If a woman uses these 7 phrases regularly, she is probably highly self-centered

There’s a fine line between being assertive and being self-centered.

When a woman is assertive, she expresses her thoughts and feelings openly, respecting her own needs as well as those of others. She’s transparent about her intentions.

But when a woman is self-centered, it’s all about her needs, her wants, her feelings – often at the expense of others. Her words often reveal more than she realizes.

As a relationship expert with Love Connection, I’ve noticed that certain phrases can be tell-tale signs of a self-centered personality. If a woman uses these phrases regularly, she’s likely tipping the scale towards self-centeredness.

We’ll explore these phrases in the article ahead. Pay close attention – these might just save you from some future heartache.

1) “Me, myself, and I”

In interpersonal relationships, balance is key. It’s about give and take, understanding and being understood.

But when a woman constantly uses phrases that start with “I”, “me” or “my”, it may point towards a self-centered personality.

“I want…”, “I need…”, “My opinion is…” – these are all phrases that focus solely on her needs, her wants, her perspective. They leave little room for others to share their thoughts or feelings.

Of course, it’s important for everyone to express their needs and views.

But if these phrases are used excessively, and rarely balanced with inquiries about others or acknowledgment of others’ needs and views, it may suggest that she is more focused on herself than on the relationship.

2) “You should…”

Surprisingly, phrases starting with “You should…” might also indicate self-centeredness.

On the surface, it may seem like she’s offering advice or trying to be helpful. But when uttered regularly, it could reveal a desire to control or impose her own beliefs and preferences onto others.

“You should do this”, “You should think like that”, “You shouldn’t feel this way” – these phrases subtly suggest that her way is the ‘right’ way, discounting the other person’s own thoughts, feelings, or experiences.

While it’s normal to share advice or opinions, an overuse of “You should…” can indicate a disregard for others’ autonomy and individuality, shifting the focus back to her own perspective and needs.

3) “No one understands”

In my experience, the phrase “No one understands” is a red flag. This phrase can be an indicator of a self-centered perspective.

When a woman frequently insists, “No one understands me” or “No one gets what I’m going through,” it can suggest a belief that her experiences and feelings are unique to the point of isolating her from others.

It’s a way of focusing attention solely on her emotions while invalidating the empathy or understanding others might offer.

This mindset can often lead to a cycle of emotional dependency, as she may constantly seek validation and understanding without reciprocating.

If you’re interested in learning more about this dynamic and how to overcome it, I delve into it more in my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship.

Remember, open communication and mutual understanding are essential in any relationship. But if the conversation always circles back to her and her alone, it’s a sign of self-centeredness.

4) “It’s not my fault”

A phrase that I’ve often noticed in my interactions with self-centered people is, “It’s not my fault.”

When a woman frequently uses this phrase, it may suggest an unwillingness to accept responsibility for her actions or mistakes. It shifts blame onto others and deflects attention away from her own role in a situation.

As Eleanor Roosevelt wisely said, “In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.”

Having the ability to accept responsibility for our actions is a mark of maturity and humility. If she regularly blames others and seldom owns up to her mistakes, it may be a sign of self-centeredness. After all, in her world, she can do no wrong.

5) “But enough about you”

One phrase I’ve come across in my work that can be quite telling is, “But enough about you, let’s talk about me.”

While this may not always be said verbatim, watch out for any phrases that dismiss the other person’s experiences or feelings in order to shift the focus back to her. It could be as subtle as consistently steering conversations back to her interests, successes, or problems.

In healthy interactions, conversations should swing like a pendulum, moving back and forth between individuals. If that pendulum seems stuck on one side, it’s probably because she’s holding onto it. And that can be a sign of self-centeredness.

6) “I deserve…”

Another telling phrase I’ve noticed in my work is “I deserve…”

While it’s important for everyone to recognize their worth and stand up for their rights, frequent assertions of “I deserve…” can denote a sense of entitlement.

This indicates that she believes she is inherently deserving of certain privileges or special treatment, regardless of her actions or contributions.

As the saying goes, “He who excuses himself, accuses himself.” In other words, if she always feels the need to assert what she deserves, it may suggest an inward-focused perspective that neglects the needs and feelings of others.

Recognizing self-centered behavior in others (or even in ourselves) can be a challenging but crucial step in building healthier relationships.

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7) “If it weren’t for me…”

An uncomfortable truth is that self-centered individuals often have a high sense of their own importance in the lives of others. This can be revealed through phrases like, “If it weren’t for me…”

“If it weren’t for me, this would never have happened,” or “If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be where you are now.” These statements not only inflate her role in the lives and successes of others but also downplay the efforts and accomplishments of those around her.

While it’s natural to feel proud of our contributions, it’s equally important to acknowledge the roles others play. If she consistently takes credit or exaggerates her impact without giving due credit to others, it may be a sign of self-centeredness.

Understanding and beyond

The power of language is undeniable. It can reveal the intricacies of our character, our intentions, and often, the state of our relationships.

Throughout this article, we’ve explored phrases that could indicate a self-centered personality in a woman. Recognizing these patterns can be the first step towards understanding and addressing such behavior.

However, it’s important to remember that these phrases are not definitive proof. We all have moments of self-centeredness – it’s part of being human. The key is to strive for balance, ensuring that we respect not only our own needs but also those of others.

As we wrap up, I’d like to share a video by Justin Brown that explores the complexities of finding a life partner. In this video, he shares personal experiences and valuable insights that I believe can help deepen your understanding of relationship dynamics.

Remember, understanding is power. By understanding self-centered behaviors and their implications, we can better navigate our relationships and foster healthier connections with those around us.

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Tina Fey

I'm Tina Fey, the founder of the blog Love Connection. I've extremely passionate about sharing relationship advice. I've studied psychology and have my Masters in marital, family, and relationship counseling. I hope with all my heart to help you improve your relationships, and I hope that even if one thing I write helps you, it means more to me than just about anything else in the world. Check out my blog Love Connection, and if you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter

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