You’ve been seeing this guy and all was going well until it wasn’t. Now you’ve found yourself “on a break” and the last thing you want is for him to move on during it!
I’ve been in this situation before, and keeping his attention even while you’re not together is easier to do than you might think. Read on for 15 proven ways to make a guy miss you during a break…
1) Live your best life
Being told to live your best life when you’re feeling down in the dumps is one of those “easier said than done” statements, but it will work if you want to make him miss you.
I know the temptation to stay in and wallow is strong. I also know how much staying in pajamas, eating comfort food, and willing the phone to ring is needed in times like this.
But, in the long run, it won’t do you any good.
So, what can you do to live your best life?
- Meet up with friends. Go on that girls holiday you’ve always talked about, spend time with loved ones, even connect with old friends if you can.
- Carry on with your life. Work, exercise, run errands, basically keep on living your life as if nothing has changed.
- Stay focussed on your goals. If learning a new skill was on your list of things to do, go for it! If you’ve got an exam to study for, keep working hard towards it.
- Do something you’ve always wanted to try. Whether you’ve always wanted to learn how to knit or skydive, try something new and enjoy it!
The point of this is to keep your spirits up and stop you from falling into a pit of misery while you wait to see what happens with the guy you’re on a break with.
But more than that, it’s to make him see how resilient and independent you are – no matter what you face in life, you’re going to keep living yours and making the most out of it!
2) Be too busy to contact him
Now, if you do keep living your best life, you’ll naturally have less time to think about him.
Because even though you’re on a break, it’s easy to fall back into the habit of texting and calling as you usually would.
That’s why keeping busy is essential.
The more you’re distracted, the less you’ll be tempted to pick up the phone. And by reducing how much you contact him, you’ll end up making him miss you terribly and he’ll wonder why you’ve gone quiet.
A few tips on staying busy:
- Pick up a new hobby – learn a new language or how to play an instrument.
- If you feel lonely at night, instead of being on your phone try reading a book or putting on a film.
- Get out and exercise. The endorphins will make you feel better and you’ll be away from your phone.
- Spent time helping others – get involved with your local community or help out a family member or friend.
So even if you miss him, you’ve got to find things to do to take your mind off him.
Distract yourself with friends, use the tips above, and most importantly, don’t contact him just because you’re bored.
And while we’re on the subject of distractions, the next point below is one to watch out for…
3) Stay away from social media…but not too much
The truth is social media works in two ways.
You’ll want to stay away from it as much as possible, even though it’s the ideal distraction from contacting your guy.
Because your online silence will leave him wondering what you’re up to. Especially if you’re someone who’s usually quite active online.
His imagination will run wild – what could you possibly be so busy with that you don’t even have time to pop online?
That’s the first way to use social media to make him miss you.
But there’s one other way you can use it to your advantage:
Strategically post pictures or check-ins, but don’t go overboard.
For example, if you’ve been out with friends, showing off your best life online will make him see how you’re not sitting at home waiting for him to call.
If you’re eating out, you might check in to the restaurant without tagging who you’re with.
Your guy might think you’re potentially on a date, and we all know jealousy is one way of keeping a guy interested.
The bottom line is:
Posting too much on social media takes away the chance of him missing you. Posting the odd picture of you looking fabulous will catch his eye and leave him wanting to know more.
4) Leave behind a reminder
This might not be easy to do if you’re already on a break, but if you happen to meet up with him, don’t leave without leaving something of yours behind in his car or house.
It doesn’t have to be something extremely significant, but just enough to remind him of you when he comes across it.
When I was on a break with my boyfriend, I left behind one of his t-shirts which I used to wear to sleep (in other words, a t-shirt of his that I had adopted as my own).
I could have taken it with me, I genuinely liked it for myself, but I knew it had some sentimental value to him too.
I wasn’t surprised, therefore, when he later said the sight of the t-shirt hanging on the back of his door made him miss me during the time we were on a break.
So, whether it’s something as small as your hair bobble or as sentimental as a gift he once gave you, give him a reason to remember you during your time apart.
5) Pamper yourself
There’s never a bad time to pamper yourself, but if you’re on a mission to make a guy miss you during a break, now’s the time to go all out.
And by pampering, I don’t just mean passing the days at the spa.
Although that isn’t a bad shout – you’ll come out looking relaxed and feeling refreshed.
I mean pamper yourself by looking after yourself:
- Eat and stay hydrated. When you eat well, it shows in your energy levels, you’ll have clearer skin, and your overall appearance will improve.
- Exercise. Again, it’ll make you look and feel great.
- Get plenty of sleep. Keep away those dark circles!
- Work in a form of relaxation. Yoga, meditation, being creative, do what makes you feel you’re at your most relaxed.
So what’s the point in doing all this, apart from making yourself feel better?
Well, when you pamper yourself, yes you’ll look great but you’ll also be in a better place to make him miss you. You’ll think clearer and have less need to contact him.
Instead of feeling miserable about being on a break, you’ll be spending time on yourself and this will shine through.
He’ll find it hard to resist you whenever you meet or he sees you around – how could he not when you’re practically glowing from all the self-care and love?
