I don’t need to tell you that’s incredibly difficult to figure out whether a girl likes you or not.
I’m a guy, and I’ve found it virtually impossible my whole life.
But the truth is, when you do some research and understand women psychology, the task becomes a lot easier. Women aren’t as complex as you might think.
So today, I’m going to explain every telltale sign I’ve found in my research that a girl likes you.
First off, we’ll start with 15 physical signs she likes you. After that, we’ll discuss 20 social/personality cues that she’s into you.
How to tell if a girl likes you: 15 physical signs
1. She stands taller, pulls her shoulders back and sucks her stomach in.
If she stands taller, pulls her stomach in and her shoulders back, then that’s a great sign that she’s into you.
After all, subconsciously she wants to impress you.
You can easily check out her posture when she walks past you or away from you. If she knows you’re looking, she’ll automatically change her posture like above.
Also, she might wiggle her hips like she is on the catwalk.
Other subconscious physical signs include licking her lips, pushing her neck out or touching her neck.
Because she wants to accentuate her body or face.
Other physical signs of interest can be running her hand through her hair or tilting her head.
In case you’re wondering, here’s an accentuated version of the posture they would use to walk when they know you’re looking (known as the catwalk):
2. Her feet are pointing towards you
This is because humans aren’t really conscious of what our feet are doing.
Watch out for:
– If her feet are pointing towards you, that’s a really good sign.
– If they are pointing completely away from you, or to the door, then she may not be interested.
– If she has her feet under her when she is sitting or her legs tightly crossed, she may be nervous or uncomfortable around you.
– Girls who sit with their feet away from their body may be relaxed when they’re around you. This is a great sign that she’s comfortable spending time with you.
3. Her body is turned towards you
In the same vein, body orientation is an important indicator that she likes you.
Turning her body towards you and giving you her full presence is a great sign.
Just like her feet, the body subconsciously turns towards the person they’re interested in.
It’s something that most people don’t consciously think about.
So keep an eye out for where her feet and her body are positioned in relation to you.
If she talks to you without moving her body towards yours, that might not be a good sign.
4. She reacts to your body language
How a woman reacts to your body language is an excellent indicator of whether she likes you or not.
Because women are highly tuned into the signals a man’s body is giving off. And if your body language is giving off the right signals, she’ll more likely than not respond with an emphatic ‘yes’ to you.
Let’s face it: Being good looking and in shape can be helpful when it comes to women.
However, much more important is the signals you convey to them. Because it doesn’t matter what you look like or how wealthy you are…
…if you’re short, fat, bald, or stupid.
Any man can learn some simple body language techniques that tap into the primal desires of their ideal girl.
Every day, more studies are coming out proving that women are attracted to the nonverbal communicators men give off… rather than the way they look. In other words, it’s the body language of the guy that makes all the difference.
That’s why you need to understand what you’re telling women with your body language and what they’re ‘saying’ back to you.
Kate Spring is widely considered to be one of the best dating coaches in the world. Her specialty is helping men understand female psychology. And her advice revolves around the (seemingly) small signals any man can give to attract any kind of woman.
5. She’s getting touchy-feely with you
It’s commonly known that people often touch the person they like.
According to behavior analyst Jack Schafer, “women may lightly touch the arm of the person they are talking to. This light touch is not an invitation to a sexual encounter; it merely indicates she likes you.”
Another indicator that she likes you is if just starts preening you. This means picking lint off your clothes or fixing a piece of your clothing that’s crooked.
Also, as we mentioned above, if you want to test out whether she likes you, you can always lightly touch her.
If she quickly pulls away, then she’s not comfortable. This doesn’t necessarily mean she doesn’t like you as it depends how naturally touchy-feely she is.
If she seems like a touchy-feely person with other people, then the fact she pulled away obviously isn’t a good sign.
But if she’s a nervous kind of person, then it may take her time to get comfortable with you touching her, even if she is interested in you.
6. She blushes when she’s around you
Blushing is when they develop a pink tinge in the face from embarrassment or shame.
