Pearl Nash
Throughout my life, I have seen way too many women have their confidence knocked down over and over again.
Including myself.
But I’ve also seen women integrate those lessons and grow stronger and more resilient as a result. I’ve seen women thrive, live in harmony with their authentic selves, and stand up for what they believe in.
So, if a woman is truly confident… she’ll usually display these 10 behaviors.
1) She’s all about empowering other women
First and foremost, a confident woman won’t tear other women down just to make herself look better.
While society still tries to pit us against each other, those of us who are genuinely self-assured won’t stand for it.
We know that we’re not competing against each other. We’re on the same team.
If I see another woman flourish professionally, I cheer for her.
If I witness one of my friends finally finding the love of her life, I’m so happy for her that it’s hard to put it into words.
And if I’m friends with someone who’s objectively more beautiful than me, I don’t feel any bitterness whatsoever – on the contrary, I compliment her and marvel at how beautiful she is inside and out.
A woman with healthy self-esteem is so comfortable in her own skin that she doesn’t hesitate to spread kindness and empower other women to be their best selves, too.
2) She won’t settle for less than she deserves
Romantic relationships are hard. There’s no doubt about that.
But we can choose our hard. And what do I mean by that?
Well, look at it this way. Breaking up with someone you’re in love with is hard. But staying in a relationship that simply doesn’t work is hard in its own painful way, too.
It’s incredibly difficult to let go of what doesn’t bring out the best in you because in the midst of it all, you can’t imagine that you’ll ever fall in love again.
But that’s where true confidence comes into play. If you value yourself enough, you’ll understand that you’d rather be alone than with someone who doesn’t appreciate you.
You’d rather jump into the great unknown and see where you land rather than settle for less than you deserve.
3) She abides by the law of detachment
And speaking of letting go, I’ve met plenty of women who held on to things that simply weren’t good for them because they were too scared of uncertainty.
And I’ve also seen many of them slowly grow into themselves, embrace the power of detachment, and bravely leave the old chapter of their life behind.
So, what is the law of detachment exactly?
It’s what happens when you come to terms with the fact that you only have a limited amount of control over your life. If someone doesn’t cherish you, it means they aren’t meant for you, and there is relief and power in letting them go.
The same goes for jobs, friends, projects, or the life paths you choose to go down.
Sometimes, you just have to let things flow out of your life, process the loss, and move on.
Detachment is where your true power lies.
4) She handles rejection with grace
Since confident women tend to be masters at detachment, they also don’t crumble under the weight of rejection.
I’m not going to lie to you – it’s incredibly hard to be rejected. I hate it. It can do a number on your self-esteem, no matter how confident you are.
But the way you handle rejection and the feelings it carries matters a great deal. If you let it get to you, riddling you with self-doubt and self-loathing, you will only suffer as a result.
But what if you tweak your mindset?
What if you tell yourself, “What doesn’t want me isn’t meant for me. But the thing that is meant for me is out there in the world, and it will come when the time is right.”
In this way, you practice both the law of detachment and the law of attraction – by letting go of what doesn’t serve you, you are making space for something amazing to come into your life.
This is why confident women handle rejection with grace. It helps them grow in resilience, not self-doubt.
5) She’s in sync with her emotions – both positive and negative
The key to growing through rejection isn’t to suppress your emotions and refuse to cry.
On the contrary, a confident woman knows just how important every single emotion that passes through her body is.
And since she doesn’t shy away from the darker parts of her, she lets all those feelings come to the surface in a safe environment, embracing them and feeling them in their entirety.
She cries. She dances. She exercises. She writes it all down. She walks.
She does whatever she needs to do in order to process those emotions and show herself love at a time when she needs self-compassion the most.
Your negative feelings aren’t bad. They aren’t weak. They are an inherent part of who you are, and the best way to grow into yourself and become more confident is to accept all of yourself.
Even when it’s hard.
Especially then.
6) She prioritizes her well-being
As part of my daily routine, I spend a few hours before bed reading books. It’s the time when I get to fully relax and invest time into my favorite hobby before I go to sleep.
Of course, not everyone has time to read for two hours every night. But the point is that no matter how hectic life gets, a self-assured woman reserves a little bit of time for herself – be it twenty minutes or two hours – to calm down her nervous system and fully decompress.
This is because she knows how significant her personal well-being is. Everyone’s goal in life is to be happy, after all, and if you spend your whole life catering to other people’s needs – as many women are taught to do – how can you enjoy the life you’ve been given?
What’s the point?
Exactly. So, carve out a little bit of time for yourself today. Show yourself the love you deserve.
7) She makes choices for herself, not for other people
While we’re on the topic of catering to other people’s needs, it’s important to recognize that true confidence lies in making your own choices – and standing by them.
Deep down, you know what you want in life. You know which path you ought to take. Your parents, friends, or partner may be telling you otherwise, pressuring you to be this or that, but your gut instinct always knows best.
Listen to it.
8) She enjoys her own company
I’m an introvert, which means I recharge my social batteries when I’m alone. It therefore comes as no surprise that I spend a lot of time in my own company – and absolutely love it.
However, you don’t have to be an introvert to enjoy solitude.
No matter how much you thrive when you’re around people, having fun on your own is still a vital skill – one that shows just how comfortable you are in the safety of your own mind.
A confident woman will spend some time with herself from time to time. She will go on a walk, go read in a café, or do her skincare while watching her favorite TV show.
And she will have a blast.
9) She knows when to be independent and when to ask for help
This is a difficult one. Ever since I was a child, I’ve been taught that women are either fully independent or they fully rely on men to provide for them.
Over the years, I’ve had to untangle these two polar opposites and find my own balance in the middle. I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that sometimes, I will need help – and asking for it doesn’t make me weak.
On the contrary, recognizing that you could use a helping hand is very brave, especially in a culture where we put too much value on independence and too little on collaboration.
10) She can laugh at herself
Finally, a woman who is truly confident doesn’t take herself too seriously.
She knows that sometimes, she will get it wrong, and that’s okay. As long as she learns her lesson, what’s so bad about making a mistake from time to time?
Her mistakes don’t define her. Her willingness to always grow as a person does.
