Lucas Graham
It’s a sad truth that not every man who says they’re in love with you really is. They might think they are, but they actually aren’t.
How do I know? I fell deeply in love myself one fateful day in a bar on a first date with my (now) wife.
Admittedly, the things I do with her now are completely unlike anything I ever did before…
These 5 behaviors are just some of the things I do with her that I never did before!
Let’s get into it…
1) He compliments you genuinely
Think of all the compliments you’ve ever received from your man. I’m sure you can probably think of a few, “You look nice” or “You smell nice” compliments.
And sure, these compliments are nice to hear. But they’re not that deep or meaningful.
I know because I’ve given these out many times myself! And trust me, I really haven’t put that much thought into them…
It’s just something I’ve thought and said. Or (in complete honesty) it’s something I’ve said because I think it’s what the other person wants to hear…
But when a guy is deeply in love with you, he won’t just give you compliments like the above (i.e., surface-level compliments). His words of affection for you will be so much more thoughtful.
He might say things like how much he loves the way you treat his Grandma. Or how dedicated you are to your job. Or how gorgeous you look when you first wake up. Or how much he loves it when you play with your cat…
2) He truly relaxes around you
Think of someone you don’t like or someone you went on a date with once.
Let me guess, if you had to be around this person again, you wouldn’t feel that comfortable, right? You’d probably hide parts of yourself or, at the very least, be on edge around them, right?
Well, this is how most guys feel when they’re not truly in love: uncomfortable. On the flip side, this means that if a guy is madly in love with you, he’ll bare all!
He’ll completely relax around you when he’s watching TV, pulling every face he wants. He’ll fall asleep on your shoulder or your lap without caring how vulnerable it makes him feel. He’ll chat to you for hours about Star Wars without feeling embarrassed or like you’re uninterested.
Basically, when a guy is deeply in love with you, he’ll completely relax around you. He’ll be 100% himself and he won’t feel like he needs to hide any part of him – not his goofy side, his nerdy side, or his vulnerable side…
3) He cries in front of you
If you’ve dated men before, you probably haven’t seen many of them cry. And no, it isn’t because “men don’t cry”. They do – I have and many of my friends have, too!
It’s actually because most men don’t feel comfortable enough to cry around anyone. That is, until they fall deeply, head-over-heels in love with someone!
I never realized this until it happened to me, but when you deeply fall in love, it’s like you feel OK being vulnerable in any way – including crying.
The first time it happened to me was when my wife bought me a pack of Star Wars cards (my favorite) and wrote 52 things she loved about me. The second time was when I was telling her about my childhood dog. The third time was when I was proposing and telling her how much I loved her.
From then on, it happened more and more. And trust me, it was something I’d never done before in past relationships! But it happened when I really fell in love.
Sure, if your man doesn’t cry around you, that doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t love you. But in my experience, he might not be as comfortable as you think…
4) He appreciates (and sees) the little things you do for him
Don’t hate me for this, but when I dated people in the past, I didn’t really pay that much attention to them.
I noticed some things they did, but I didn’t notice everything. And in honesty, even when I did notice little things they did for me, I didn’t feel the need to say anything.
I can see now that my behavior was a major red flag that I wasn’t really in love!
Because when you fall deeply in love, you pay attention to everything your partner does – and I really mean everything!
You see all the little things they do for you, and it makes you fall even harder. You kind of obsess over them, if I’m being honest.
You think about them all the time and you run over the little things they do for you in your head, even when you’ve been together for years…
So if your man picks up on your little habits, thanks you all the time, and just generally appreciates what you do and who you are as a person, he’s probably madly in love with you – and he can’t help himself but pay attention to you!
5) He opens up to you about his past, mistakes, and failures
I know this doesn’t apply to all men, but most I know (including myself) have a lot of pride. We don’t like talking about our mistakes or failures – past or present.
When I dated people in the past, even people I lived with and thought I genuinely loved, I still hid parts of myself from them. I still felt like I needed to hide, like I wouldn’t really be loved for who I was.
After I met my now-wife, I realized that I felt this way because it’s how I felt about my girlfriend. I didn’t like hearing these things about them because it changed my opinion of them. So I didn’t want to share mine…
It was bad, I know. But that’s why it’s important to take note of this behavior in your man. Because if he tells you things like this truthfully, even when you don’t ask for them, he really trusts you. And his love is way deeper than you think it is!
Final thoughts
I’ll admit, I never used to do these things with some people I dated in the past! But with my wife, everything changed.
That’s how I know that a man who’s deeply in love with you won’t do things like the above – and they probably won’t even realize they aren’t doing it.
In my mind, if your man deeply loves you, you’ll know about it. So if you’re unsure already and he doesn’t do these things, then it might be bad news…
Every relationship is different, I know. But still, it’s food for thought!