It’s common to blush when you get an unexpected compliment, or you like someone.
So if you find that she blushes when she’s around you, then it’s a good sign that she likes you.
However, make sure she doesn’t easily blush around other people as well.
7. She allows you in her personal space
We all value our personal space.
You obviously wouldn’t let someone you don’t like in your personal space. This is why many women create boundaries to stop men from getting too close to them.
But if a girl is allowing you in her “physical space” then she probably likes you.
Dr. Martinez on Ask Men explains how allowing someone into your personal space is a clear indicator that a person likes you:
“While we each have different personal space boundaries, when someone is inside what most of us would consider our bubble, we may want to take notice that this person wants our attention and wants to be near us.”
This sign is easy for you to test out. All if you have to do is get close to her and see how she reacts. If she’s fine with it and doesn’t take a backward step, then she probably likes you.
8. Her pupils dilate
This one is harder to figure out, but dilated pupils are a sign of attraction.
Try to look into her eyes without creeping her out and see if you notice dilated pupils.
Keep in mind that if the lights suddenly dim, her pupils will naturally dilate.
9. She’s copying your gestures and movements
This is a huge sign that she likes you more than a friend. It’s something we all do subconsciously.
Watch out for:
– Is she copying your hand gestures when she speaks? Is she mirroring your energy level? If you talk slow, is she suddenly talking slower than usual? If she does any of these, then she might be interested.
– If she likes you, she’ll also copy some words you use, especially slang.
10. She looks at you
If she’s interested and forward, she’ll be looking at you and will maintain eye contact when you lock eyes.
She may smile or she may scan your face and give you a double-take. This is a pretty obvious sign that she likes you and she isn’t afraid to show it, either.
However, if she’s nervous and shy, she may look down when you lock eyes.
If she looks away when you notice her looking at you, that’s also a good sign. It could mean that she’s interested in you, but doesn’t want you to know she’s interested in you.
(In my new article, I explain why women don’t choose the guy who makes the most “sense” to be with – they look for these 3 ‘body language cues’ instead. Check it out here).
11. She’s preening herself
What is preening? This is basically the act of “fixing herself” in different ways.
It could be adjusting her clothes, running her fingers through her hair, or putting lip gloss on her lips.
After all, she wants to look better when she’s around you. It can also be put down to nerves. People are naturally fidgety when they’re anxious and nervous.
And let’s be honest, it’s kind of hot when a woman puts herself together, and women subconsciously know this.
And it’s just not small levels of attraction, either. They pull these moves when they’re highly attracted to a man and they want them to know about it.
Here’s a 20-second example of preening – though it’s slightly exaggerated – women will usually be a little more subtle unless they’re incredibly direct.
12. She leans in and tilts her head
If she’s leaning in when she talks to you, she’s trying to tell you she’s engaged. This is especially the case if you’re with a group of people. She’s obviously most engaged with what you’re saying.
It’s also a way to subconsciously pull you in her direction so that you can get a bit of a two-on-two time.
In the same vein, head tilting shows interest and engagement. She’s letting you know she’s present and in the conversation.
Make sure you respect this sign and engage yourself in the conversation. Don’t lean in. You don’t want to appear needy as you already have her attention.
But maintain solid eye contact and be interested in the conversation.
13. She’s using “open” body language
Is she comfortable around you?
You can tell by noticing if she’s loose with her body language. Is she spreading her arms and legs? This is a great sign that she’s comfortable.
However, it doesn’t specifically suggest attraction as she’ll also be comfortable around friends as well.
It’s really going to depend on context. If you haven’t known her for very long, and she’s using loose body language, then that’s an excellent sign that there’s a strong connection between the two of you.
Comfort is important for women when it comes to selecting a boyfriend.
Also, this will depend on her personality. If she’s the shy type, then it’s unlikely she’ll use loose body language even if she does like you.
But if she’s direct and confident, this type of body language is an excellent indicator that she likes you.
14. She’s visibly nervous or shy
If she likes you, and she doesn’t know you that well, then she’s more likely to get nervous and shy around you.