6) Keep conversations short
Now, at some point during your break, you’ll probably hear from your guy (if you don’t, it’s not a good sign unless you’ve agreed to no contact).
But when he does call or text, try to be as short about it as possible.
Don’t be rude, but don’t prolong the conversation.
When I went through this, I’d usually:
- Wait for a little before replying (even if I wasn’t doing anything at the time).
- Reply to his questions but rarely ask any back apart from asking how he’s doing etc.
- Give some details about what I’d been up to but also stayed quite aloof to keep him curious.
- Wrap up the conversation first by saying I had to get ready to go out (again, not always divulging what amazing (made up) plans I had).
There’s a fine line between being elusive and just downright cold though, so tread lightly.
You want to make him miss you – you don’t want him to think you’ve lost all interest in him.
7) Be patient and trust the process
What I mean to say here is don’t rush things.
I know you can’t wait to get back together. Maybe he can’t either.
But it’s easy to forget the reason why you’re on a break in the first place. The most common cause is that you’re not getting along and you need some breathing space.
So take the space and don’t be in such a hurry to smooth things over. A break can be a good thing for a relationship, in some cases.
Giving him time to think won’t only be beneficial for your relationship, it’ll also give you some much-needed time apart. And as they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Without it, he wouldn’t have the chance to miss you!
So keep that in mind when you’re tempted to throw the towel in on your break.
Now, you don’t want to drag this on forever either, so my advice is to trust the process until you’re 100% sure that your issues have been resolved.
Only get back together when you know your relationship can handle it, and not a minute sooner.
Trust me, this will help you out in the long run, and in the meantime, your absence will make him miss you more and more as each day passes.
8) Show him how desirable you are
We touched on jealousy very briefly earlier on, but it’s not something to be overlooked.
And while I’m not saying you need to upload pictures to social media of you making out with random guys, there are subtle ways to make him realize how attractive you are to other people.
I remember having lunch with my boyfriend once when we were on a break. A cute waiter was serving us, so I smiled once or twice until I caught his eye.
My boyfriend noticed the waiter smiling back and his expression instantly changed. After we parted, he started texting me more.
The bottom line is:
He missed me more because he was afraid of someone else swooping in and stealing my attention. So, work that charm and show him what he’s missing out on.
Now, that’s one way to do it.
Another effective way is by accidentally calling him.
It’s the oldest trick in the book, I know, but it works.
When you’re next out with friends, in a busy bar or restaurant, “accidentally” call him and leave the call running while you laugh and chat away.
After a few minutes, hang up the phone. Later on, you can message saying how you think your phone might have dialed his number while in your pocket.
If you can make it convincing, he’ll have heard you have a great time and will probably be feeling pretty left out and jealous.
9) Be the bigger person
Another way to make a guy miss you during a break is to be mature about it.
If you start acting needy or come across as impatient or desperate, he’s not going to miss you at all. If anything, it might put him off further.
And the truth is, you’re on a break for a reason. Whether he initiated it, you did, or it was a mutual decision.
So the last thing you want is for the break to become permanent.
That’s why being the bigger person is key to keeping him in your life.
When you take the high road, you’ll automatically come across as more attractive. You’ll make him feel silly for potentially losing someone so great for him, so level-headed and calm.
And I know this is easier said than done – you’re emotional, especially if you’re not on good terms with each other.
But if you can put your emotions to one side and speak rationally with him when you need to (including during arguments) it’ll do wonders for making him miss being around you.
10) Don’t be available too often
Depending on the type of break you’re on, you might still see your guy from time to time.
Many couples take a step back from the relationship to be friends while they work through their issues.
Usually, this is because you still want to be part of each other’s lives, just not as intensely as before.
But as nice as this can be, you don’t want to overdo it.
It’s the same as with texting and calling, it’s fine to keep in touch now and then but if you go overboard, it’ll take away any chance of him missing you.
And the truth is:
If you carry on as if you’re in a relationship (meeting up with him, giving him the good stuff, you know what I mean) he might see no need to end the break.
After all, he’s getting the same as when you were together, minus the responsibility of being in a relationship.
That’s why you can’t be available too often.
Make him crave you. Be busy, too busy to meet up whenever he asks to. See him on your terms, only when it suits you.
And even then, you should be the one to bring a meet-up to an end – of course citing that you’re off to do something interesting and mysterious – so that he doesn’t get too comfortable.
11) Look your best when you do see him
But with the previous point in mind, l can’t emphasize the importance of looking your absolute best when you do see him.
Even if you’re past that stage of lust and there are real, deep feelings between you, you can still use your appearance to your advantage.
Never underestimate the power and allure of attraction!
Here are a few tips to help:
- Change up your style. Use the break to get your hair done, buy clothes you’d normally shy away from, just mix things up a little.
- Don’t go overboard. You want to look naturally hot, not with a face full of makeup unless that’s your thing. If it’s not, he’ll be able to tell how hard you’re trying.
- Wear something you know he’ll like. Most guys will let you know when they like a particular outfit or style, so you should have some idea of what he’s into.
- Wear his favorite perfume. Just a light mist of it so he catches a whiff when you lean in to talk to him.
