So you’re trying to figure out if a guy likes you through text.
Don’t worry, we’ve all been there.
While you might think it’s easy, it’s actually harder than you might think.
Because you can’t rely on body language or social interactions.
It’s just his texts, his replies and how long it takes him to respond.
But fear not, there are certain tricks of the trade that will enable you to get a better idea if he likes you or not.
You just need to know what questions to ask, what to look for, and what you can do.
So in this article, I’m going through all of the different signs that he likes you through text.
We have a lot to cover so let’s get started.
1. He talks about what you’d be doing if he was there
Let’s be honest: This is a pretty obvious sign that he likes you.
If he is saying things like, “If I was with you right now, we’d be doing this
or “I wish I was there with you right now, we’d be having so much fun!” then there’s a big chance he likes you.
Because it’s clear that he is thinking about being with you.
Not only that, but he WANTS to be with you.
We can all agree that feeling the desire to spend time with someone else is a clear sign that you like them.
2. He is using A LOT of flirty Emojis
Now, this is a generalizing a little.
Clearly some people are just liberal with emojis no matter what.
But if you’ve seen him text other people, or you’ve witnessed how he communicates on platforms such as Instagram and Facebook, and he appears to be using a lot of flirty emojis specifically with you, then that’s a fair sign that he’s into you.
So, what kind of flirty emojis will he use if he likes you?
The common ones: the emoji with the heart eyes, smiley face with the tongue sticking out or the playful lips that signify a kiss.
If it seems like he doesn’t use them regularly, and he is clearly making an exception for you, then that’s a great sign.
Watch out for the slippery and slidey players who flirt with every single girl they can talk to
One way to find out if your guy does this is to get one of your friends to chat with him as well.
Then you can analyze how many flirty emojis he uses with them.
3. Is he showing interest (and concern) for you?
A surefire way to tell whether a guy likes you over text is that he shows genuine interest and concern for you.
Although it may only be early days, a guy should still ask you how you are (and mean it) and show concern for your happiness and general wellbeing.
Feeling protective over a woman is a great sign that a guy likes you. Because he wants to be there for you and to be the person you turn to when you need help.
Don’t get me wrong, no doubt your guy loves your strength and abilities to be independent. But he still wants to feel wanted and useful — not dispensable!
This is because men have a built in desire for something “greater” that goes beyond love or sex. It’s why men who seemingly have the “perfect girlfriend” are still unhappy and find themselves constantly searching for something else. Or worst of all, someone else.
Simply put, men have a biological drive to feel needed, to feel important, and to provide for the woman he cares about. Even when you guys are texting, this drive will be apparent.
Relationship psychologist James Bauer calls it the hero instinct. He’s created an excellent free video explaining his concept.
As James argues, male desires are not complicated, just misunderstood. Instincts are powerful drivers of human behavior and this is especially true for how men approach their relationships.
So, when the hero instinct isn’t triggered, men are unlikely to enter into a relationship. He holds back because being in a relationship is a serious investment for him. And he won’t fully “invest” in you unless you give him a sense of meaning and purpose and make him feel essential.
How do you trigger this instinct in him? How do you give him a sense of meaning and purpose?
You don’t need to pretend to be anyone you’re not or play the “damsel in distress”. You don’t have to dilute your strength or independence in any way, shape or form.
In an authentic way, you simply have to show your man what you need and allow him to step up to fulfill it.
In his new video, James Bauer outlines several things you can do. He reveals the texts you can send him right now to make him feel more essential to you.
By triggering this very natural male instinct, you’ll not only supercharge his confidence as a man but it will also help to rocket your relationship to the next level.
4. He takes time with his texts
Many people don’t get this, but stay away from the guys who offer you one-word answers!
Trust me, it’s just not worth it.
But when a guy gives you thoughtful responses and that show they actually want to engage, then he probably likes you.
After all, when you’re on your phone, you’ve got unlimited opportunities of what you could do and whom you could talk to.
You could be watching Netflix, he could spending time chatting with any other girl, he could be catching up with the news.
But no, he’s decided to spend time crafting a response for you.
If that doesn’t indicate that he likes you, then I don’t know what does.
5. He initiates conversation
Is your man the first to text you?
Then give me a hand five because that’s a great sign.
When you’re the one who has to always start the conversation that’s usually a bad sign that you like him more than he likes you.
See wait a bit and practice a little patience. If he texts you first, you can bet your bottom dollar he’s into you.
6. He responds back quickly
Don’t ya just hate the guys who take AGES to respond?
Well, that’s a good thing, because they probably don’t like you.
Unless they’re super desperate and they’re trying to act cool by not texting you for days.
That’s more common than you might think.
But for now, assume that if he texts you back right away he definitely likes you.
He’s engaged in the conversation and he wants to spend his free time on the phone on you.
7. If a guy is into you, he is going to start to texting you a little differently than normal
This kind of weirdness will usually come out in terms of weird jokes when he is texting.
Perhaps he’ll try a little hard with his texts and try to impress you by making you laugh.
It can also play out in terms of banter and jokes. If he is constantly telling jokes or playfully teasing you, then they’re probably interested in you.
Don’t let it weird you out – just keep playing it cool and he’ll come around.
Once he settles down and realizes that you are into him too, he’ll relax.
