Paul Brian
Will your partner stick with you when the times get tough or are they just in it for the good times?
In today’s world of rapid-fire dating and swiping all over the place it can be hard to tell sometimes.
Many people are good at putting on a show, but it’s also true that real love seems harder than ever to find.
Here’s the thing:
A man who actually loves you and will stand by your side is going to show it through his actions.
And if you pay attention to the following signs you’ll be able to tell clearly whether or not he’s a keeper or just another heartbreaker.
1) He remembers you all the time
When your partner is truly in love with you, he’ll think of you often.
If they’re always talking about things and he remembers lots of details about you and your time together, it’s a definite arrow in the right direction.
Whether it’s thoughtful texts or bringing up fond memories, the mention of things he remembers about you or pleasant thoughts he has about you are all sending one message:
He’s in love with you and he’s not going to run away when times get hard.
2) He brings you thoughtful gifts
Thoughtful gifts are a strong sign of real love.
This is especially true when you don’t hint at wanting any gift and when your partner knows fully that he doesn’t have to get you anything!
But he does anyway.
When your partner brings you presents at the most spontaneous times it shows two things:
- It shows he is thinking of you even when there is no specific date or occasion for it.
- It shows he is putting thought into a special gift that you’ll like which is uniquely geared at your interests and personality.
This is very special and is a world of difference away from random presents that people buy because they’re supposed to or in order to fulfill expectations on a special day or anniversary.
3) He takes care of small tasks that you hate doing
If your partner truly loves you and plans to stand by you, then he’s willing to go out of his way for you.
This includes in the sense of taking care of small things that you can’t stand doing.
That might be unloading dishes from the dishwasher or figuring out the best data package to buy for your smartphone.
If you don’t like doing it and wish somebody else would, he quickly picks up on that and offers to help.
Whether you live together or not, he is clearly trying to take a load off your shoulders because he wants you to know you’re not alone.
4) He expresses an interest in your interests
Relationships are all about building bridges, and a partner who truly loves you often shows it by being interested in your interests.
Even if he doesn’t share your interests or have much knowledge, he asks you more about what you’re into and enjoys finding out more.
This isn’t just flattery or him trying to be nice to you.
It’s because a partner who genuinely loves you is also fascinated by everything that’s you.
This includes your interests, and especially watching how your face lights up and becomes animated when you talk about what you’re into and open a door into that world.
5) He talks to friends and family about you a lot
When your partner is really in love with you he talks to everyone he knows about you.
He’s proud to be out with you in public and introduce you to his friends and those close to him.
He remembers key details about you and becomes enthusiastic when others ask how you met or anything about you as a couple.
Instead of a bored response or a quick summary, he enjoys retelling how fate brought you together and talking about the life the two of you are building.
6) He misses other events and meetings to be with you when needed
When your partner is truly in love with you, he will put you first even when it’s not always convenient for him.
If anything urgent comes up, he will rush to help you and be with you, or if he’s further away on business he will get back ASAP.
He doesn’t have a hesitation or the whole “well, I’d really love to come right now, but…”
He’s just there.
Even if you legitimately tell him he doesn’t need to come or that you can put off something you want to do or that a crisis isn’t that bad?
He doesn’t listen. He is too genuinely worried about you and coming to be by your side regardless.
7) He supports your dreams and is your biggest cheerleader
When somebody is really in love with you, he stands behind your dreams and is your biggest cheerleader.
If he has concerns about the feasibility of your plans or feels you’re making a mistake, he will be honest with you:
But he will always support the spirit of what you want to do and help you determine the best way forward.
When you’re looking for energy and motivation, your partner is there supporting you and encouraging your further progress.
He is helping you not get down when you face inevitable hurdles and being enthusiastic about your progress in life.
He’s not going to ditch you halfway along the path. He’s by your side and intends to continue being there.
This brings me to the next crucial point about the kind of guy who sticks around…
8) He’s there for you when the chips are down
This relates to the point about rushing to help you in a crisis and supporting your dreams and your ideals.
The partner who truly loves you is not just a fairweather man.
He loves you even when the chips are down:
When you’re diagnosed with a mental or physical illness. When you get bad news about your job and run into a financial mess. When you gain a bit of weight and are insecure about it.
This can’t be emphasized strongly enough:
He is there for you in a way that isn’t transactional but is clearly love-based.
In other words, he doesn’t have to push himself to be there for you, because it’s what he truly wants to do.
Because he loves you and his commitment to you isn’t only for the good times, it’s for all the times.
9) He opens up to you about his deepest thoughts and feelings
When your partner is really in love, doesn’t hide away how he really feels and thinks.
Some are more shy than others, for sure, but sooner or later a man who’s in love is going to reveal himself.
That’s because despite his fear of being rejected or being found unattractive in some way (which almost everybody has a bit when they’re in love) he also knows the following:
Your relationship can only be real and grounded on a firm foundation if you both open up and know each other, flaws and all.
For this reason, he knows that they have to take the risk in really opening up to you about who he is if they want you to also feel safe to do the same.
This is the necessary ingredient to take the relationship away from merely surface level and make it deep and abiding.
10) He can’t stop looking at you and making eye contact
This is one of the clearest signs of all that your partner loves you:
He keeps looking at you and making eye contact.
Could he just be very physically turned on? It’s possible, but in that case he’s more likely to be eyeing your charms and body, not gazing into your soul.
When your partner makes a lot of deep eye contact and wants to look at you all the time there are only a certain number of conclusions you can reach:
He certainly likes you very much, and chances are he’s far beyond like into the realm of being in love and wanting to stand by your side forever.
These feelings don’t just come and go, and far surpass sporadic attraction.
