Tina Fey
I used to think class and sophistication were something innate; an inherent trait certain people were born with. And I simply wasn’t among the lucky few.
However, as I entered my twenties and embraced womanhood in all its beauty, I realized that I couldn’t have been more wrong.
Sophistication had little to do with talent or luck. Really, it was about practice and confidence more than anything.
These realizations have led me to level up my own sophistication game, and as a result, I now feel more confident than ever before.
So, without further ado… If a woman displays these 9 behaviors, she radiates class and sophistication.
1) She speaks with intention
I used to be such a blabbermouth my friends had to tell me to just chill out for a second.
I talked and talked and then talked some more, but amongst all the words, at least half of them didn’t truly matter.
I overshared because I was nervous, not because I genuinely had something relevant to say. I was so scared of awkward silence that I’d rather run my mouth than let the words sit in the air.
But then I learned the number one rule of sophistication: speaking with intention.
When you mull your words over before you say them out loud, you actually seem more confident because the pauses in your speech signal that you’re not rushing anywhere – you’re fully comfortable in the here and now.
What’s more, thinking through what you’re about to say is a huge sign that you value your words, a quality that is very scarce yet very valuable nowadays.
Learn to embrace short silences. Thus the art of sophistication.
2) She goes after what she wants
A classy woman knows her stuff. She isn’t one to rely on others to get her by.
If she doesn’t know something, she’ll Google it. If she lacks the necessary skills, she either learns them or hires someone to get the job done for her.
Classiness goes hand in hand with knowledge because, as you probably already know, knowledge is power. When you lack it, people can take advantage of you.
This is why sophisticated women take their time to learn everything and anything there is to know about the world. They read books, they keep themselves updated on political news, and they take an interest in art and culture.
As a result, they know what they want – and they go after it.
Mind you, this doesn’t mean that classy women are all aspiring CEOs or millionaires. Your greatest dream in life can be a harmonious family, a blooming garden, or the uncertain and wild life of a creative, and you can still be incredibly classy.
Sophistication isn’t at odds with certain lifestyles. It’s at odds with low self-esteem.
Because sophistication is ultimately born from the confidence to go after what you want and the self-love to know that you are worthy of it.
3) She accepts help with grace
Going after your goals doesn’t automatically mean that you have to be hyper-independent.
In fact, there are plenty of sophisticated women out there who accept help all the time – not because they need it but because it makes their lives easier.
The difference between the two is of the utmost importance.
Sure, you can take all the bags up the stairs yourself. But why would you do that when someone’s offering to give you a helping hand?
Accepting help doesn’t equal weakness. It equals class and grace. Remember – you don’t need help, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t make your life a little bit easier if possible.
4) She works smart, not hard
Really, I mean it. When you work hard and never catch a break, you can work yourself into exhaustion.
Working smart, on the other hand… That’s a different story. Working smart is all about making one’s life more enjoyable while getting similar results as hard workers.
There’s a high chance that when I say the word “sophistication”, some of the associations that’ll pop into your mind will be “relaxation”, “luxury”, and “wellness”.
You’re probably imagining a well-dressed woman who goes on cruises, spa weekends, and trips to Paris.
This is because sophistication is inherently about the slow enjoyment of what life has to offer. More than that, it’s about knowing that you are worthy of this kind of life, which in turn helps you carry yourself with confidence.
5) She doesn’t talk about her private life in public
Psst. This is a big one, so listen up.
Sophistication revolves around privacy, which helps create a little bit of mystery.
As someone who used to talk about my private life with my friends with no regard for the strangers around us, it took me quite some time to master the skill of keeping my mouth shut.
Your private life belongs in the private sphere. Women who radiate class don’t discuss personal matters in public, and if they do, they keep their voices down.
What’s more, they aren’t crude or blunt. Their language, as well as their composure, exudes sophistication and a tiny bit of mystery.
6) She establishes clear boundaries
If there’s one trait that all classy women share, it’s that they refuse to be anyone’s doormats.
If you’re looking for an easy target to manipulate, you won’t find it here. A sophisticated woman has very clear standards and expectations, especially when it comes to romantic relationships, and she won’t settle for less than she deserves.
Not only that but her boundaries are set in stone. If you intentionally try to push them, you will usually only get one warning before she moves on to be with someone who respects her.
Classy women aren’t easy. They know they are worthy of high-quality love and devotion.
7) She makes carefully weighted decisions
If she gets into a relationship with someone, it’s not a flight of fancy.
On the contrary, she makes a careful decision based on real-life evidence that proves to her this romantic relationship could be right for her.
The same applies to all other areas of life. Classy women aren’t insanely spontaneous because they assign a lot of value to their decisions, which means that they’ve got to think it all over before they jump in.
They’re not going in blindfolded. They’ll always try to know as much as possible about the situation before they commit to it, be it romance, investing, or career options.
8) She is immune to external pressure
You might have already figured out that a woman who radiates sophistication isn’t easily influenced, but it bears mentioning because it makes up a big part of her charm.
If you get angry and try to drag her into a fight, she will not let you. Instead, she’ll keep her calm composure, her mental walls in place as she stares you down and offers rational arguments.
If you get a whole group of people to back you up during a disagreement, she won’t succumb to peer pressure unless you give her clear and logical reasons as to why she should change her mind.
In other words, a classy woman stands her ground. You can’t shake her – not unless you have good arguments to persuade her of the validity of your opinions.
9) She displays an integrity of character
There’s another reason apart from immunity to external influences that explains why sophisticated women can’t be easily manipulated or shaken.
Their integrity is too strong.
They abide by certain moral principles and they hold themselves to high standards, which is one hell of a combination.
If you ask them to do something that’d clash with their values or that’d weigh heavily on their conscience, they will refuse to do it simply because it’s at complete odds with who they are.
Plus, they know themselves extremely well, which only contributes to their sense of integrity because they’re able to recognize which actions are a complete no-go and which will push them further on their self-development journey.
To sum it up, you can’t fool a classy woman. Not easily, at least. She is too strong a person.
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