RELATED: 3 ways to make a man addicted to you
8. Is he complimenting you?
Compliments are a great way to gauge a guy’s interest. Of course, many guys can give compliments when they don’t really mean it if they want to get you in the sack.
But if they truly like you, they’ll probably start complimenting you on subtle things that you may not be aware of.
It could some rare photo on your Facebook and observations about your behavior.
It could be unique tidbits about your personality, or they could notice subtle changes in your hairstyle in your latest Instagram photo.
In fact, sometimes it may not even be a compliment, but the fact that they’ve noticed that you’ve changed your hairstyle or used different make-up.
If they notice, it means they’re paying attention to you, and they probably like you.
Also, not many guys are great at giving compliments, so keep your wits about you and notice when he says something that could even be remotely viewed as a compliment.
If you’ve noticed that he doesn’t really compliment others when he texts you, then he probably likes you.
9. He’s trying to work out if you have a boyfriend
Now it’s fairly obvious that if he asks you, ‘Do you have a boyfriend?” then he’s clearly interested.
But not many guys are going to be that direct. Instead, they’ll ask indirect questions to figure it out.
Perhaps they’ll mention that they’re single in the hope that it forces you to say “me too.”
Or they’ll ask things like, “Oh, so you went alone to the party?”
If you’re looking out for it, it will be pretty easy to notice.
You could mention that you are indeed single and watch for their reaction. If it produces a smile from the guy, then he’s definitely into you.
10. He remembers little things
Guys aren’t the best when it comes to remembering the little things.
So if he remembers that you had your brother’s birthday party the night before and he’s asking you how it went, then he probably likes you.
He’s thinking about you. He wants to stay connected and develop rapport.
Most people, let alone guys, wouldn’t do this, so see it as a sign that he has genuine feelings for you.
11. He wants to help you with your problems
Guys are problem solvers. And when it comes to a person they like, they want to find a solution to every problem they hear about.
Furthermore, they want to impress you with their solutions.
So if you mention a problem you have, and he likes you, he’ll likely scan his brain searching for solutions.
A guy that likes you will go the extra mile. They’ll want to be your hero that saves the day.
12. He’s teasing you
We’ve all heard this one before. A guy who likes you teases you. Sound familiar?
No matter what age they are, guys have a habit of teasing a female they’re interested in.
Remember in Kindergarten when a boy would pull a girl’s hair? Yep, he liked her.
Guys do this because they want attention and they want to be funny. Teasing is basically a way of telling you they like you.
Remember, some guys will do this a little awkwardly, and they might not be very good at it. They might even insult you.
But there’s no need to get insulted. After all, they’re just trying to let you know that they like you!
13. He laughs at everything you say
There’s no denying it.
He likes you when he thinks you’re the funniest person on the planet…especially when you’re clearly not.
If he is saying “haha” or “lol” to everything you say then that’s clearly a good sign.
So if you’re wondering if he likes you, there’s an easy way to find out:
Tell a lame joke and see how he reacts. If he laughs, he likes you (or ultra polite). And if he doesn’t laugh, or at least make you feel good about your attempted joke, then he might not like you.
Just keep in mind that our sense of trying to make people feel important and acknowledged when he like them is so high that we will go out of our way to make ourselves look silly (aka laughing when we shouldn’t be) so that the other person is raised up.
Love is a tricky thing, isn’t it?
14. He is drunk dialing you
Well, you can’t get much more obvious than this, can you?
Have you heard the saying: “A drunk’s person’s words are a sober person’s thoughts?”
Alcohol has a way of making you honest with your emotions. So if they’re calling you or texting you when they’re drunk, it’s a great sign that they like you.
If it becomes common, then you might want to ask him out.
However, watch out for the men that drunk call you only at 2 am on a Saturday night. They might just be looking for a booty call.
The fact of the matter is, they’ve been out since at least 9 pm and they’ve only contacted you at 2 am. Stay away from those guys!
15. How to Tell For Sure if a Guy Likes You
Want to know the best way to tell if a guy likes you? Ask him through text. Or let him know you like him. This isn’t high school, and there’s no need for games.
Cut the chase and let him know you think he’s cool and he’ll either say the same or tell you he’s not interested.
If that’s not your style, and granted, it’s not a lot of people’s style, keep paying attention to how he acts texts, if he flirts with you, how he takes in what you have to say, and if he makes an effort by constantly chatting to you.
Summing it up
These 14 surprising signs are strong indicators if a guy likes you through text.
However, how good is YOUR texting game?
Because developing chemistry in text messages has never been more important. With all the corona craziness in 2020, you must be fun and keep his attention over text.
Yet there is one big mistake women make when texting a guy…
They don’t text him in a way that triggers certain powerful emotions. In other words, they don’t trigger his hero instinct.
I talked about this concept above. James Bauer, a relationship psychologist, coined the term.
The simple truth is that men have a thirst for your admiration. They want to step up for the woman in their lives and make sure she’s okay at all times. This is deeply rooted in male biology.
If a woman really likes a guy, she’ll bring this deeply rooted instinct to the fore—even over text. She’ll send the right messages and say the right things that trigger this instinct in him.
Does he feel that you genuinely want and need to have him around? Or does he feel like a mere accessory, ‘best friend’, or ‘partner in crime’?
If you want to learn more about the hero instinct, check out this free online video. James Bauer gives a terrific introduction to his concept.
Some ideas really are life-changing. And for romantic relationships, I think this is one of them.