- Use colors that suit you. Whether it helps to make your eyes pop or it gives your skin a glow, pick your colors wisely to help captivate his attention.
The truth is:
Looking your best will come naturally if you follow my point above, about pampering yourself.
Because beauty and happiness radiate from the inside out. So, the better you look after yourself by eating, sleeping, and exercising well, the more irresistible you’ll seem to him.
And when you do meet, remember to keep things lighthearted.
Of course, if you’re there to discuss your relationship things might get intense. But if it’s not for that reason, looking good and keeping things fun (even flirty) will make him miss you more than ever.
12) Keep some things a mystery
Here’s the thing:
Making a guy miss you during a break isn’t difficult – it’s just about being mysterious.
If you spend hours chatting away over text the first time he messages, you take away any mystery. He has no reason to think about you after. He has no reason to miss you.
The same goes for meeting up too often. Or for posting too many pictures of yourself on social media.
Everything comes down to mystery.
The more he doesn’t know, the more he’ll want to find out.
And as this feeling grows during your break, it’ll become impossible for him to think of anything else.
Now, if you’re sitting there thinking, “I’m rubbish at keeping it all in, how will I ever appear mysterious?”, don’t worry.
It’s not as hard as you think. For starters, don’t answer every question he asks. Simply change the subject if you feel like you’re waffling on and giving too many details away.
Secondly, not posting so much on social media will already make you out to be more mysterious than before, so use that to your advantage. Only post strategically.
And finally, get out and actually do stuff.
If you want to appear mysterious and interesting, do things that back it up. Go on a crazy adventure and don’t mention it to him.
This will help you come across as genuine instead of as if you had it all planned out.
13) Make the most of being on a break
Now, you’ve been focused on making him miss you during this break, and for good reason.
You don’t want this break to be the end of you guys. You want him to miss you and wish he could make up with you.
But while you’re doing this, it’s important to make the most of being on a break.
Don’t see it as just a game of getting his attention back.
- “Why are we on a break in the first place?”. Get to the root of the issue and pinpoint why things went wrong.
- “Am I trying to make him miss me for the right reasons?”. Are you doing it because you truly want him back, or just because you want to cheer yourself up?
- “What can I work on during this break to help the relationship?”. Take responsibility for yourself and your role in the relationship.
- “What changes do I want to see if we’re to get back together?”. A break is useless if you get back together and nothing has changed.
Why is it important to ask yourself these questions?
Well, if you’re going to go through all this effort to make him miss you, it better be for someone worth it.
That’s why you’ve got to be sure this relationship is worth fighting for before you go to any lengths to get his attention.
14) Don’t be obvious about getting his attention
But when you do want to get his attention and make him miss you, just make sure you do it with grace.
Don’t make it obvious – I know you already know this but it’s easy to slip up when you’re trying to act “cool”.
A girlfriend of mine once saw a guy she was on a break with when she was out shopping.
Against her initial thought of going over and saying hi, she decided to leave and instead sent him a text once she got home. She simply said:
“Hey, saw you at the mall today. Sorry I couldn’t stop to say hey, I was in a rush. You look good, hope you’re well.”
He instantly replied saying he wished he’d seen her, and what a shame that they couldn’t have grabbed a coffee or something together.
She’s achieved three things here:
- She’s shown she’s not desperate to see him, hence why she left without saying hi.
- She’s shown that she’s busy and has important things to do, which is why she didn’t have time to go over.
- She complimented him ever so slightly. That’ll make him feel good and want more.
So you see, there are ways to get his attention without actually getting his attention.
It’s just a matter of finding the right moment to do it, to make it seem perfectly natural instead of forced and obvious.
15) Keep being your fabulous self
And finally, the best way to make a guy miss you during a break is to just keep being yourself.
I know I’ve given you a load of tips to catch his eye and make him yearn for you, but none of them should involve compromising who you are as a person.
If he’s going to miss you, he should miss the real you!
So, keep doing you. Live your life to the max. Be happy.
And here’s the thing:
Maybe seeing you acting how you did when you guys first met, before getting involved romantically, will jog his memory and make him remember why he fell for you in the first place.
And if it doesn’t work?
If he doesn’t miss you and your break turns into a real break up?
Well, you’ll have still retained your life. You’ll be upset, of course, but you won’t have lost yourself in the process.
You’ll have been maintaining your social life, looking after yourself, and doing things you enjoy.
Because ultimately there’s always the possibility things might not work out. Not every couple goes through a break to come back together successfully.
And there may be the chance he doesn’t want a relationship with you anymore following on from the time you’ve spent apart.
But the most important thing is that you’ll be set up to get over him much faster than if you’d spent the entire break crying at home in bed.
So there we have it, 15 ways to make a guy miss you during a break.
I used most of these tactics with my boyfriend (we were on a break for a month or so at the start of our relationship, for reasons I won’t bore you with) and they worked like a dream.
Now, I’m not saying you have to play games and manipulate him.
Far from it.
All I’m saying is that with a bit of tact, a dose of courage, and a little planning, you can make him miss you in no time without even being around him.
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