Making a move on a girl might be nerve-wracking, particularly if you’re the one doing it.
There are some girls who make it very clear that they like other girls and others who just have no idea how to make their interests known.
Whether you’re looking for your first girlfriend or want to take it to the next level with your best friend, there are several ways to let her know you’re interested.
This article will discuss 12 different ways to make a move on a girl so that she knows what’s going on.
Turn on your gaydar
If you’re not sure if this girl likes other girls, and you want to know, take the time to observe. It’s amazing what you will pick up just by watching someone for a little while.
In other words, use your “gaydar.”
It’s a valuable life skill that will serve you well in many situations, including when you are trying to decide if a girl you’ve interested in is straight or gay.
If you’re in doubt of your “gaydar,” just ask her. Chances are she won’t mind telling you either way. And, if she does mind, she will most likely be very obvious about it.
However, there’s no point wasting your time trying to convince someone who isn’t interested because everyone has their preference when it comes down to dating people.
If you’re reasonably certain a girl will be open to your advances, try the following:
1) Be genuinely interested in her life.
Did you know that even 80% of all communication is non-verbal, that 20% can still make a difference?
So the way you express an interest in a person’s life translates into a much more powerful “emotional bank account” for you both.
Nothing feels better than the feeling of sincerity.
One of the best ways to make a move on a girl is by being genuinely interested in what she has to say. If she volunteers any information about her background or life, pay attention. It will give you a lot to talk about and bond over.
Accordingly, ask open-ended questions that will allow her to talk about herself and her life without interruption. Avoid asking leading questions or questions that require “yes” or “no” answers.
Ask questions such as: How did that make you feel? What was going through your mind at that moment? What were you thinking? What would you like to do next? What are your plans for the future? What else would you like to tell me about yourself?
The more she talks, the more you’ll learn. Don’t be afraid to ask a lot of questions, and listen closely. Because the more she talks, the more you’ll learn.
It’s important to note that, obviously, not all questions will be appropriate to your goal of making a move. But you’d want to build on the engagement. You want her to know you’re willing to make the investment.
Girls love it when they feel special or appreciated.
The more she feels like she’s been heard and can share, the better your chances are of getting a date with this girl! To an extent, she’ll let down her guard and begin to reveal her true feelings and desires.
When you think or see a person you like, your brain releases positive chemicals that naturally cause you to smile. This is because the brain reacts positively to things that make you happy.
And even if you try to hide it, your body will still send out signals of positive regard.
Smiles always have a positive effect on people. And if you want to make a move on another girl, get ready to warm up your facial muscles because you’ll have to use them for a while.
When she looks at your face while speaking or listening, smile back at her – but don’t overdo it. She might think you’ve gone crazy if you keep smiling even after she stops looking at you.
On this occasion though, you don’t want to simply smile when you are around this woman. No, you want that smile to really “beam” which will radiate from your face like a cosmic ray of appreciation.
It’s a win-win situation. After all, aren’t smiles contagious?
3) Use your body language
Well, when a girl is attracted to another girl, the tension can be different. And for girls, body language is a huge part of flirting.
So how can you use your body language to make a move on a girl you like?
Although it may sound funny, the best way to make a move on a girl with your body language is to observe and read her body language.
What do I mean?
What you should be watching for is certain subtle changes in her body language that you can mimic, and at the same time assert yourself and make it clear that you’re interested.
She might have her hair slightly pushed to the side, or she may be leaning closer to you. Maybe even sitting in a position where her knees are almost touching yours.
These are all subtle signs of interest and attraction which can work well if they happen at the same time as your body language is saying, “I like you.”
Eye contact is a great way to make sure you’re looking her in the eyes when communicating with her, and it’s surprisingly hard for women to do.
Because girls are raised to make their eyes pretty and innocent, not powerful.
A good trick is to make some eye contact but then glance away quickly before staring at her again. Another one is when you do a “smize” with your eyes.
It’s important that you stay aware of what kind of signals your own eyes are sending out though, especially when it comes to looking into hers.
Don’t be creepy about this by continuing to stare after she looks back at you once. Maintain eye contact, but break off few seconds until she glances up. And don’t forget to blink.
The key is to make he heart melt and completely disarm her.
Leaning in when a girl’s talking can make her feel you’re giving her your full attention. This will help make it clear that what she has to say is important and interesting.
Be conscious of how you position yourself when you’re talking to her.