After all, she wants to make a good impression.
According to Business Insider, there are seven signs to look for to tell if someone is nervous:
1) They touch their face. This can include squeezing their face, pushing their cheek or rubbing their forehead.
2) They blink more frequently. Researchers have found that eye-blink rate increases when someone is nervous.
3) They compress their lips. This is an instinctual response to protect ourselves from danger.
4) They play with their hair. Hair twirling is a way to alleviate anxiety. It’s stress reducing.
5) They contort their hands. This can either be interlaced squeezed fingers, rotating hands back and forth awkwardly or cracking knuckles.
6) They rub their hands together.
7) They yawn excessively. This is a strange one, but research has found that yawning helps regulate our body temperature, bringing cool air into the nose and mouth. (Stress and anxiety cause the brain to get hotter).
So if she’s presenting these signs around you, then she could be nervous which is a great sign that she likes you (assuming you don’t know her very well yet).
As she gets to know you more, the nerves should go away, and you’ll be able to build a connection.
15. She caresses an object in her hands
This one is interesting, and sometimes it can be difficult to differentiate from normal holding.
So, here’s what to look out for:
The most important factor with this sign is how she holds an object. Is she caressing it gently? Stroking it while looking at you directly? If so, that’s a tremendous subconscious sign that she’s picking up what you’re putting down.
If she just holds an object tightly and gives you fleeting eye contact, then that’s not really a sign of anything.
But holding eye contact while caressing an object in her hands is an excellent indicator that she likes you.
If she likes you, she may also hold the object in your direction, just like how she would point her feet or body in your direction.
If she’s shielding the object from you, holding it tightly and moving her body away from you, then that’s not a good indicator that she likes you.
16. Remember, it’s in the small details
The most important consideration you need to understand when it comes to body language is that women are much more subtle than men when it comes to conveying interest.
In fact, researchers have found that women are usually the ones who make the first move; albeit in a subtle way.
For example, researchers in the 80s and 90s documented early courtship behavior in a series of creative observational studies in bars, dance clubs and other places where people meet.
What did they notice?
They found that women were the ones who signaled to men who interested them, helping the man to approach.
They found that women signaled their interest by:
– A long, steady scan around the room, ultimately fixing her gaze on a man she finds attractive.
– Once eye contact is reciprocated, she will smile and then break the gaze.
– She will preen herself (as we spoke about above).
– She will adopt an open body posture.
– She will orient her body to face him.
Now we’ve spoken about all of these signs, but I’m bringing it up again because it’s important to remember that they’re subtle signs. Women won’t be explicit about it.
So don’t get bummed when you think a girl doesn’t like you. It’s more likely that you’re not noticing the subtle signs.
How to tell if a girl likes you: 20 social and personality cues
1. Her personality changes when she’s around you
Subtle changes in personality will indicate that she likes you. However, they may also indicate that she doesn’t like you.
Before you make assumptions based on these clues, you’ll need to get a baseline with how she acts around her friends.
Once you have that, watch out for:
– Is she more bubbly and enthusiastic when she’s around you? This could be a sign that she is trying to impress you.
Some girls, however, will get more shy, awkward and quiet when they are around you. If she goes red in the face or she looks down, then she may be shy and nervous because she likes you.
– If she’s not interested, then she may turn her body away from you, and give you short, nothing answers.
She may act annoyed when you disrupt her or take her time away. Or she may direct her attention towards others she’s more romantically interested in.
– Is she treating you differently to others? This can include things like a playful tap on the arm, or a friendly arm around you. If she doesn’t do this to others, then it may indicate that she likes you.
2. If you do something out of the ordinary, she blushes or seems flustered
When you’re around her, do something that totally surprises her. This could be an unexpected compliment, or you could playfully touch her on the arm.
She doesn’t have time to prepare her response, so this will be an excellent indicator as to whether she likes you.
– If she blushes and seems flustered, then that’s an excellent sign that she wants to impress you. She may also run her hand through her hair or adjust her clothing.
