The truly confident man is a force.
Now when I say confidence, I don’t mean arrogance or conceit.
I mean real deeply-rooted self-assuredness–something that is quite rare in the greater scheme of things.
Any Tom, Dick, and Harry can stick out their chest and fake confidence.
Real confidence is harder to replicate; it manifests in every facet of a man’s life, from how they handle other people to the volume they speak.
In this article, I’ll walk you through some of the key behaviors a man exhibits when he’s brimming with confidence.
If you want to become more sure of yourself, developing these habits is an ideal place to start.
Let’s dive in!
1) He maintains firm eye contact
Generally speaking, a man with low self-esteem tends to avoid eye contact.
The intimate nature of eye contact makes them feel exposed, vulnerable, and uncomfortable.
And unfortunately, by averting gazes, they can often come across as shady, disrespectful, or untrustworthy.
But, typically, there isn’t anything particularly malicious behind a man’s dislike of eye contact–it simply can mean he has some self-doubt issues.
This behavior is a stark contrast to the confident guy.
The confident man is capable of maintaining steady eye contact throughout entire interactions.
He knows he has nothing to fear or hide; he knows that other people aren’t out to judge or scrutinize him–and if they are, that’s not his issue.
He makes just the right amount of eye contact to convey respect, without becoming intimidating; possessing enough emotional intelligence to make the latter distinction.
2) He speaks clearly and eloquently
A confident man is almost always a skillful communicator.
He can articulate his thoughts and ideas thoroughly.
He isn’t meek, stumbling over words, stuttering, or speaking at a barely audible volume; nor is he obnoxiously loud or aggressive.
Instead, when he speaks, he captivates, enunciating his words with incredible fluency; his stories tend to be filled with vivid detail.
Now the act of speaking may sound a bit superficial and mundane to you–but I assure you, how we communicate holds a ton of weight, it paints a picture of who we are internally.
So if you want to develop confidence, start being mindful of your speech. It will go a long way.
3) He stands tall
While an unconfident man might be perpetually hunched over, subconsciously wanting to appear smaller to the world, the confident man consistently stands tall.
He has dignity and is proud of who he is; hence, his body language and posture will always reflect that mentality.
When he moves, he moves upright, carrying himself with confidence and oozing aura and presence.
There’s a certain gravitas to the confident man–something you can feel almost immediately when they walk into a room.
4) He’s an active listener
Genuine confidence is internal.
The insecure person will talk incessantly about themselves, dominating the conversation.
They brag about accomplishments or name-drop, thinking it makes them look good, despite these habits almost always backfiring.
And once the spotlight shifts away from them, they turn to their phone almost instantly.
The confident man, however, will always show humility in their interactions. They have nothing to prove and it shows.
They’ll listen attentively, absorb what’s being said, and show genuine interest in others and their perspectives.
Through highly thoughtful responses and inquisitive questions, sprinkled with some well-meaning humor, it’s often a delight to converse with the confident man.
5) He accepts responsibility
Rather than constantly deflect blame and avoid accountability, a confident man will always own up to his shortcomings.
For a lot of guys, the problem with taking responsibility is that it often requires having to swallow their pride–something they are unwilling to do.
Their constitutions are so fragile, that being wrong can diminish their self-worth, so they almost instinctively become guarded.
Their confident counterparts are far more attuned to their actions, recognizing and admitting their mistakes without feeling like less of a person.
They know that being wrong is a completely routine part of the human experience.
This is why in sports or politics the best, most competent leaders are almost always willing to take the blame instead of make excuses–even when they’re not completely at fault.
Remember, sometimes it takes a real man to apologize.
6) He takes calculated risks
The confident man loves a good challenge.
He knows that the world is a vast and expansive place, and every day there’s something new to learn.
Hence, he has the courage to be daring.
He’ll willingly and assertively step out of his comfort zone to pursue his aspirations, taking calculated risks in the process.
Have you ever looked at a man who seemed to have it all, and felt a tinge of envy?
Well, chances are, he didn’t get there by playing it safe.
The truth is that nothing is ever certain, and achieving anything of value in this life will involve some risk.
7) He receives feedback gracefully
As established, weaker men often go on the defensive when faced with criticism.
Confident men have a different perspective when it comes to feedback and constructive criticism: they use it as an opportunity for growth.
In my twenties, I was fortunate enough to fulfill my dream of opening a restaurant.
As a fledging, rookie restaurant owner, I was filled with idealism, naivete, and a bit of arrogance, regularly taking in all the good feedback, and filtering out the more negative stuff.
On occasions, rather than acknowledge my mistakes and make amends with a customer complaint, I’d get openly defensive, engaging the wronged client in some, well, contentious wordplay.
A decade later, I can’t help but cringe at my former self, at how brash yet insecure I was.
These days, I take a far more humble approach to criticism (and customer service) using it as a platform for enrichment rather than resentment.
8) He remains calm under pressure
While most men (and people in general) might fold or panic under pressure, this is where the confident man rises above the herd and shines bright.
The confident man has an almost built-in ability to remain calm and collected when faced with adversity; their mental toughness inspires trust in their peers.
Do you think Michael Jordan became the GOAT of basketball by being passive in the most intense moments?
No, in crunch time, he would almost always deliver, relishing the challenge and pressure.
The higher the stakes, the greater the stress and repercussions should things go wrong.
Most people retreat or conveniently disappear in these circumstances, passing on the responsibility to a willing party–and typically, that means someone brimming with confidence.
Remember, confidence isn’t just for other people.
It’s a trait well within your grasp if you want it badly enough.
Rome wasn’t built in a day, so don’t expect to turn into mid-nineties Michael Jordan overnight.
Take baby steps.
As long as you are mindful of growth, and regularly wake up just a bit more confident than you were yesterday, then I’d say you’re in a good position.
Don’t let up.