What you can do is to lean back slightly if she’s leaning in, and make sure to lean forward when she does.
If you’re standing up while talking to her, make sure not to cross your arms or put your hands in your pockets as this can make you seem closed off and unfriendly.
When leaning towards a girl, make sure not to lean too far over or get up into her personal space. The last thing you want is to make things uncomfortable between you two.
Yawn and stretch
Another classic move is to yawn and stretch your arm as if you’d be putting it around her. This is a great move when you’re hanging out, sitting next to each other, and watching a movie.
Now, this is a more direct gesture to make a move without being too forward. So you have to be on your toes and pay close attention as she responds, and make sure not to go overboard with it comes to touching.
If she welcomes it, keep your arm where it is. Otherwise, simply get up and do something else. The last thing you want to happen is to make things awkward between you two.
When you want to make a move on a girl, simple gestures can help get the message across.
Girls are great at using their hands when it comes to flirting. It can show openness and enthusiasm, which makes you more attractive and fun to talk to.
You can make a move on her by brushing your hair behind your ear.
It’s cheesy, but it’s a classic move.
You can make it more fun by doing this while she’s talking, or make the move after you’ve finished talking.
If done right and with confidence, these moves will make her feel attracted to you without you having to make a big deal out of it.
Touching your neck
Similar to your hands, you can make a move on a girl by touching your own neck while talking about something sexual or flirty with each other.
Keep in mind that this is a more seductive move, so make sure not to do it too often.
You don’t want her thinking you’re weird or creepy, so make this one a special move for when the time is right.
Biting your lips can make you look more attractive, and girls love that. This subtle gesture will make her feel like you’re thinking about kissing her, and it can make a girl melt.
Licking your lips is another subtle and sexy gesture that girls will notice. This lets your mouth stand out so attention is drawn towards your lips.
When it comes to moves on a girl you have the perfect opportunity to make with these simple gestures. Play around and find out what works best for you!
Be careful though: if done incorrectly this gesture might have the opposite effect! You don’t want to look too desperate or weird when making your move, so make sure not to overdo this one.
Making a move on a girl you’re interested in can be nerve-wracking. But you don’t have to let yourself get caught up in nervousness.
Do you make yourself smaller by hunching over or slouching? Are your shoulders tense and stiff, with arms closer to the sides of your body rather than relaxed at ease in front of it as they should be?
The moment you notice any tension building up in your muscles because of nerves, take a deep breath, shake your body, and relax again.
It’s about projecting confidence – so make sure not to look like someone who’s scared or uncomfortable!
4) Make her laugh
Humor is a great way to make a move on a girl. For one, it loosens up a conversation and helps make her feel more comfortable around you.
If you’re the type to tell jokes, make sure they’re well-timed and witty rather than just cheesy or silly. It also shows that you’re confident about yourself and the way you make jokes.
Now, you don’t have to be a jokester.
Sometimes, a clever retort or an interesting observation is enough to make her laugh. So stay on your toes with what you say and keep an ear out for anything that might make her smile.
A great way to make a move on a girl when it comes to humor is by responding playfully whenever she says something flirty or sexy. This will show confidence while also being fun and playful at the same time – which girls love!
If in case a girl cracks a joke at your expense, show genuine amusement and appreciation for her sense of humor. Chances are, she will appreciate you for having the same sense of humor she does.
And that’s not all.
A great way of making a move on a girl through humor is by making fun of yourself. Girls also find it attractive when you can make light of situations, and they love the chance to do some teasing as well.
You don’t have to make a joke out of everything, but make sure not to be too serious all the time either
It’s important that you two get along and enjoy each other’s company in any way possible – including humor.
And, believe it or not, if she senses you’re just “being yourself,” this will put her at ease too, and she’ll start to take notice of your chemistry.
5) Look good for her
Let’s face it: you won’t be successful in making a move on a girl if you look like a mess.
There’s a psychological phenomenon called enclothed cognition which is the way in which our clothes affect how we think, feel, and act.
Our clothes not only send messages about us to others but also to ourselves. Clothing can trigger memories that can elicit emotions more intensely than just with the clothing.
So watching your favorite sports team play or going to a birthday party won’t seem special unless you’re wearing clothes different from your day-to-day wear.
Look good for her. Dress to impress!
You don’t have to go out and spend a fortune on clothes and accessories. Just wear what makes you feel comfortable, and you’ll look much better.
