How can you tell if a guy is ready to commit or not?
Is there any sure way?
The only way to know for sure is when he drops to one knee and takes out a ring, or tells you his desire to commit and backs it up with action.
But there are a number of behaviors and signs that show a man is getting ready to commit to you and not just on the fence.
Here’s what to look for.
1) He’s present and alert
When a guy is ready and willing to commit to you, he’s present and alert.
He listens to what you say and remains present with you. He enjoys spending time with you and puts his phone down.
His body language is attentive and open, and he makes strong eye contact with you, seeking out as much of your presence as he can.
He not only likes to spend time with you, he actively seeks you out, setting up dates and maximizing his time with you outside of work.
2) He communicates consistently
The man who wants to commit to you makes an honest effort to communicate.
He loves talking to you, joking around and being there for you.
He’s not speaking to you on the phone out of obligation or answering your texts because he feels like he has to do so.
He wants to talk to you, and he values those moments you share together having discussions and heart-to-heart conversations.
3) He does his best to get along with you
There are many moments throughout the day when people can choose to argue or get along.
These are the small interactions or situations where it’s easy to get a bit annoyed or to hold back and be patient and kind.
Optimally, we all choose kindness and cooperation instead of conflict in these little situations.
But it’s certainly true that a man who wants to commit to you is going to choose harmony over arguing whenever possible. He’s not interested in causing problems or turning a small thing into a big fight.
He wants to be pleasant and get along with you as much as possible, because he’s hoping for a future with you.
4) He stays connected to you physically and emotionally
It may seem like a simple point, but a man who wants to commit to you is going to do his best to connect with you in an intense and enduring way.
He won’t disappear after a few nights of amazing physical intimacy, or open up and spill his guts to you about his emotions only to withdraw for weeks.
He wants to keep that connection open.
He’s a generous lover in bed and a generous soul in conversations. He’s not around you to have some thrills and then hit the road, and his every action and attitude will make this crystal clear.
5) He’s emotionally transparent with you
Men aren’t always known for being emotionally transparent, but a guy who’s serious about you makes a real effort to open up.
He is willing to bare his heart and soul to you and be emotionally available.
He opens up about his childhood, about his core values and about the experiences which have shaped him. He wants to know all about you and what formed you, too.
He’s not hiding anything, and he’s even willing to confront his shadow and own up to his shortcomings without going into a defensive mode.
6) He values your advice and guidance
The man who wants to be your one and only, also deeply values your advice and help.
He wants to know what you think about his decisions in life and seeks your input on many areas of his life.
He still lives his own life and makes his own choices, but he truly cares what you think and what you feel.
If you’re unhappy or unsure about anything he’s doing he talks it out with you instead of sweeping it under the rug.
7) He makes it official on social media
Social media is just pixels, but it means a lot. That’s especially true nowadays with how much time we spend around our phones and checking updates from friends and strangers.
The man who’s ready to commit to you will make it official on social media and he’ll be open to your desires to do so.
Whether he suggests this first or you do (or it’s a mutual decision), the fact of sharing that you’re in a serious relationship won’t make him uncomfortable.
In fact, you’ll be able to tell it makes him proud and that he’s excited to stake his claim and make it clear to everyone far and wide that you’re the one for him.
8) He’s proud of being together with you
The previous point emphasizes that a man who’s ready to commit to you will be proud of being with you.
He will tell you how special you are to him and help you out in a thousand small ways.
He will make it clear that he’s not interested in any other person and not viewing anyone else as even a remote chance of somebody he’d be into.
He’ll be fully interested in you and proud of being with you, like a man who’s won the lottery and is in awe of it.
9) He introduces you to family and friends
When a man is ready to commit he introduces you to his friends and family.
He wants those close to him to see what a special and unique person you are in his life and to know that his partnership with you isn’t a passing phase.
He’s with you long-term and you’re his partner, and he wants those he loves to get to know you.
He also wants you to have the chance to get to know them and be close with the people he loves.
10) He’s comfy being couple-ish with you in public
Not every man is comfortable with PDAs (Public Displays of Affection).
But every guy who’s ready to commit is comfortable and proud about being seen as a couple in public.
He won’t be awkwardly letting your hand go when you try to hold his hand, or mumbling his words when he introduces you.
He’s going to be crystal clear that you’re his partner and it’s something he’s very proud of.
11) He lets you know how much he cares without being controlling
When a man is ready to commit to you he lets you know in a respectful and serious way.
But he’s not controlling or putting conditions on it: in other words he’s ready to commit but he’s not demanding that you do.
He’s in love with you and letting you know about it in a caring and kind way, and he’s ready to move to the next step in your relationship, whatever that might be.
Which brings me to the final behavior of a man who’s ready to commit for real:
12) He wants to make plans with you for the future
The future is more than just some vague potentiality for this guy. He’s excited about the future and actually wants to plan it with you.
Talk about marriage, kids or moving in together is very much on the table. He’s open to discussing these things and getting serious. He may even be the one to first bring these subjects up with you.
The future is something he’s looking forward to and excited about, as well as something he’s ready to commit to.