– If she seems annoyed that you’ve distracted her or done something out of the ordinary, then she may not be interested.
How are her friends acting towards you? If when you come over to them, they make an effort to leave you two alone, then it’s pretty obvious that they know that she likes you.
They may also giggle, whisper or enthusiastically smile at you when you’re around.
– If she has spoken to her friends about you, they may also try to get know to you to make sure you’re a good guy and suitable for her.
4. She pays attention to you
– If she likes you, she’ll relish the time you two have together. She’ll give you undivided attention and will be enthusiastic about the exchange.
– If she’s shy, she’ll want to stay in the conversation and prolong the time you have together, but she may not seem that enthusiastic.
– If you’re in a group and she watches you more than she watches others, then that’s an excellent sign that she likes you.
– On the other hand, if she is looking at her phone when you’re talking one-on-one or she seems distracted, then she may not be that into you.
5. She gets flustered when you say hello as she is talking to another guy
The reaction she has when you say hello and she’s talking with another guy will tell you whether she likes you or not.
– If she is flustered, blushing or shy, then this could be a sign that she’s worried that you think she like this guy and not you.
She even might try to pull you in the conversation to show she likes you or she’ll take a step back from the guy she’s talking to show you it’s nothing romantic.
These are great signs that she cares about what you think and doesn’t want you to get the wrong impression.
– If she doesn’t really notice you, or just views your “hello” as a distraction, then she might not be into you and is more into the guy she’s talking to.
– If there are a group of people, check to see if she’s looking at you and monitoring your reactions.
This is a great sign that she cares about how you’re reacting to the people around her.
– Remember, don’t read too much into her behavior if she is talking to “guy friends”. It’s likely that she’s comfortable around them, which may cause you to wrongly think that she romantically likes them.
6. When she does or says something, she looks at you to see what your reaction is
This is a huge indicator that’s fairly easy to notice. This is particularly the case when you’re in a group of people.
If she’s looking at you after she’s said something, then it’s a great indicator she’s seeking your approval or trying to impress you.
Watch out for when she tells a joke to a group of people. She’ll look at your reaction first to see if you find it funny. That is of course if she likes you.
7. Different personalities will show they like you in different ways
It’s important to remember that people express interest in different ways.
– If she’s an alpha female and confident, then she’ll be pretty forward that she likes you.
She’s not going to come out and say it, but her physical postures will present you with clues.
As we mentioned before, she’ll likely pull her shoulders back, suck her stomach in and wiggle her hips when she walks. She’ll also give you strong eye contact.
If she’s the shy or anxious type, then it’s going to be a little more difficult.
Signs of blushing or looking down at the ground are generally good signs if they’re the shy type.
The anxious/avoidant types will generally appear aloof, so watch out for the subconscious physical signs.
– Also, keep in mind that most girls will wait for the guy to make the first move.
So, if you’re fairly confident that she likes you, then you might want to cut to the chase and ask her out. At least you’ll know for sure.
8. She’s asking personal questions
Many men don’t pick up on this sign.
Personal questions don’t mean the normal “getting to know you” questions. It’s questions that go beyond that.
She’s trying to get to know you for who you are. Perhaps the questions might have an emotional bent.
For example, instead of “what do you do,” it might be, “what motivates you to do what you do?”
Watch out for questions that you’re not really used to. She’ll take more time with her questions, and she’ll tailor them towards you.
They’ll be more considered and it’s an excellent sign of interest and attraction.
9. She’s chatting to you constantly on social media
Social media time is time where we can literally do whatever we like. There’s a world to explore on the Internet, and she’s choosing to explore you.
However, what’s more, important here is to keep an eye on how engaged she actually is. Is she giving you one-word responses? That’s not a good sign.
But if her responses are thoughtful, that’s a good sign.
How quickly is she responding? The quicker, the better.
But it’s also likely that she won’t to appear too desperate by replying immediately. If she really likes you, she might take 15 planned minutes to respond.
If she’s not responding for days, then it’s probably not a good sign.