If you make a move on a girl, be intentional with how you would like her to see you.
By making an effort to look good, you won’t just feel confident. You’ll also get to make it clear that you’ve made an effort and put thought into your meet-up.
6) Get a little physical
Don’t make the mistake of thinking that just because you’re a girl, you don’t need to make any physical moves.
Sure, making a move on a girl might not involve kissing or making out. But that doesn’t mean you can’t get physical with her.
A simple brush of skin or touching the small of her back when walking next to each other is a good way to start. These are very subtle ways of sending out signals that you’re interested in.
Holding hands is definitely an excellent choice if the moment seems right. It’s a classic move that couldn’t be more direct with your intention.
You can even make a move on the girl by coming up from behind and hugging her. This will definitely make things seem less awkward if she’s not into you, but it’ll also send signals that your intentions are romantic.
Remember, you have to do what feels natural at that moment. Don’t allow yourself to come across as too forward. You have to wait until she’s comfortable before going ahead with anything.
Just a friendly touch here and there is enough to let her know you’re not just some girl looking for a good time.
Don’t be afraid to get physical with a girl. You might make a move that she wasn’t expecting, but you just never know unless you make it.
7) Give a gift and make it personal
Gift-giving nowadays can seem so impersonal. So if you’re considering making a move on a girl by giving a gift, you’ll need to do a little more work than a gift card.
Don’t make it too extravagant or expensive; you don’t have to break the bank on your gift.
That being said, you can never go wrong with something that’s a little personal.
Like a sticker of her favorite football team. Or a mug with one of her favorite quotes on it. Or a candle with her favorite scent.
You get the idea.
If you make it personal, she’ll know that you were thinking about her when choosing your gift for her and this will make a good impression on her.
It shows that you put some thought into your present. And receiving them can make a girl feel special and one of a kind.
8) Get her alone with you
Making a move on a girl in public can be embarrassing and hard to do. So if you’re not ready for that, make sure you get her alone with you first.
You can do this by asking if she wants to go for a walk around the park or sit somewhere quiet. If you’re at the bar, make sure to get a table far away from everyone else so that it’s just her and you there.
This may make it easier for both of you if she says no or doesn’t reciprocate your feelings towards her in the same way that you feel about her.
Of course, making a move on a girl in front of other people could also make her feel embarrassed or uncomfortable. So make sure you make your move when you think it’s the right time.
9) Ask your friends to put in a good word for you
Your friends are always going to have your back when it comes to helping you make a move on someone you like.
So if your friends know the girl you’re interested in, you could ask one of them to slowly start talking about you. They can talk about you and your life. This will make her curious about you and your life.
You can also ask them to make a funny comment or two about how you’re into girls but haven’t found one she likes yet.
This way, not only does it make it clear that you’re interested in the same sex, but it makes your friends seem like fun people who don’t mind getting weird with their friendships every now and then for a laugh.
Now, this could go two ways.
On one end, she might respond positively to your friends’ antics and make it obvious that she’s interested in you.
On the other hand, she might make it very clear to your friend that she’s not into you that way.
In case this happens, that’s okay. Please don’t be discouraged.
You don’t have to cut ties just because she sees you only as a friend at this time.
Remember, attraction is a very mysterious thing.
One minute she can be into you, and the next minute she’s not, despite her having been interested in you just a day before.
So, even if she doesn’t like you the way you like her or make it clear that she’s not into girls at all, don’t be discouraged. That’s just the way things are, sometimes.
One last thing: make sure you don’t make your friends feel awkward by inviting them into a situation they’re not comfortable being in.
The last thing you want to happen is to make your friend feel like they have to make a move on this girl for you.
That’s not something anyone should be subjected to, and it will make your friendship feel weird from that point onwards.
10) Be involved in her world
If you want to make a move on a girl, you can assert yourself to be part of her world by participating in activities around her if possible.
So how can you be more a part of her life?
There are many ways, but one of the easiest is to simply start going to the places she goes.
If she’s into fitness, go to the gym with her. If she’s into playing pool, play pool with her. If she’s a fan of a certain band, go see them.
Take an interest in whatever she’s interested in and make it a point to make time for these activities.
When you’re ready to take things to the next level, you can take part in conversations going on with friends and family members when you’re around them.
This can make it very easy for you to make a move, especially if she feels like she’s always had you there. This helps make things feel natural so that your presence doesn’t seem forced or awkward.
