Pearl Nash
Long-distance relationships can be successful.
Yes, really.
The majority of couples today have to face moments where they’re in different parts of the world, it’s very normal now.
Of course, we always hope you can be reunited with the person you love very soon.
In this article, we’ll give you some tips and tricks to work on strengthening your relationship, especially on the emotional side.
So you can navigate the geographical distance and get married.
8 ways to turn a long-distance relationship into a great marriage
Many couples face the challenge that comes with being long-distance.
This rings true especially when the relationship isn’t explicitly going somewhere, like marriage or a long-term partnership.
So, we’ve compiled a list of the things you will have to check for if you want your long-distance relationship to turn into a marriage one day.
1) Speak about the level of commitment you have to each other
Difficult conversations are a must when you really care about someone.
So, talk extensively about your wants and your needs, what are your expectations toward the relationship, and what will happen when you are away from each other.
Some people find themselves surprised to see the difference in expectations from their partner when it’s already too late to have a conversation about it.
This is how you turn a relationship into marriage: don’t assume.
You can open the conversation with one of these questions:
- Are we exclusive when we’re apart, or does that only pertain to the times we’re together?
- What happens if you’re attracted to someone else?
- What will you do when you feel lonely?
- What about one-on-one time with coworkers? Especially those of the opposite sex if your partner is heterosexual.
2) Plan ways to be there for each other, even if you’re not in the same place
There’s a lot of research on successful couples and long-lasting relationships.
One of the main conclusions is this: people that have been together a long time know how to answer the emotional calls of their partner.
These emotional calls are, basically, every time one partner tries to have a connection, a “moment”, with the other.
There’s a simple question at the core of these emotional calls:
“Are you there for me still?”
For long-distance partnerships, finding ways to connect emotionally might be a bit more challenging, so it will take more work.
If you’ve scheduled a video call with your significant other, make it a priority on your list of things to do. Share details of your daily life.
If your loved one is facing something important in their lives, like an exam or a promotion, call and ask about it.
When you incorporate your partner into your routine, they’ll know that you’ll be there for them, even if you’re apart.
3) Get into sexy videos
We see you, you knew this was coming.
Listen.
Video sex will happen at some point. It can feel awkward, especially if you’ve never done it before, but it will be on the table eventually.
So, take it as a challenge. Nobody was born great at sex and nobody knows how to act in front of a camera, especially when doing something sexy. Don’t take yourself too seriously and do your research.
It’s fine to laugh at yourself, sex is supposed to be fun and a little bit awkward.
Your main goal should be to capture that sexy spark you both have when you’re together.
Of course, it doesn’t replace in-person encounters, but it can sure be hot when you make it a regular thing in your daily life. Even when you’re apart, sex is another way to connect.
Remember: answering your partner’s emotional calls is the way to turn a relationship into a marriage.
4) Practice praise and encouragement
Negative emotions, such as jealousy and insecurities, can be highlighted in long-distance relationships.
It’s normal, given that you spend a lot of time away from each other. Make it a point in your day to reassure one another. It helps a lot to stop those feelings.
If you haven’t been doing it, next time you’re talking with your significant other, say something nice about them or the relationship. You’ll see the difference.
Additionally, don’t be afraid to ask your partner about their feelings for you. Encouragement goes both ways.
5) Make time for each other
Thankfully, modern technology makes this a lot easier. You shouldn’t be going days and days with no contact from your partner nowadays.
Text or message throughout the day, and try to stay in contact as much as you both need. A real connection thrives in sharing the routine, the small details.
If you’re the one who’s away in another country, it helps to feel less alone.
Of course, this doesn’t mean you should spend hours and hours talking away, but sharing small conversations is often great for you both.
Call your partner before you go to meet with friends, or while you’re grocery shopping.
Skype or FaceTime are also great choices to see each other, even if you don’t talk a lot. It’s great to know that your partner is still committed to you.
6) Know that you’re apart for a good reason
Being in a long-distance relationship will not always be easy. You might feel the temptation to quit a dream job, or even university, just so you can be with your significant other in person.
Yeah, we know, it sounds super romantic… but remember why you’re away from each other now. What are your and their goals?
They can be personal, like a family situation, professional, or even financial. Timing is a challenge in every relationship, but you can get through this and be together again when it’s right.
You won’t spend apart forever, don’t be impatient with yourself or your partner. One day, you will share your entire day with them again.
7) Find positive sides in being apart from each other
Bear with us here.
We know it doesn’t sound too positive to be away from the person you love. Even so, what matters here is how you look at this separation, circumstances aside.
What are the positives of being apart from your significant others?
Try to think of a few things.
Maybe you finally have time for that hobby you could never start, or maybe you can see your family a bit more.
Write down a list of these good things and focus on them when you miss your partner too much.
8) Be realistic with each other
Long-distance shouldn’t be a “forever” thing. It can last long, but it can’t be forever. Sometimes, life just happens.
Your relationship might turn into a long-distance one simply because one of you has to take care of family, or maybe a good job opportunity has come up. There are thousands of reasons why something can happen.
It’s ok, you got this, but there has to be a limit.
Maybe all you can go for is six months. Maybe it’s a year, maybe even two years. Decide this together, talk about it and work through the decision and the pain that it can bring.
Marriage is about commitment, so it has to be one of the top priorities in your life.
How long-distance relationship can be beneficial for you?
Even though long-distance relationships aren’t the easiest to navigate, they can still be helpful for you as a couple.
Here’s the list of positive things that your time apart can do for you:
- You learn how to be there for each other. Once you’re apart you have to make an effort to keep the contact with each other. If you learn to do it while being apart, it’ll be easier for you to stay close once you reunite;
- You’ll learn how to prove your love to each other. One Chinese proverb goes as: “Real gold is not afraid of the test of fire.” It means that if your connection is real, you’ll only strengthen it while being apart and showing each other how much you want to stay together.
- You’ll discover a more intimate side of your relationship. Unfortunately, there are many couples that live together but lack emotional connection. Being in touch all the time and having long talks will help you to build this connection and then transfer it to your further relationship.
- You’ll be more clear with your expectations. Being in a long-term relationship requires a lot of commitment. To keep it going, you both need to know why you put so much effort into it. Once you talk about your mutual plans for the future, you’ll know what to expect from this relationship and where it is going eventually.
Even though there are some downsides to long-distance relationships, there are also positive sides to them.
The key is how you look at them.
Wrapping up
By now you should have a better idea of how to convert your long-distance relationship into marriage.
So the key now is getting through to your man in a way that empowers both him and you.
How? By triggering his hero instinct.
I learned about this from relationship expert James Bauer and it’s about what really drives men in relationships, which is ingrained in their DNA.
To be more precise, men need to feel needed by the woman they love. And in order to make that happen, it’s only a matter of knowing the right things to say to make him realize that he wants you and only you.
And since this free video reveals exactly how to trigger your man’s hero instinct, you could make this change as early as today.
With James Bauer’s incredible concept, he’ll see you as the only woman for him. So if you’re ready to take that plunge, be sure to check out the video now.