Another strong indicator that she likes you is “liking” and interacting with your posts on social media. Facebook/Instagram/Twitter etc. are all run on algorithms. So if she’s clicked on your photos before and stalked your profile, your posts are going to appear at the top of her newsfeed.
If she hasn’t interacted with social media account before, then she might not even see your update.
10. She’s drunk dialing you
You’ve probably heard the saying:
“A drunk person’s words are a sober person’s thoughts.”
Alcohol has a way of making you more honest with your emotions. So if she’s messaging and calling you when she’s drunk, she probably wants to be with you.
She’s obviously got you on your mind and alcohol is forcing her to take action.
If this becomes a common occurrence, then you might want to bite the bullet and organize a drinking date with her. It will be a great way to express your feelings to each other.
11. She’s trying to let you know she’s single – and she wants to know if you have a girlfriend
This can slide past a lot of guy’s heads. I’m not necessarily talking about the question:
“Do you have a girlfriend?”
That’s an extremely obvious sign that she likes you. Most girls won’t be that direct.
Instead, she’ll be subtle about getting you to reveal yourself. Perhaps she’ll mention that she’s single in the hope that you react saying you’re single. Maybe she’ll mention that she went by herself to a wedding the other weekend.
Keep on the lookout for little things like this. If she’s trying to let you know she’s single and she wants to know your status, she probably likes you and wants to know that there could be a future between the two of you.
12. She laughs at your stupid jokes – and smiles a lot when you talk to her
You know they’re stupid jokes. Everyone around you knows they’re stupid jokes. She knows they’re stupid jokes.
Yet, here she is, laughing her heart out at your stupid jokes.
So if she’s laughing at your jokes that make other people cringe, she likes you.
Another good sign is that she’ll also smile a lot when you’re speaking. You make her feel good, and she wants to impress you with her glowing smile.
13. Conversations between you two seem effortless
This is a great sign that there’s chemistry and rapport between the two of you. And when there’s chemistry and rapport, the more likely it will be that she likes you.
Also, if she likes you, she’s probably making more of an effort in the conversation. She’s asking questions and being talkative because she wants to avoid any awkward silences.
If you like her, you’re probably doing the same which is making the conversation flow nicely.
14. She’ll start to reveal her quirky side
When a girl starts to become comfortable being around you, she’ll reveal more of who truly is.
Where she may have hidden her geeky or quirky traits in the beginning, she’s now become more open and comfortable with being herself.
As a result, she’ll naturally start to reveal her quirky or geeky side. She knows that you’ll accept her for who she is.
This by itself doesn’t mean she’s like you. After all, she can feel comfortable with a friend.
But if you’re not in the friend zone yet, then this is a good sign that she’s comfortable with you and likes you.
15. She’s telling you personal things about your life
In the same vein, when she becomes comfortable with you, she’ll reveal more about her personal life.
This is a great sign that she sees you as someone she can trust.
But in the same token, it doesn’t necessarily mean she likes you, though it a good sign.
If you’ve been friends with her for a while, then she’ll undoubtedly reveal more about herself because she feels comfortable with you, not because she likes you romantically.
But if you haven’t known her that long and she’s revealing personal things about her life that most people don’t talk about, then she clearly likes you.
16. She posts on her social media accounts letting people know she’s with you
If she does this, then it shows that she wants other people to know that you two are hanging out.
Perhaps she’s trying to claim her territory, or she’s just excited to be with you.
Whatever it is, it’s clearly a very good sign that she likes you.
This signal could be portrayed in many different ways, such as a check-in on Facebook with you, an Instagram story or a status update.
17. She’s posting on your Facebook wall or tagging you in things
This is the same as above. She could be doing this because she’s looking to claim her territory. She wants other people to know that you’re close with her.
This can only be a good sign that she likes you.
18. She immediately says yes when you ask to hang out
If she likes you, then it’s no secret that she’ll want to hang out with you.
So when you ask her out on a date, she’ll likely jump at the chance and say yes.