Think about this: if you make an effort to know the people in her life, it will make your relationship more intimate.
Why is that?
Because knowing who she is outside of a romantic context can also give you information about how likely each person would be to approve or disapprove of your make a move on her.
But remember: don’t overdo it. Keep it low-key.
You want to be someone who’s an accepted part of her life, but not someone who’s forcing herself into doing stuff just because you’re attracted to her.
You want to be the girl who’s part of her circle of trust. Someone who’s there when she needs someone to talk to, and who’s supportive in times of need.
But you also want to be the girl but don’t interfere with her freedom to live her life.
11) Be omnipresent
In this day and age, if you want to make a move on a girl, presence is important on all communication platforms.
Text messaging is the most common way to keep in contact.
Most of the time, it’s enough just to make a girl your like feel your presence.
You don’t need to make any big gestures in order to get her attention on text messages, but you need to make an impact.
Make sure she knows you’re looking at every message she sends and make your replies quick so she knows
Social Media and Instant Messaging
So if texting is the most common way to make a move on a girl, what about other platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, and Whatsapp?
Well, it all depends on what she has and how she uses them.
Remember, social media is a very powerful tool to get to know someone. And if the girl you’re interested in is actively posting on social media to showcase her life, make sure to engage when you can.
Make your presence known by liking and commenting on posts and pictures that you feel would help you connect more with her.
But make it casual. Don’t bombard her with excessive likes and comments that will make you seem like a stalker.
Phone and video calls
Actively engaging in text messages and social media is great, but it can lack intimacy.
If you really want to make a move on a girl, make sure to engage her through phone and video calls.
You don’t need to make the calls long or complicated. But make sure that through them, she knows that you’d be there if she needs someone at any moment.
12) Ask her out
You can’t be more direct than that.
Asking a girl out is a make-it-or-break-it situation.
This is where you make your intentions clear, and this is what she’ll base her answer on.
So make sure that when you ask her out, make the date casual but exciting at the same time.
More importantly, make sure to make it clear that this is a date so there’s no mistaking what kind of invitation it is.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking she’ll pick up on your intentions when you ask her out for dinner or coffee.
And if possible, make your plans public.
That way, other people will know you’re not just asking her out to make your move, but to take a chance and see how it goes.
Take a chance
There are many ways to make a move on a girl if you’re a girl.
But in order to get the attention of a girl, you must first test whether or not she’s open to having an intimate relationship with another woman.
It’s not rocket science to make a move on a girl, but it can be nerve-wracking. So it’s important to make an effort and practice.
Be genuinely interested in her interests and passions. This will make her feel special and make a move on her seem like the right thing to do.
Take advantage of this opportunity to get to know her better. You could discover an interest in common that allows you to create a more intimate connection.
Find subtle ways of signaling your attraction through mimicking and responding through body language and physical contact. The experience can make a difference.
Don’t forget to smile, and make her laugh. Humor and laughter can make both of you feel more comfortable and relaxed around each other.
Gift her with something personal and close to her heart. It doesn’t have to be grand. The simple ones sometimes make the biggest impact.
Make an effort to look good. Being an eye candy to her can help move things along with your intentions.
Use an indirect approach to make a move on her and get her alone in a private setting where you two can talk more intimately without distractions or interruptions.
Use an even more indirect approach by asking a trusted friend to build you up. Sometimes a girl needs to hear it from someone else to get the wheel rolling.
Be involved in her world, on and offline. Do some of the things she likes doing, and do your best to connect with her friends.
Remember that you don’t have to make an immediate decision about whether or not she’s right for you. But consider how your connection meshes in terms of emotional intimacy and physical attraction.
The best way is to be yourself and let things flow naturally between both of you.
So don’t wait around for her to make a move. You’re definitely not going to be successful in making a move on a girl if you sit around and wait for her to make one.
Finally, don’t be afraid of rejection because it’s not personal.
Being rejected by one person doesn’t mean that no other girl will ever be interested in you.
It could mean that this particular girl isn’t the right fit for your specific tastes or interests at this time.
So don’t let it get to you.
Besides, just because she’s not into you right now doesn’t mean she won’t be in the future.
If she seems to be worth your time, keep trying and make a move on her when you feel it’s right.
You never know what could happen and when the opportunity will knock, so always keep the door open.
Because anything can happen with love. So don’t ever give up.
Over to you: have any one of these strategies worked for you? What was your experience like?
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.