistic or overly demanding expectations.
4) They’ve got mood swings
The truth is that there are a lot of wonderful people out there who are emotionally unstable.
If you want to date one of them, you need to be prepared for the fact that they’re going to be unpredictable when it comes to their feelings and that they’ll require constant emotional support.
That means that you need to be strong and patient and willing to help them deal with their baggage.
If you’re not, it’s best not to lead them on.
5) They’re attention-seekers
At first, they may seem fascinating, daring, adventurous, outgoing, and fun.
But when you look closer, you’ll see that everything they do is calculated to make them the center of attention.
And when they aren’t?
When they don’t get the attention they so desperately crave?
They become upset and even unpleasant – probably something to do with not getting enough attention from their parents when they were kids.
Whatever the reason for their attention-seeking behavior, they’re sure to be super demanding.
6) They’re impulsive
Watch out for extremely impulsive people.
There’s a kind of romantic notion that impulsive people live life to the fullest but in my experience, being too impulsive means making a lot of bad decisions.
And when you’re in a relationship, those bad decisions can affect both parties.
In short: Impulsive people may seem fun in the beginning, but the fact that they don’t consider the consequences of their actions means they’re sure to be high-maintenance partners.
7) They lack independence
I’ll admit that it’s not always easy to tell when someone will end up being codependent in a relationship.
However, there are some signs to look for:
- They lack initiative and let others decide for them
- They’re financially dependent on others
- They never do anything by themselves
- They still live with their parents
Someone who lacks independence is sure to be high-maintenance in a relationship. They’ll rely on you for pretty much everything and will want to be with you 24/7.
Of course, this isn’t permanent. People change. They learn and they grow.
The bottom line is that if you take your chance on someone who lacks independence, you’re going to have to help them find it.
8) They have no boundaries
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – people need boundaries!
Boundaries are important because they protect us.
People who have a disregard for boundaries make terrible friends and terrible partners.
They’re pushy and intrusive and don’t take the other person’s feelings into consideration.
Whether it’s ordering another drink for someone who clearly said they didn’t want one or forcing someone to move faster in a relationship than they feel comfortable with, their lack of boundaries is sure to make the people around them feel uneasy.
9) They like to complain
Have you ever noticed that some people always find something to complain about?
I mean, come on, relax and enjoy yourself for once!
Well, those kinds of people are definitely not easy to be in a relationship with.
And guess what – you can be sure that they’ll find fault with you too and they’ll spend more time being dissatisfied and disappointed with your relationship than happy.
10) They’re inflexible
We all like getting our own way in life, but that’s not always possible.
Things don’t always go according to plan and we have to adapt.
And when it comes to relationships, if we want to be happy, we need to be ready to compromise.
Unfortunately, not everyone is ready to do that. Some people are so inflexible and stubborn that being in a relationship with them is frustrating.
In other words, if someone is inflexible and won’t budge, they’re sure to be high-maintenance.
11) They’re jealous and possessive
Anyone who’s ever asked themselves, “Why doesn’t my partner ever get jealous?” has clearly never been with a possessive type.
Jealousy really is a green-eyed monster and it can make a relationship unbearable.
And while it stems from their insecurity, dating a jealous person will mean being with someone who doesn’t trust you.
And on that note…
12) They have difficulty trusting people
Most of us have been hurt in the past.
Now, some of us have an easier time moving on than others.
Some people let the hurt and betrayal really get to them, so much so that they’re scared to open up to another person again. It just becomes really difficult for them to trust others.
And if you’re thinking that they’re high-maintenance in a relationship, you’re right.
They’ll constantly be questioning you and your relationship.
And apart from being jealous and suspicious of your true intentions, chances are they’ll constantly be looking for a reason to break up.
And there you have it, 12 behaviors that are bound to reveal a high-maintenance person. Good luck!