If she has plans or is busy, she’ll probably try to reschedule with you to another time.
Though keep in mind that if you’ve only met once, or it’s an early stage of your relationship, then she won’t want to appear needy. Females are socially intelligent so appearing as non-needy is important to them.
Therefore, she won’t immediately say yes. She may take her time before she says yes, or she might even try to change what you suggested to do.
But in the end, if she likes you, she’ll want to spend more time with you, and she’ll say yes when you ask her out.
19. Keep in that mind that some girls will be indecisive about whether they like you
Some girls will be absolutely interested in you, while others will still be deciding for themselves.
These girls are the type that will treat you like a king one day and then the next day like you mean nothing to them.
I can’t stress this enough: Watch out for these girls, because it could be mean one of two things:
– She’s trying to manipulate and take advantage of you. It’s important to know your worth and avoid being “used” to make herself feel better or to make someone else jealous.
If you think this might be the case, it’s crucial for your emotional health to stay away.
– Or she could simply be indecisive and unsure of what she wants. Again, staying with a girl like this could be bad for your emotional health. She’ll play you around.
It’s best to give someone like this their space and move on.
20. There’s plenty of fish in the sea, so choose wisely
If she does like you, then great, you can ask her out and see where it takes you.
If she doesn’t like you, then that’s also great. You can move on and find someone that is better suited to you.
It’s important to remember that there’s plenty of fish in the sea and you’re kidding yourself if you think that this one girl is the “best” girl for you.
There are all different types of girls in this world, and there are plenty of girls that will make you happy.
Now if you’ve been through these signs and you’re confident she does indeed like you, it’s time to take it further (if that’s what you want to do).
So if she likes you and you think that you might like her, here are some tips on how you can act to get to know her and possibly take the relationship further.
FAQ on how to tell if a girl likes you
How do you know if a girl likes you at work?
By analyzing her eye contact with you. If you look at her and she maintains eye contact with you, she likes you. If her eyes wander to your mouth, she likes you. If she looks away quickly when you catch her looking, she’s probably interested and shy. If she says something to a group or tells a story, she will look straight to you first to see your reaction.
How do you know if a girl is playing hard to get?
If she's a naturally shy person, she might appear like she's playing hard to get. However, she is just trying to protect herself from putting her feelings out there. She may be waiting for you to make the first move so she can be sure you actually like her. If she doesn't give you much in conversations but continues to hang around you and chat with you on messaging apps, then she's likely shy or playing hard to get.
How do you tell if a woman is attracted to you by her eyes?
If she’s interested and forward, she’ll be looking at you and will maintain eye contact when you lock eyes. She may smile or she may scan your face and give you a double-take. This is a pretty obvious sign that she likes you and she isn’t afraid to show it, either. However, if she’s nervous and shy, she may look down when you lock eyes. If she looks away when you notice her looking at you, that’s also a good sign.
Want her to be your girlfriend?
Let me guess….
You treat her well. You’d do anything for her. And you try to show off the best side to your personality.
I used to do all those things. And I consistently struck out with women.
Don’t get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with being nice and treating a girl well. These are great qualities.
But if that’s all you bring to the table, you’re in big trouble.
As I have learned, women don’t choose the guy who will treat them the best. They choose the guy who makes them feel certain powerful emotions. Specifically, they choose the guys they are deeply attracted to at a biological level.
It isn’t that women like assholes, because they’re assholes. They like assholes because those guys are confident and they give off the right signals when they’re flirting. The sort of signals a woman can’t resist.
The simple truth is that a woman’s brain is much more responsive to certain signals than it is to anything you say to them. Or however well you treat them.
What if I told you that you could quickly learn the right signals to give to women—and you absolutely don’t need to become an asshole in the process?
Check out this free video by Kate Spring. As I mentioned above, she’ll show you the right way vs the wrong way to approach and flirt with women.
Kate’s a best-selling author and relationship expert. She’s smart, insightful and tells it like it is.
And in this video she introduces the most effective method I have come across to flirt with women the right way.